How do you like to be approached by men?

i think the penis statement would work well on the porno gals...it didn't work for me, izzyrose,unhappyheart,mommaprude, and a few others 'round here tho.

I have learned over the years that I am catastrophically bad at meeting women. I have chosen to embrace my ineptness.

nooooo, not true.

you just have to look good to her first...and then win her with your intelligence and caring and funny and wealthy self.

honestly, my husband and i met at a bar for a drink...i immediately liked him...i knew i'd be with him for a while at least. then after one hour with him, i thought he could be "the one." he was just himself....very casual, very polite, a little flirtacious. he's great.

I hear you Kicky, and empathize.

The female version to this would be what I do. Scenario: I spot a hot looking guy checking me out. I immediately look away, so the poor guy dosen't stand a chance and neither do I. Now that's pathetic.

I must change, or I'll be doomed.

Kicky

Try saying "dark chocolate" :-)

I'm going to comprise a small list of the biggest mistakes guy's have made with me as far as bad opening lines.

Tomorrow.

That wouldn't have worked on me Kicky, but if you said it tasted like cheescake, I'd be all over you ;-)

Hmmmmmmm - some cute ones that have happened to me:

Man putting his foot on the pressure plate in the pavement for an automatic door which I was about to enter, bowing elaborately, and sweepingly ushering me through the door - all with a very self-mocking twinkle and a lovely smile - he also held his hand over his heart! This made me laugh helplessly - and it was easy for him to start chatting then.

Fella in pub kind of subtly looking at me for a while, then looking away, then, when he knew he had caught my eye, raising his glass to me, smiling, and asking in gesture if he could come over - it would have been very different if he had stared rudely.

Fella pulling into an alley in front of me when I was walking on the footpath (on a very crowded street - so it wasn't spooky) - asking directions, then, as I walked on, saying that he went to the same uni (this one is ages ago), had been watching me all year, and that he had finally decided he couldn't be shy and stupid any more, and would I have coffee?

Simple stuff, like "you have the best laugh" (I laugh a lot) - or "I couldn't help hearing you mention x - and I wondered if you could tell me....." are very simple, too - and allow someone to indicate easily back to you if they are at all interested.

I mean, the thing is, I guess, just to make a simple or humorous kind of contact, and get the ball in the air - see if it is tossed back....but I am sure you know that.

Humour, twinkly eyes, a warm funny smile, and just showing polite interest do it for me - a little comment when we are both waiting to be served in a shop, or at a bar, or a coffee shop - not overtly sexual stuff, or cockiness, or aggressiveness. I have never been offended by a nice approach - and I make a point of letting the fella know his approach was appreciated, (when it is clearly a full on approach) even if I do not choose to follow up on it.

Fruit bits in shops seem to be a favourite place, I note - fellas seem to like to ask about ripeness, or taste, of fruits - and it is actually quite sensual explaining to someone how to tell if a rockmelon (you call it cantaloupe, I think?) is ripe!!!

try saying this - "Hello, I heard you were looking for me. My name is Mr Right"

hmmmm


That's a good start . . . but it doesn't exactly capture Kicky's personality. Try this Kicky:

"Hello, I heard you were looking for me. My name is Mr. Right -- my male anatomy is named Moby Dick and it tastes like chocolate."

Does it need more tweaking?

Cheesecake Debra, it tastes like cheesecake ;-)

You could try the 'rescuer' approach. You know, find a guy hitting on a woman in a bar and get all agro on him. "Get yer hands off her you damn dirty ape!" The one problem with this is that it often leads to "Oops, sorry, I didn't realize he was your husband."

I think you folk are not taking poor Kicky at all seriously.

No wonder he gets drunk so often and has to be walked home...

"Poor pitiful me" works on lots of chicks with good hearts and low self-esteem, and if they are already walking him home...

As an exercise, today, I am going to make serious eye contact with a man, a HOTTY if you will.
I should be able to spot at least one guy that is somewhat attractive. I might even say something flirtatious.
The only thing is, I will be pushing my elderly mom in a wheel chair, I'm taking her to a fair, it's not exactly the best scenario for flirting, but it's just an exercise. (I have a habit of immediately looking away when hotties are near)

Any suggestions? Besides the obvious (don't catapult mama out of the chair because I'm not paying attention)

Paulaj,

Baby steps are good. I used to be really shy with women and missed out on a lot of opportunities. I decided one day to stop being a wuss and do something about it. But it is hard to do a 180 degree turn just over night. So I started off like your idea. Just make eye contact and say "hi" every chance you get. I moved on to opening doors and saying stupid stuff like "After you."

It doesn't really matter what you say becasue you are slowly just gaining your courage and confidence with every little hello. Soon I was making conversations in line at the grocery store and gaining confidence. It is amazing what a little confidence can do. In no time flat you'll have to be beating guys away with a stick.

Jpm

I'm shy in person, that's why I love this forum. Baby steps, are perfect :-)

I've always found that bath houses are a good place for me to meet men.

Your better at this than me.