I'm 42....he's 17!! it's long. sorry)

Ok...this is my first time here so go easy on me if I don't quite understand how everything works right away.

The first thing i'd like to get out is that yes...i'm 42 and he is in fact 17, BUT there has been no sex for that very reason. So let's not go there just yet. Hah.

So I'm not going to go into the entire scenario here...just the basic facts. I am in fact in love with this kid. How did it happen? Its difficult to say really. He has been my son's friend for a couple of years now (taboo i know). I noticed him right away when he first started to come over because he was quiet, reserved, respectful...unlike a lot of kids these days. Always willing to help out around the house if I asked. Talked to me about his problems with girls, school, life in general. He spent most of the summer at my house, spending every night there...while his parents never even bothered to call and see how he was. I noticed after a while that he started to come by a lot and hang around even when my son was not there, which wasn't a big deal to me. My son is never gone for long so I always knew when he'd be coming home so I didn't worry too much about it. Anyway...I'm not sure at what point I realized that I didn't feel exactly 'motherly' to him. I thought about him constantly, missed him when he wasn't around, etc etc. Then I realized also that I had quit seeing anyone else. As a single parent for about 3 years I had my share of dates...always with guys younger than me (they were anywhere from 21-35 years old...never older than that). But suddenly I didn't care about seeing anyone but him. Believe me...I tried to stop whatever this was and knew that it was wrong on a few levels. But then I figured if I didn't approach him sexually then it was ok. We have only kissed and I won't touch him otherwise. I might love and care about him but he's not worth going to prison for by any means.

He told me a couple of days ago that he wanted to get married when he is 18. LOL! My jaw just fell to the floor. I told him he may feel that way now...but it's hard to say what could happen in the next year. Now don't get me wrong I know for a fact that even if I were to marry him then, at some point he would realize that he needs to be with someone his own age and have a family. I've obviously done that already. Would it be wrong to spend a few years with him happy and not caring about what people think? Would he actually marry me at the point? Who knows. I'm not sure I want advice or if I just wanted to get that out...but there ya go anyway. lol. Guess I'm ready for the bashing now