Hey, Letty, you're welcome. I felt a little crazy today.
Panzade, okay, I'm sorry already. You're not a pansy! Hey, aren't you guys having a hurricane about now?
Quote:"bobber on my testicles"
Gus, you are a true genius. The mental picture. It's all about the mental picture.
Yes, ehbeth, I know a girl who must do kegels, because she can do things. Nice things.
Just cracked the cap off a new bottle of Meyers Rum...and tossed it in the trash can. Hurricane party! Wooo Hoooo!
Oh dear, Gus, it does sound as if you could benefit from the Dave Barry form of Daoism. Bobbers, that is sooo sweet.
I would go for an enlargement, because I have not seen mine in years. I need to be reassured that I'm still male!
Remember that detachable penis song?
Something about how he woke up and lost his penis again.
...and how his detachable penis comes handy but sometimes gets him in trouble?
That song came on one morning when my family was going to church. Awkward moment.
Sure Jo, but a great way for your Mom to start discussing the birds and the bees.
Joahaeyo wrote:Remember that detachable penis song?
Something about how he woke up and lost his penis again.
...and how his detachable penis comes handy but sometimes gets him in trouble?
That song came on one morning when my family was going to church. Awkward moment.
I have an inkling it was by Devo, but I'm not sure.
It was King Missile, I believe.
Memories
Detatchable Penis, by King Missile
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.
[background singing begins: "detachable penis" over and over]
This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home, when I think it's gonna get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out, when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn't find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
'cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time.
So I told them if it pops up to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man,
and I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house,
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.
Then, as I walked down Second Avenue towards St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.
I took it home, washed it off,
and put it back on. I was happy again. Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know.
Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.
[background voices continue to sing "detachable penis" for
a while, then out]
found this Viagra report at the Poison News Headlines Web site, which said it had grabbed it from The New Straits Times:
Quote:A 50-year-old Dutch tourist in the Spanish resort of Benidorm was admitted to the hospital when the Viagra he took left him with a 36-hour erection. The man, who had no history of impotency, told doctors he had taken the drug merely to enhance his sexual performance. In Beirut, a Lebanese woman filed assault charges against her husband who took three Viagra pills at once, lost control over himself and savagely attacked her in a state of excitement she said she had never seen in him before. And in Taipeh, a prostitute confessed to killing a 70-year-old client, saying she could not bear his excessive sexual demands after he took two Viagra tablets.
I always say; if you're gonna take 2 Viagra, give your sweetie 2 also.
nah give her 4
then you can lie back with a steel hard monster boner while she does all the work
Okay, I just took a new measurement, and I have a 6 1/8-inch penis. Is that a good size?
Kicky, your inclusion of the 1/8th inch still indicates some insecurity.
I just wanted to be exact, since I was measuring.
That measurement probably has a margin of error of 1/16 or so though. It's tough to do this with a tape measure.
What would 6 and 13/64 indicate?
A slight swelling?
