@SacredHeart,
There is no need to tell, she suspected has people watching her back.
I think if his wife is gone often, and he has 3 children, 5 grandchildren, 2nd marriage he wants it to work but he can't make it work as he wants it to, there is a void in his life, called "lust" .
You are fueling that and as you can't find someone to be yours " you know that soul mate, forever, you go back" in hope.
The reality is, he isn't yours he isn't going to leave, he will play on your heartstrings because the void you can fill and he may even honestly have some love for you, but , it's never going to go anywhere.
If you don't mentally let him go, you can't move on, and new relationships won't work.
Time to love you and let things go.