So how are YOU today?

Msolga,

Yes, I'm following a diet, but I've yo-yo'd the same 10 lbs one too many times, I fear.

Soz, WOW! That's some dream. Hopefully you get a good night's sleep tonight.

I'm ok today. Less frustrated, less crabby, less wanting to take my frustration out on others. I guess I'm a bit better than ok.

No balcony here I'm afraid! But lovely weather ... it hasnt been under 20 degrees (celsius) in ... forever. Mmmmm...

Yeah, yesterday wasnt so hot. I'd slept badly, was stressed (or rather, very sad) about something, so I wasnt well in my skin when I came to the office, and was consequently totally non-communicative at the lunch/presentation I was sent to, especially also to meet others. So I felt stupid about that, and ... etc.

Today's much nicer tho! A pleasant morning, bought some raspberries, friendly folks, joked around with a charming colleague from down the hall, pleasantly talked with another one I'd not seen before, did waste some precious time by procrastinating on A2K but did also eventually finish my 'homework'; a paper that I in fact finished editing in a nice cafe instead, where I also got to learn two new Hungarian words (I still cant speak ****, but with two new words a day I should get there eventually ...) -- had some salad in a nice and cheap place (to soothe my guilty conscience), went to the Internetcafe where the computers turned out to be down, so instead I chatted with this girl who works there for over an hour (yay) ... ok, so now I just wasted the remainder of the evening squabbling on A2K Politics, but still overall a surprisingly good day, considering! <smiles>

I am sooo relieved I am not the only one who has dreams like that!

The other time I was so perturbed by my dreams that I typed them out here, left links around as well, hoping to get some feedback from others saying, "hey, you know ..." - but instead I must have startled everyone into silence, LOL!

They suck though ... I can empathize. (Got loads of them)

You know Habibi, i once advised you to attempt to take control of your dreams--or at least, described how i had done as much. Since that time, i've come across the term lucid dreaming. A quick web search yeilds many results, and you might benefit from this: Lucid Dreaming FAQ.

Yes, I have successfully used the technique in dream work with repetitive scary dreams of getting the dreamer to move on, ask a question of the attacker, or confront the monster, and find out what the dream is trying to say. Haven't yet managed to dream lucidly though!

I dream a lot, I think, but only retain them if I'm especially unsettled, either by the content of the dream or if my sleep is itself unsettled, especially if I wake up gradually.

Even so, when I read my description, some of the visuals come back, but I've largely forgotten the dream already.

I had an adrenalin overdose though, or something, I've been stuck in fight or flight most of the day. Have to consciously moderate my behavior. A little too quick and jumpy, not so much emotionally as physically. I think I'm barely touching the gas but the car jumps forward, etc.

If I get a good night's sleep it'll be done by tomorrow, already better than it was earlier today.

Yes, I remember that!! I was deeply, deeply impressed, but it sounded like a pretty superhuman achievement! Will look into the link, though ...

Today I am not so good. I'm going to have to start a topic somewhere, soon, because I am lost.

Yes, reminds me (tho a little too late <grins>): a good one to remember is also that spending time on A2K Politics just before you go sleep is a baaaad idea!

Oh, hadn't seen the lucid dreaming exchange -- I think I do that, especially with ones I remember. Note how at the end everyone was safe and together -- I think the initial, unconscious dream was the attack or whatever it was, then I spent the rest of the time saving everyone. Heh.

I just identified another fear in that impressive collection, notice how I was at work when it happened and had to get to sozlet? I'm just starting to work again more steadily and while it's home-based, I know there are fears about separating from sozlet/ not being as close to her because I'm busy.

I bet, nimh!

Grand Duke, haven't seen you for a while. Sorry you're having a hard time.

Yes, do, Grand Duke - it might help to talk about it.

Can we help you to find yourself, Duke? Hope you feel more grounded soon.

Thanks, Clary. I'm off to a late-night party now for some temporary amnesia, but I'll probably end up starting a topic tomorrow. Cheers.

Oooohhh... well, welcome back to the fold, GD. Stick around, we are good for something, you know.

Party at this ungodly hour!? You must be feeling stronger than I do... enjoy it!

Grand Duke - be sure to seek out our help! You're a good guy.

