Hey, Can A Woman "Ask To Get Raped"?

I guess I am lucky they did not take me away that night as it seem that nowadays if a woman cry rape the police are told to believe her but in a possible domestic violence situation they are told not to take the word of the women that everything is fine.

You love this also Hawkeye one of the conditions for domestic violence existing according to the DOJ website is if a man have his partner financially depended on him and control the family money I kid you not.

Types of Emotional Abuse
Emotional abuse can take many forms. Three general patterns of abusive behavior include aggressing, denying, and minimizing.

Aggressing

Aggressive forms of abuse include name-calling, accusing, blaming, threatening, and ordering. Aggressing behaviors are generally direct and obvious. The one-up position the abuser assumes by attempting to judge or invalidate the recipient undermines the equality and autonomy that are essential to healthy adult relationships. This parent-to-child pattern of communication (which is common to all forms of verbal abuse) is most obvious when the abuser takes an aggressive stance.
Aggressive abuse can also take a more indirect form and may even be disguised as “helping.” Criticizing, advising, offering solutions, analyzing, probing, and questioning another person may be a sincere attempt to help. In some instances, however, these behaviors may be an attempt to belittle, control, or demean rather than help. The underlying judgmental “I know best” tone the abuser takes in these situations is inappropriate and creates unequal footing in peer relationships.
Denying

Invalidating seeks to distort or undermine the recipient’s perceptions of their world. Invalidating occurs when the abuser refuses or fails to acknowledge reality. For example, if the recipient confronts the abuser about an incident of name calling, the abuser may insist, “I never said that,” “I don’t know what you’re talking about, “ etc.
Withholding is another form of denying. Withholding includes refusing to listen, refusing to communicate, and emotionally withdrawing as punishment. This is sometimes called the “silent treatment.”
Countering occurs when the abuser views the recipient as an extension of themselves and denies any viewpoints or feelings which differ from their own.
Minimizing

Minimizing is a less extreme form of denial. When minimizing, the abuser may not deny that a particular event occurred, but they question the recipient’s emotional experience or reaction to an event. Statements such as “You’re too sensitive,” “You’re exaggerating,” or “You’re blowing this out of proportion” all suggest that the recipient’s emotions and perceptions are faulty and not to be trusted.
Trivializing, which occurs when the abuser suggests that what you have done or communicated is inconsequential or unimportant, is a more subtle form of minimizing.
Denying and minimizing can be particularly damaging. In addition to lowering self-esteem and creating conflict, the invalidation of reality, feelings, and experiences can eventually lead you to question and mistrust your own perceptions and emotional experience

I am nearly speechless as to how clueless you are....you might want to educate yourself

Police: Ambridge Bartender Raped Unconscious Patron
December 27, 2010

AMBRIDGE, Pa. -- Police said an Ambridge bartender has been charged with raping a female customer after hours who claims she was unconscious and drugged at the time.

James Sumpter, 37, of Ambridge, is charged with rape of an unconscious person and with furnishing alcohol to an intoxicated person. He is being held in the Beaver County Jail awaiting a preliminary hearing Jan. 3.

Police said the owner of the Firehouse Lounge has cooperated in the investigation and that the woman reported the incident shortly after it ended Sunday morning.

The owner said Sumpter has only worked there for a few weeks.

Police said the 47-year-old woman claims she was drugged and raped for about three hours after the bar closed early Sunday.

"The investigation revealed that the assault took place over a several-hour period,” said Officer Zadock Dismuke. “The evidence we obtained showed that it began after the bar closed and continued until about 5 a.m."

Sumpter had nothing to say to Channel 11 News cameras as he was being taken from the Ambridge Police Station.

"Everyone at the bar has been very cooperative with us, the manager, the management,” said Dismuke. “We couldn't ask for anything more. Everybody has been cooperative and that gave us a positive ending to this crime"

Dismuke also said the fact that the alleged victim came forward immediately made it much easier to arrest a suspect.

