Best & most imaginative exit lines.

I hate to see you leave but I love to watch you go.

"Either those drapes go or I do"

Get the fu-- out of here! And take your toys with you!

Wilde?

Yes, that was kinda wilde wasn't it.

Speaking of Wilde...

Every man kills the thing he loves, so here's some cab fare. Please leave me so I can strangle my new mistress in peace.

"You haven't bought a ticket to fly out here yet, have you?"

Well probably not those words exactly. I once carried on a long-distance relationship (Boston-Columbus) for about a year. When I called to tell I was taking some vacation time around Memorial Day to fly out to see her, there was a long pause at her end of the line. And then...

believe so.....

The strangest, and even I'm hesitating to think it's funny, exit that happened to me was non-verbal in a way. And I've told this story on this site somewhere before.

I was out with this girl I dated a few times. Only reason I was dating this girl is because I was bored at the time. She wasn't all that attractive, and was as bright as a bag of smashed lightbulbs. But she liked sex.

We were at a bar, and she asked me if I wanted to be boyfriend/girlfriend with her. I told her no, and she kind of got quiet and teary-eyed. Few minutes later of just standing there, she turns her wrist over and shows me a scar on her wrist. "I tried to kill myself once" she says to me very matter-of-factly.

I immediately left with her, went home, ended up having sex, and never talked to her again. That was just weird.

You have an uncanny ability to pick the rare gems, Slappy.

Gus, I just say...give the special people a chance.

It's probably best that littlek doesn't hear this conversation.

You used up all my hair spray

I'm allergic to your semen.

I'm too nice!
I'd say things like " Let's take a break for a while
to re-evaluate our feelings for each other..."

Once, and only once, did I kiss another guy in the
presence of a current boyfriend. When he complained,
I told him I decided to put our relationship on ice
for a while.

I was very young then and still ashamed of my action.

What goes around, comes around, so I try to be nice -
always!

Ideally: I become such a witch with a capital "B", that the guy will be running like hell, and never look back

Ideally? That's some ideal!

You're deflating my ego!

(Believe it or not, I actually received this one. Many years ago by a fellow called Dick.)

It won't work because you're Catholic.


(This did happen to me. There is some irony in this.)

Mine works and I'm Catholic.

Catholic girls are easy to break up with, especially if they are lapsed. Admit to a sudden conversion, and say "Jesus told me to break up with you" and watch them run.