When i was in grammar school, i read in a child's weekly magazine a story of a girl who dreamt she had gone into space with her family, on a colonizing ship. The story goes on and on, and then she is confronted by a situation in which she can save her father or save her brother, but not both. Then the story asks what she should do. Leafing to the back of the magazine, i found the cheesey statement that she should just wake up, reminding the reader that she was dreaming. It was a complete cop-out on the question of the dilemma she faced, and i was disgusted.

However, a few weeks later, i was in the midst of a nightmare when the words "just wake up!" came to me, so that is precisely what i did. For many years thereafter, i was capable of this--for twenty years or more. There was a down side, as well--i once found a fabulous treasure in a dream, and then a voice in my head said something to the effect of "It's only a dream, you don't get to keep it." But the power remained with me for a long, long time. And then my dreams began to change, radically. I would have what i think of as motion picture dreams: i was entirely a spectator, and not a participant, it was as though i were watching a movie. Oftentimes there would be recognizable screen actors in the dreams. I even had dreams which would count as animation, with wee animals as the characters--one was quite impressive, the images having the quality of watercolors, much of it done in pastels.

Eventually, though, i lost the ability to control my dreams, and lost to a great extent the ability to recall my dreams. I think that there is a very crucial function served by dreams, and i was cheating some part of my mind--so the mind found ways to avoid the control. I've not made the attempt again, and gradually, only very slowly, my dreams have "come back," to the extent that i more frequently recall them now.

Saturday morning, almost lunch time..... Dare I hope? Is the worst of this wretched cold over? Yesterday I felt so wobbly had no choice but to be housebound all day: too much A2K, read for a bit, a video viewing (loveactually - nothing too demanding seems possible - even my brain feels fragile!), looking around helplessly at a messy house ... Today, feeling rather revived, I'm fighting this instinct to get stuck into many, many things that need doing! ... Slowly, slowly is the best way!

Nice to see you again, GD. Sorry you're going through a rough patch! Yes, start a thread! You know how helpful & generous with their advice A2Kers are!

No balcony garden anymore, nimh? What a shame, you were getting so good at it!

Sorry you didn't reach your quota, Sozobe!

Your dieting efforts are about to bear fruition, J! I'm feeling very confident about this!

I hope the goddess is smiling on you today, osso. A better day?

Yes, thank you. What a week.

Last week of the gallery and landscape architecture business. A happy enough ending between us business partners, which was good; however, I am horrendously tired of going through my collected goods for what to toss, and packing. The last few days have been heavy book carton cartings, over and over, from work to home, and once home, just where to stack things. Trips to Booklegger's to see if I could sell some books (yes) and trips to Salvation Army to unload the rejects. In the midst of this I heard that my niece's mother died.

Her mother - my ex's brother's ex-wife, has had horrendous problems since I've known her. Complicated story. She was the woman from a village culture in Africa who came to the US and married my bro in law, now years ago. We got to be sort of friends after a dismal start, another story. She talked, I mostly listened, but talked back with her when I could wedge in words - for a number of years, but I eventually couldn't deal with the 3 a.m. rants and stopped answering. Anyway, her death was not unexpected by me, a question of when.

She had been catapulted into a culture she wasn't at all ready to deal with, and I don't think that's her fault. Hard to separate cultural differences, so vast, and personality matters.

My niece is well sick of her mother and not particularly sympathetic to her going and dying the week of her high school graduation. She isn't a callous teen, but has vast reasons for those feelings - and yet I know she has waves of love and missing her.

I'm going down for the funeral, which promises to be quite strange for all of us. And I'll see a bunch of my best friends.
And my accountant, gurgle, I'm soooo bad.

I haven't been to LA since I got breast cancer there on 911.
That was the day I pushed my way into the BC center for a biopsy. What a hell of a day for many of us and a hell of a trip.

I had usually liked going back to LA, up to then, though my visits have always been crammed full of seeing a lot of people over a many mile area, leaving me confused on what I said to whom about what, to some extent. But it always costs me a lot of dollars to go, and I haven't been back in about four years.

This time the trip has limits re stuff going on here in Eureka, and my need to get back for an eye appointment - so I am going to try to get people to come see me instead of my tearing around the metropolitan region, and staying, say, at four houses. We'll see.

So, I'll try to get them to visit me in Venice, and try to use the saved time to hang with my niece.

Oh, yeh, I get to meet my ex's new wife... (I think). Eh, water off a duck's back.