11
   

I can't stay faithful

 
 
G2g
 
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 05:27 pm
As much as I want to, I have a cheating problem. My husband and I have been married for 6 years. We only dated 6 months but even then I was cheating. I was faithful for about 2 years but was in a emotional relationship during that time that kept me tied. Now I don't know what to do. My husband found out about the emotional affair that went on for about 3 years. I had to cut it and am completely heart broke. I just started a physical affair a few months ago and am hooked. Don't know how to quit it but it's became like I can't go without two men in my life. I am 24 with 3 boys. So I am not looking to divorce as I love my husband. It seems that my emotional affair kept me grounded to just my husband and him but hubby made me quit it 😳
 
Glennn
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 05:51 pm
@G2g,
Do you want your husband to approve of your extramarital affair?
0 Replies
 
Leadfoot
 
  -1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 05:54 pm
@G2g,
You idiot humans. When will you ever figure out that you were never intended to love only one other being.

Keep trying to do that. You'll only end up driving yourself insane.
Glennn
 
  3  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:07 pm
@Leadfoot,
If multiple sexual partners serves your purpose, then have at it. But I would suggest finding a partner who shares that idea. If you don't, then you might end up being slapped by someone.

Also, claiming that not doing so will drive a person insane is incorrect.
Leadfoot
 
  2  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:19 pm
@Glennn,
You are confusing lust with love, a common mistake.
G2g
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:20 pm
My husband I have hinted multiple times and he won't agrees. He can sense that I think about other people. He hacked my phone, pulled all my messages and was reading when I was in emotional affair. The details were of course sexual in nature. He doesn't he want to do stuff in bed like kinky, or role playing even.
Glennn
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:21 pm
@Leadfoot,
I am addressing the topic in the context that the OP has offered. What are you addressing?
0 Replies
 
G2g
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:21 pm
@Leadfoot,
I want to love my husband. I want to keep us together as a family but it tortures me that I want others to.
ehBeth
 
  4  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:24 pm
@G2g,
Sounds like you and your husband are not in the same place sexually and that you have different expectations of relationships.

He is looking for an exclusive relationship, which you are unable to provide for him.

He wants a wife who will be faithful to him.

While I understand that you want to stay married to him, it's not really fair to him. If you really love him, you should think about letting him know straight out that you can't be faithful and will give him a divorce so he can find a wife who will be faithful to him.

Do you have a job that you can do to support yourself after the marriage ends? you should probably do some serious planning for the future.
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:25 pm
@G2g,
G2g wrote:
I am 24 with 3 boys.


whatever you do, make sure you are doubling up on birth control until after the marriage ends.
Glennn
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:26 pm
@G2g,
Quote:
The details were of course sexual in nature.

So your husband will not approve of extramarital sex. And you are unhappy about that, and are frustrated that he is boring when it comes to sex. Does that sum it up?
Leadfoot
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:31 pm
@G2g,
As I said, it is not as uncommon as you think. Maybe it will help if you accept that you are not sick or perverted but rather that you are living in a sick and perverted society.

You said you were in an 'emotional affair'. Was the hope of sex all you got out of it? Would you throw it away if sex would never come of it?

It is a sad commentary that most husbands (and wives) would feel even more betrayed if you told him you loved the man of your 'affair' rather than lusted after him.
G2g
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:31 pm
@Glennn,
Yes. I am not saying it's shitty sex. My side man sex isn't good either. I'm not in it so much for the sex but the attention I guess.
G2g
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:32 pm
@ehBeth,
My husband has a vesectomy. I am not on birth control.
G2g
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:34 pm
@ehBeth,
No I am stay at home. My husband is to make matters worse, in the service. We are moving to another country for 2 years in a couple months. I will be just his and am afraid I'll struggle with trying to seek out another guy. I think it's mental.
Glennn
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:35 pm
@G2g,
You're saying that what you desire is more attention. But your husband doesn't approve of you getting the attention you need. Does that sum it up?
G2g
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:37 pm
@Leadfoot,
I do love the other man. To make it worse, the other man was a ex of mine like 8 years ago. He left me for his now wife and trust me I tried but he won't cheat on his wife physical. That killed me but I enjoyed the sexting and let it stay that way until I got caught.
G2g
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:38 pm
@Glennn,
Right. My husband like most people wants only him to be the one I desire. He gives me attention but I don't want it from just him. I crave and lust others to.
Leadfoot
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:39 pm
@G2g,
Consider the possibility that what you are feeling the need of is not sex but intimacy.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  2  
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2016 06:54 pm
@G2g,
You want to have sex with other men. Double up on birth control. Something for you + condoms.

__

You need to start thinking about how you are going to support yourself when this marriage ends.
 

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