"We are lucky our victim was very cooperative and adamant about getting this case solved,” he said. “We are happy that we could solve it in a quick amount of time."

Police did not comment on specifically what evidence they discovered, but they said it is very strong and it helped lead them to Sumpter.
http://www.wpxi.com/news/26283569/detail.html?cxntlid=cmg_cntnt_rss

They want women under the control of men. These two guys are both very threatened by women. That's why they attack and demean women, including the women who have posted in this thread.

Elizabeth Smart's courage in trial helps other rape victims, advocates say
By ROSEMARY WINTERS
Salt Lake Tribune

SALT LAKE CITY --When Elizabeth Smart emerged from a federal courthouse in Salt Lake City, she celebrated not only her own triumph but also the possibility of justice for all victims.

Eight years after Brian David Mitchell kidnapped her and subjected her to near-daily rapes, a jury found Mitchell guilty last Friday.

"I am so thrilled to stand before the people of America today,"said Smart, 23, "and give hope to other victims who have not spoken out about what's happened to them."

Advocates for survivors of sexual violence say Smart's willingness to confront her offender under the nation's gaze will help empower other victims and dispel the stigma often associated with rape. Other observers say they have been inspired simply by her courage, poise and strength.

"There is such shame associated with sexual violence, and to have it being talked about so openly and publicly is almost a relief to some,"said Heather Stringfellow, executive director of the Rape Recovery Center in Salt Lake City. Smart "held [Mitchell] accountable, and that's a very powerful message."

Sexual assault victims often fear they won't be believed or that their own behavior will be questioned, said Alana Kindness, executive director of the Utah Coalition Against Sexual Assault.

"I've been really impressed with [Smart's] candor and her ability to express herself and talk openly about her experiences,"Kindness said. "It does give an opportunity for people to see that you can talk about it and that you can talk about it and be supported."

After Smart began her testimony in Mitchell's trial on Nov. 8, detailing her repeated experiences of rape as a 14-year-old girl, the Rape Recovery Center saw a spike in calls and drop-in visits for a two-week period, Stringfellow said.

"I hadn't anticipated the fact that so many people would be triggered by listening to her testimony and reading about the case,"she said. "We've been overwhelmed by calls to our crisis line and people who needed assistance because her experience reminded them of their own."

Mitchell's violence against Smart, an "all-American girl," highlights how tragically common violence against girls and women is, said Theresa Martinez, a sociology professor at the University of Utah.

"The way the family handled it, the way she handled it has given us a vision of healing," Martinez said. Smart "can be a positive role model for young people. If such things are going to happen, people need to understand they can come through such an experience and survive."

Smart and her parents have not been advocates by example alone. Ed Smart has championed the creation of a national alert system for kidnappings and family preparedness to prevent child abductions.

In 2006, Elizabeth Smart and her father lobbied Congress to pass a law to create a national sex-offender registry. She watched President George W. Bush sign the Adam Walsh Child Protection and Safety Act into law.

In 2008, Smart shared her experience and words of encouragement in a booklet published by the U.S. Department of Justice, "You're Not Alone," for survivors of abduction.

Fifteen thousand copies of the pamphlet were published. Nearly half a million digital copies have been downloaded online (http://www.ojjdp.gov/publications/PubAbstract.asp?pubi=244130).

After the verdict, Smart's mother, Lois, spoke of the power of mothers, women and daughters to move forward, leaving their offenders behind.

"It is an exceptionally victorious day for us all,"she said.

Since her abduction, Elizabeth Smart has graduated from high school, studied music at Brigham Young University and soon will return to serving an LDS mission in Paris, France. She has projected a calm and confident demeanor in her public appearances.

