The Official Semen Thread

Thanks for expending all that energy, Region!
I am reassured. You simply caught my subtle sentiment there to "get my fill of semen"! Wasn't sure anyone would get my little private joke.
..."Idle chatter"! Gus, you're a hoot.
Frankly, if no-one had addressed my statements, I would have fled from this site in humiliation and terror. For sure! Sometimes I may go a bit too far... But hey, I yam what I yam.

Yams with semen are apparently a delicacy in some parts of Micronesia. The yams influence fertility, and the semen dressing is just for good luck. This story could be apocryphal, but I'm 'sticking' by it.

i shot my load there, now i'm spent...



happy now, gus

LMAO!

I bet Jes is happy ;-)

Imagine that. Who would have thought injecting semen into patients' mouths would be deemed unacceptable.

NOT TO MONICA LEWINSKI

Gus, the title to this thread offends me. Could you change it to something more PC, like "The Official Cum Dumpster Thread?"

So I went to Subway for lunch today, because I worship Jared and his giant pants, and the dude says to me, "Hi, I'm Abdul and I am your spunky, funky creamy salad artist. Extra mayo is free." I said "What what what??" "Extra mayo is free," he repeated while apparently looking for loose change in his pocket. I went for a falafel instead. At least tahini has a different colour, so you know what you're getting.

Thanks Joe.

I'm now officially on a hunger strike.

<<eagerly waiting for gus to regale us with juicy tidbits from the movie set...>>

Never ever get spunk in your eye. Burns like hell.

You know, this thread inspired me to make today, July 29th, "National Semen Day."

It's fun!

For instance, today I had the good sex with myself, but didn't clean my hands. Walked out of my room, and upon seeing my roomate, shook his hand. When he looked down in disgust/confusion, I said, "oh, my bad man...I just sneezed and forgot to wash my hands. Sorry!"

About an hour later I left a "deposit" in his shampoo.

Wait...I do this stuff pretty much on a daily basis. Nevermind.

The biker dude and Moosehead


Dearest Gus:

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this debate that has been raging for generations. As always, you presented your response as a true gentleman would.

Drawing from knowledge gained from another debate, the spitters and swallowers may comprise "opposite streams of influence" on the question presented. However, there may be others who may wish to enter the fray. For example, the followers of Emily Post might contend that the recipient should inconspicuously dribble the unwanted contents of one's mouth into a napkin.

(Oh boy. Of course, that brings another ripple into the stream of influence: Should one use a paper napkin readily available at the movie theater concession stand or should one use a cloth napkin for the occasion? I don't even want to go there because the far-left etiquette people and far-right etiquette people will pick up that bone of contention and the debate will surely go on for pages and pages. Please Setanta and OCCOM Bill, will you please kiss and make-up? or at least shake hands?)

From your description of Moosehead (and from the accompanying photo), I can understand why you honor him as an expert authority on this subject. Moosehead's consideration and concern for those around him is most admirable.

Accordingly, another thought provoking question crossed my mind. What would happen if Erik, the very dangerous looking biker with a short temper, tossed a huge friggin' jar of mayo in the porn theater and it shattered right next to Moosehead's shins and splattered creamy white-stuff all over him?

Do you think the aftermath of that event would be friggin' funny for Erik, the biker dude?

Again, I'm just curious. After all, I'm here to learn.

Respectfully yours,
Debra

Edit: I did not intend to imply that ALL the far-left etiquette people and ALL the far-right etiquette people will pick up that bone of contention--I only meant SOME or a FEW or maybe ONE or NONE of them would.

test those boundaries


You are a fine specimen of the female gender who is not afraid to test those boundaries that have confined and oppressed us for generations. Women should not allow the fear of humiliation to prevent us from opening our mouths when we want to.

On the other hand, if my posts go a bit too far, it's probably not even me who wrote those posts. I am quite conservative, soft-spoken, and dainty. (I blush very easily.) But, sometimes my evil twin switches places with me in this forum and pretends to be me. It happens all the time. Of course, you're probably watching Big Brother 5 and have noted the twin-switching team of Adria/Natalie and are aware of the confusion that can create.

I want to clear up the confusion right now because I'm not here to win any prizes through subterfuge. If any of my posts appear to "go a bit too far," then that is probably an indication that I really didn't write them.

Especially if el macho gusto boyo just drank a whole bottle of tequila, heh heh.

I also agree with Debra. Women should never let the fear of humiliation prevent them from opening their mouths when they want to. Word up, sister.

never had the 'tequila shot' however....got me right in the eye once. Damn near took it right out. And the burning.... ...salty bastard....

I'm so sheltered!

I was in a theater recently and had brought a sandwich. I had forgotten the mayo, when suddenly, some came flying out of nowhere and landed on my panini.