I believe what you said, but unfortunately there is no solution to the problem using socially accepted rules. You have to either accept them or find your own.
Doing the former gives no lasting satisfaction and the latter can be lonely.
There is no shame in trying to find happiness within societies' rules and a measure of it can be found. It all depends on what you are willing to settle for. Personally, I'm holding out for better rules and betting things get better after this party is over.