True confessions on an insignificant nature

otis, on the other hand, is shaped like a football.

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Our cat's name is Roy and he's not that long but I'm pretty sure he weighs about 48 lbs. We call him Catso.

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@chai2,

OmSigDAVID wrote:

Hi, Roland.

chai2 wrote:

roland's a good boy.

if he lays on a window sill with his front paws stretched in one directions,
and his tail stretched out in another, he's just about 48 inches long.

he's got a loooooooong tail.

Maybe about 7 years ago, I met a turtile in upstate NY.
He was standing on double yellow lines in a road; inauspicious.
He did not mention his name.

His neck was a good 14 inches loooooooooong.
I turned around and parked.
I picked him up by the back of his shell, out of reach of his mouth
and lifted him into a wet irrigation ditch of a farmer's field.

We then parted ways.

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I picked up a tortoise that was in the middle of the highway, and he pissed all over me.

Remember kids, when picking up a tortoise, hold it out at arms length.

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@chai2,

chai2 wrote:

I picked up a tortoise that was in the middle of the highway, and he pissed all over me.

I suspect him of being a liberal.

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It's nearly impossible to tear off one sheet of TP while standing.
'nuff said.

Um. Bounty paper towels in the bathroom folded diagonally.
I sure the word should have something to do with agony.
Paper towels..tender locations..ow ow ow ow .

Oh, here's a confession.
In an emergency of deficient supply, of TP, not Bounty, I have used a nice warm water soaked washcloth.

Joe(Caution: could become an addictive practice.)Nation

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Supplementary Caution: have a plumber standing by.

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@chai2,

chai2 wrote:

I picked up a tortoise that was in the middle of the highway, and he pissed all over me.

Do u think that thay have a different sense of ethics than we do ?

David

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i was so lazy today that I put margarine on my toast because it was by the toaster already. I detest Margarine, have used only butter for 20+ years.

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Sometimes I brush my teeth 4 or 5 times a day. You can say water wastage, but I turn the water off unless I'm wetting or cleaning my tooth brush.

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@Eva,

hmm... a very tiny pecadillo but also a signal that your inner 'Rebel' is trying to get out! :-)

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@chai2,

Don't worry. Only toads will give you warts.

By the way (seriously), you're to be commended for your humanitarianism. I myself (not to mention many others, I'm sure) have picked up turtles that had crawled into the middle of a highway. (And be sure to wash your hands so you won't come down with salmonella.)

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@OmSigDAVID,

Aw, David. That's not being very kind. Laughing

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@chai2,

I NEVER make up my bed. And I don't insist that my wife make it up, either.

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@jjorge,

jjorge wrote:

hmm... a very tiny pecadillo but also a signal that your inner 'Rebel' is trying to get out! :-)

Okay. I should probably let him out more.

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@chai2,

chai2 wrote:

Once in a while, I don't brush my teeth before falling asleep.

Once in a while I do brush my teeth before falling asleep !! Laughing

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@Eva,

Eva wrote:

jjorge wrote:

hmm... a very tiny pecadillo but also a signal that your inner 'Rebel' is trying to get out! :-)

Okay. I should probably let him out more.

your pecadillo?

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@chai2,

MY pecadillo? I have lots of 'em. ...let's see...well, habitually leaving the toilet seat up* is one.

* PS I was always puzzled as to why this enfuriates women so much.
(I know a lot of women drivers who back up without looking behind them)

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@wmwcjr,

wmwcjr wrote:

Aw, David. That's not being very kind.

I am kind to turtiles who stand on double yellow lines.

David

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Once I ate food that I left out all night on my turtle that I hadn't mopped for 8 months and I obviously lived to tell about it. Afterwards I dabbed myself with a piece of tp drawn from the TOP!

Having a basket for the tp, rather than a roller might have saved my marriage. Very Happy

LOL at David saying Hi to Roland following the suggestion that Roland might have a shoe fetish. That made me laugh out loud!

Oh, and hello. I'm Shelley.

<Hi, Shelley.>

When no one is home, I follow the cat around on my hands and knees just to watch how freaked out she gets by me being on the floor on my hands and knees following her around. Then I laugh hysterically.

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True confessions on an insignificant nature

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