35
   

Hospice vs Palliative care

 
 
Phoenix32890
 
  1  
Reply Fri 15 Apr, 2011 04:58 am
@dyslexia,
So there is your closure. Whatever the result, you can be content that you made the effort.
0 Replies
 
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Fri 15 Apr, 2011 06:39 am
@dyslexia,
I'm so glad you took that step.

Hope it pans out for you.
0 Replies
 
mags314772
 
  1  
Reply Fri 15 Apr, 2011 08:44 am
@dyslexia,
Here's hoping you get good news, dys. But even if you don't, you know you did what was right and good. You reached out.
0 Replies
 
JPB
 
  1  
Reply Fri 15 Apr, 2011 08:47 am
I hope you hear back from your ex-wife, at least. She may, or may not, forward your message to your daughter. Unless you get some response you'll never know if your ex-wife has chosen to do what, imo, is the right thing and send your message on to your daughter.

I, too, hope you get a positive outcome.
Tai Chi
 
  1  
Reply Fri 15 Apr, 2011 06:52 pm
@JPB,
I hope your ex forwards your message, and that your daughter will respond.
0 Replies
 
jjorge
 
  4  
Reply Fri 15 Apr, 2011 08:43 pm
Not sure how you're feeling day-to-day dys, but many people have comparatively 'good' days alternating with or interspersed with 'bad' days.

My late fiancee', Jo-Ann and I learned to take one day at a time, hunkering down on the 'bad' days and on the good ones grabbing what gusto we could - a little day trip, dinner out, or whatever was feasible.

We couldn't make big or long-range plans but we took small bites out of the apple when we could.

All the best to you both
0 Replies
 
dyslexia
 
  3  
Reply Sat 16 Apr, 2011 06:47 pm
read an article today about people who have been told they have x time to live and how many/most of them felt a need to atone/apologize for their perceived mis-deeds of their past. I currently feel no such desire. Interesting I think in that changing the deeds of one's past also changes who one is today. I have no desire to change the past because I have no desire to change who I am today.
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Sat 16 Apr, 2011 07:00 pm
@dyslexia,
Good.
0 Replies
 
littlek
 
  1  
Reply Sat 16 Apr, 2011 08:54 pm
Hey Dys, any news back from the hospice caretakers?

I feel sorry for Sara that she hasn't gotten to know you. She's a poorer person for it.
0 Replies
 
Phoenix32890
 
  1  
Reply Sun 17 Apr, 2011 06:56 am
@dyslexia,
Quote:
I think in that changing the deeds of one's past also changes who one is today. I have no desire to change the past because I have no desire to change who I am today.


That you can say that today shows a life well lived.
0 Replies
 
dyslexia
 
  3  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 09:02 am
somewhat of a dilemma, what is the proper protocol for what to wear when you're the center of attention at a cremation? Dark suit? Stetson hat with cowboy boots. white robe? should I avoid wearing any metal? I've tried googling and nothing. Is this a topic people avoid? why? are guests invited or is it like dry cleaning--drop off and pick up on tues? Seems silly to burn up good/new clothing, on the other hand there always seems to be a sale on men's suits. another question, I've never seen a Hallmark card announcing one's cremation, is there a protocol for that too? This is getting all too complicated. At this point in time I'm thinking just my brown Stetson, my good boots over my monkey socks and no announcements. As I understand it, my ashes will be in a plastic bag in a cardboard box not much larger than a shoe box, simply dropped from the Rio Grande Bridge at Taos, probably just Lady Diane and the Hospice therapist but their could be a party at the parking lot on the east side of the bridge, some cold beer and George Dickel bourbon but I imagine noone would show up for that.
Rockhead
 
  1  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 09:08 am
@dyslexia,
you can wear whatever you want.

just know that when they put you in the oven, you will be in a hospital gown that has a big ass gap in the back...

happy trails.
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 09:10 am
@dyslexia,
I've stood at that bridge - very beautiful scenery and a great resting place - whereas you'd get tons of tourists every day Wink
As to the proper protocol for what to wear - I have no idea. Probably something you feel most comfortable with.

I gather you haven't heard back from your ex-wife and your daughter......so sad!
0 Replies
 
roger
 
  1  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 09:11 am
@dyslexia,
It's strictly come-as-you-are. You're not expecting company, or anything like that. What size are the boots?
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 09:32 am
@dyslexia,
I think you wear what you wish...or someone else will choose for you!

Why is there any difference between a cremation and any other funeral?

There isn't here.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  3  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 09:32 am
@dyslexia,
actually - quite a bit of information available on what to wear to your own cremation - but you have to get the details for your own jurisdiction as there are different rules related to environmental concerns in different countries/regions

what I'm seeing most commonly ( I googled "cremation + do's and don'ts" as well as "cremation + clothing" ) is references to light-weight natural fibres - no big belt buckles

People can attend cremations. In some cultures/religions attendance is required. Individual cremation facilities can let you know the details.

want cremation invitations? they're out there

http://rlv.zcache.com/im_so_old_i_dont_buy_green_bananas_invitation-p1610553637883814952diue_152.jpg

http://www.zazzle.ca/cremation_think_outside_the_box_invitation-161272525964747968

http://www.cafepress.ca/+invitations,512866422


~~~~

Don't worry about the after-party, it'll take care of itself and will probably be a good time. I've never been to a bad one.

Listen to the tunes you love. Drink the bourbon. Eat the licorice. Control the good times now.






ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 09:35 am
@dyslexia,
The hospice folks probably have all the info on the local requirements (or will get it for you). You gotta ask them.
0 Replies
 
jjorge
 
  2  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 09:36 am
@ehBeth,
"...Listen to the tunes you love. Drink the bourbon. Eat the licorice. Control the good times now..."
Amen!
0 Replies
 
Roberta
 
  2  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 02:42 pm
Attire for a cremation? Dys, I think you're overthinking things. Why wear anything? Or get wrapped in a flammable, inexpensive shroud. Your wardrobe can go to Goodwill.

Jeez, your discussions depress the hell out of me.

It's against the rules for Jewish people to be cremated, so I don't know much about it. I had a friend who was cremated. Don't know what she wore.

Are flowers blooming yet?
edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Sat 23 Apr, 2011 05:43 pm
My brother got cremated, but I was not in Dallas that day. My sis in law did not volunteer any information about that process.
 

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