A Western Gathering?

Asher ~ wonderful commentary, thanks

Buterfly ~ we live in a visual society, and there will unfortunately be discrimination shown to all of us on some level, wheather it be age, sex, or god-knows-what. None are exempt from unfair judgement during their lifetime.

In the case of comments by a2k members regarding the pictures from the gathering, I found all the comments to be non offensive nor was anyone excluded from well deserved compliments and good natured bantering.

Once you get to know the members of a2k, their personalities and thoughts,
you'll find a good group of people slow at making unkind judgements, and fast at accepting people for who they are.

Stradee, Don't take yourself too seriously when it comes to looks - nobody else does. Most of us - at our age - either have big guts or big arses, and not a little wrinkle. I even have graying hair. The way I see my looks is simple; I had no choice in the matter; all my ancestors made that choice for me. As for ageing, every time I live another day, I get a day older. I have no control over that either. Acceptance is the key, and don't make it a big deal either to yourself or to others. Heck, I know I'm ugly, but so are most everybody else I know. The most important thing is most people have a beautiful heart. c.i.

I would quite like to respond to Butrflynet, because I think some interesting issues are raised - BUT - I am very aware that some of her initial remarks were very hurtful, and I have no wish to prolong discussion of a topic that I imagine might be difficult for a number of people, including you, Butrflynet - AND I am aware that this thread is actually about people's enjoyment of their gathering, and I have no wish to intrude farther on this.

I wonder if the thread "owners" (those who gethered) might care to let me know if any further discussion would be welcome, or unwelcome?

If I hear nothing, I shall say nothing.

You weren't talking to me, but I for one would love to hear more.

i'd love to see someone try to defend the "sexist" angle. Butrflynet seemed only to take issue with Lola and did not seem to think discussing Blatham was "sexist" nor that those doing so were slack jawed and brainless.

I would LOOOVE to ear more. But then again, I is an ass and have no qualm with such.

Better wait till polite people have a say.

You make many assumptions about what I might wish discuss.

I do. I assume you are going to want to counter my harshness. You frequently do so (which is appreciated by moi).

But the above was just posted because I had not yet noted that the "sexism" was leveled to one side. I did not see any complaints of treating men like sex objects and discussion of the appearance of the men was as predominant as it was of the women.

Gee whiz, let's start a thread on this one. Because I too have lots of thoughts about the misuse of feminist ideas and values. But let's not do it here. I'll go right now and start a new thread and we can have a challenging discussion without putting a halt to this excellent thread here. I'm going there now.

I have a comment of whatever use by myself in wait just because it seemed in excess for the point of the thread. Hope to catch up with you all, including you, butryflynet.

http://www.able2know.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=8144&highlight=

There you go. Let's have at it on this new Thread. Is Physical Appearance Completely Irrelevant?

See you all there.

I didn't mean that as ominously as it sounded, huh, waiting to catch up with you... with some warm croissants and a bit of tea or coffee. Let us go and discuss.

be sure and bring the tea and cookies, Osso

c.i. ~ you are too funny

I said "accepting people for who they are" ~ c.i. Silly.

I should worry or take myselff seriously? I'm gonna be 60 yrs old in a month. My hair isn't gray cause Feria and I have an appointment every 8 weeks or so, my joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service, and my secrets are safe with friends cause thay can't remember them either. I no longer think of speed limits as a challange, and best of all, I quit holding my stomach in no matter who enters the room. My mother and kids think I'm pretty <they're supposed to> but my opinion on the subject is ~ I an't gonna look any better than I do today, and I've learned to be comfortable in my skin.

Acceptance of oneself brings acceptance and consideration for others.

Sending a smooch to your heart ~

stradee

that's a beautiful post

it is indeed.

On posting forums where members in some threads obviously know each other pretty well, and seize many opportunities to tease, I'm still amazed that someone who is not well-known to the folks in this thread was so concerned about the topics of conversation and perceived sexim, ageism, genderism, etc.! If our dismayed Butterfly were to look at the threads of the London Gathering and the Florida gathering, and even the small get-togethers in Texas this last spring, well maybe she'd see the whole context as it would go on in several threads, not just this alone.

In addition, many of the active posters to this thread are long-time members of Lola's Salon, another thread here in a2k. And there are manymembers of a2k that met originally online, elsewhere! It almost seems as if a stranger would siddle up to a few foks talking amongst themselves and then ask for a complete run-down on the whole discussion from the beginning. Hmmmmm - never saw this kind of controversy before in other posting forums. Hmmmmm. Will have to think about this.

cobalt

It is very interesting, isn't it? It has us all reflecting on a bunch of stuff about self and community, and I'm a fan of such opportunities.

As the shmozzle was unfolding yesterday, lola and I were also talking via IM. Being both authors and subjects of some portion of that spark-engendering sequence of events (plus with her great expertise in psychoanalysis and some small familiarity with social phenomena on my part) the whole thing became quite riveting.

Oh, that's just wonderful. Now you've done it, blatham. Everyone on here will be jealous now. The men, because you're getting IMs from Lola, and the women because she's getting them from you. Thanks for making this thread even more complicated.

:wink:

"Complications" adds a little spice.......not too hot, and not cold. c.i.