Something Terrible Is Happening To Me

Would it be too much to hope for a little détente?

I mean, time just keeps moving on. We are all growing older ... & (one hopes) wiser.

I dunno ... ongoing feuds & bad feelings are kinda pointless.

(Just my two bob's worth ... )

Anyway, apart from anything else, I also really like squinney & I don't know that she'd exactly welcome being discussed on a thread she is not actually participating in. I want to see much more of her around here & I'm concerned that she might be put right off!

hopefully she would be more put off with you treating her like a victim,.,,she can speak for herself, both to her ex mate and to us if she has a problem with what goes on here.

Listen here, hawkeye, I never have, & very seriously doubt I ever will see squinney as a victim!
You are barking up the wrong tree totally!
You haven't a clue.

Super, then don't go driving in her lane...any you are also assuming that her ex would do her wrong, which stinks.

What the ...?

I said something about a person being discussed on a thread she wasn't actually involved in.

What the **** is the matter with you? Can't you read?

Not a problem for me Sglass. I'm healthy, energetic, and have more stamina than most 25 year olds. I'm not boasting.... I work damn hard at it. The only hot flashes I get are from my light show.

Jesus H Christ.... I wasn't trying to , nor am I, talking about squinney behind her back.

This post was about the fact I can't believe I have somehow managed to mature in my judgment a little. It was just a cathartic post thrown out there with a sprinkling of humor (as I do) and now it's a ******* big production.

Drop it everyone please. I have nothing but respect and love for squinney, for the record. There are no bad guys here. We remain good friends.

not attacking you msolga, so please don't misinterpret.

I don't feel attacked by you, Bear.

It was hawkeye's self-serving misinterpretations that got up my nose.

As if another opinion on your life is really needed right now - I think moving so close to Squinney is a bad idea for both of you. It does seem like you used this venue to assure her that you didn't cornhole your overnight guest...and you wouldn't have felt this necessary if you lived somewhere else. I think the close proximity will offer a multitude of opportunities for both of you to have hurt feelings. I know you said the specific location wasn't your plan....I think, in retrospect, you'll both wish you'd waited on a different apt. It's sort of like holding on to "friendships" on public social networks....you start checkiing out who your former loved one is talking to - new men added... and you get a little sick over it - and hurt. Sometimes a clean break - at least until you heal and get your head on straight - is the better choice for you.

I am sorry about this for both of you. Even when break ups are the right thing to do - they are NOT painless - and you are NOT ok yet. Tend to yourself, sweetheart. I hope you feel better soon. It sounds like you may be in a bit of denial right now - you are saying all the right things - but this was your deepest love - and it will not repair this quickly. Trying to repair in the shadow of your former front door is ill-advised. Best wishes!

Well I can't reply that I didn't use this venue for denial purposes or anything like it anymore. Squinney needs no assurance and I would have made THIS POST WERE WE LIVING IN DIFFERENT CITIES. I CERTAINLY REGRET MAKING THE POST IN THE FIRST PLACE NOW. Obviously you folks will assume the worst.

I'm really sorry you feel that way. I think most of the people here really love both of you - and are just putting themselves in your position. Even if my husband and I split amicably and we'd been talking about the possibility of a break up for a long time - I'm sure the reality of it would be so very difficult - and I'd really want him to know I wasn't already screwing if a guy slept on my couch - even if I didn't "owe" that info. If I projected my feelings onto you in error, I sincerely apologise. I'm not assuming the worst...I guess I was assuming you were like me. I don't think badly of you at all.

But I didn't assume the worst either bvth. Why would you giving the ABFTP one be the worst? That's like you're well and truly domesticated. The ABFTP's reputation was risked for nothing and that same domestication is what says that an unchaperoned overnight stay in your pad is reputation destroying. Your admitted failure to perform your obvious duty to her must have led her to question her attractiveness.

It might help bvth if you posted the song list of the gig that night.

Don't mind him. He sees everybody as a victim. Especially himself.

It is, however, sad to see what has become of a longtime and loving relationship.

the point was that I DON'T see Squinney as a victim, dont see a reason for others to see her as a victim, I think that in general treating people like victims by running interference for them when they have not asked for the help is counterproductive and I know that it pisses me off...so I objected.

I am sure that if she indeed enjoys the victim treatment that she will let me know...as I said, she is fully capable of speaking her mind.

That will teach you not to start acting mature again. Or if you do, I'll bet you don't post it. lol

Yeah--maturity isn't what it's cracked up to be.

we have become a very repressed society, where maturity is equated with being good sheep. So, I agree with your statement. A price will be paid by all who refuse to conform.