I don't see how.
You are begging the question this way:
"Hypothetical examples xyx of abuse are worse than this slur, after all people who feel otherwise are hyper-sensitive."
It's circular logic.
In any case, it's your value judgement about what is worse but these slurs are also forbidden on A2K because they insult entire classes of people and it's not just about who is more aggressive to whom. Using these slurs pejoratively in general is itself untoward, putting aside the verbal abuse of a member it is denigration of a whole class of members in specific, protected, classes.
You may disagree with the protected nature of these classes (your racial caricature schtick suggests you might) but they are so for good reason and this has always been a founding principle of this community. The new platform will allow others to make their own. Hell they will be able to start a KKK forum if they so please but this forum does not allow that kind of slur.
But the vicious intent is much more apparent in the second case, to me anyway.
I will have to take your word for it since so far EVERY single person complaining about moderating and saying that there is just much more egregious stuff out there has not told me a single example or even tossed out a general name. I can't be expected to read everyone's posts so not sure what your complaint is, show us the garbage you speak of.
I'm probably in the minority, but I tend to see intent as much more important than the utterance of any particular word, per se.
Well he wasn't suspended for his intent but it was crystal clear and he was repeatedly calling a member he hated a "fag" while throwing in that he was an "idiot" etc. If you have worse examples put up or stop complaining about these hypothetical abuses you chide me for not righting.