Mitchell "could have totally ruined her life. Yet she had the strength to say, 'No. I'm going to define my own life,' " said Kalyn Denny, a Salt Lake City resident and retired teacher who has followed Smart's story. "I can't imagine that any young girl wouldn't be totally in awe of her courage and her determination."
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/living/2013673267_smart14.html

Sexual assault in military 'jaw-dropping,' lawmaker says
July 31, 2008

Ingrid Torres said she was attacked on a U.S. base in Korea: "I was raped while I slept."A congresswoman said Thursday that her "jaw dropped" when military doctors told her that four in 10 women at a veterans hospital reported being sexually assaulted while in the military.

A government report indicates that the numbers could be even higher.

Rep. Jane Harman, D-California, spoke before a House panel investigating the way the military handles reports of sexual assault.

She said she recently visited a Veterans Affairs hospital in the Los Angeles area, where women told her horror stories of being raped in the military.


"My jaw dropped when the doctors told me that 41 percent of the female veterans seen there say they were victims of sexual assault while serving in the military," said Harman, who has long sought better protection of women in the military.

"Twenty-nine percent say they were raped during their military service. They spoke of their continued terror, feelings of helplessness and downward spirals many of their lives have taken since.

"We have an epidemic here," she said. "Women serving in the U.S. military today are more likely to be raped by a fellow soldier than killed by enemy fire in Iraq."

As of July 24, 100 women had died in Iraq, according to the Pentagon.

In 2007, Harman said, only 181 out of 2,212 reports of military sexual assaults, or 8 percent, were referred to courts martial. By comparison, she said, 40 percent of those arrested in the civilian world on such charges are prosecuted.

Defense statistics show that military commanders took unspecified action, which can include anything from punishment to dismissal, in an additional 419 cases.

But when it came time for the military to defend itself, the panel was told that the Pentagon's top official on sexual abuse, Dr. Kaye Whitley, was ordered not to show up despite a subpoena.

"I don't know what you're trying to cover up here, but we're not going to allow it," Rep. Henry Waxman, D-California, said to the Defense official who relayed the news of Whitley's no-show. "This is unacceptable."

Rep. John Tierney, the panel's chairman and a Democrat from Massachusetts, angrily responded, "these actions by the Defense Department are inexplicable."

"The Defense Department appears to be willfully and blatantly advising Dr. Whitley not to comply with a duly authorized congressional subpoena," Tierney said.

An Army official who did testify said the Army takes allegations of sexual abuse extremely seriously.

"Even one sexual assault violates the very essence of what it means to be a soldier, and it's a betrayal of the Army's core values," Lt. Gen. Michael Rochelle said.

The committee also heard from Mary Lauterbach, the mother of Lance Cpl. Maria Lauterbach, a 20-year-old pregnant Marine who was killed in December, allegedly by a fellow Marine.

Mary Lauterbach said her daughter filed a rape claim with the military against Marine Cpl. Cesar Laurean seven months before he was accused of killing her.
http://articles.cnn.com/2008-07-31/us/military.sexabuse_1_sexual-assault-sexual-abuse-military-service?_s=PM:US

ACLU Files Suit For Access To US Military Sexual Assault Records
Tuesday, December 14, 2010

The American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) has alleged that rape and sexual assault are rife in the US military and the Pentagon refuses to make publicly available records exposing the problem, reports the Associated Press.

This allegation and others are contained in a lawsuit filed by the ACLU and other concerned groups in a federal court. The other groups are the Service Women's Action Network (SWAN), the ACLU of Connecticut and Yale Law School students . The suit was filed yesterday in a New Haven court against the departments of Defence and Veterans Affairs.

Former marine captain and executive of the SWAN Anuradha Bhagwati said :” The government's refusal to even take the first step of providing comprehensive and accurate information about the sexual trauma inflicted upon our women and men in uniform ... is all too telling”. She added that :” The DOD and VA should put the interests of service members first and expose information on the extent of sexual trauma in the military to the sanitizing light of day”. The suit says the recorded are needed to aid the understanding of the problem and the step to be taken in addressing it.

A spokesperson for the Department of Defence said they did not comment on pending lawsuits. The Department has said that reports of sexual assault involving military service members as victims or subjects rose 11% to 3,230 in the 2009 reporting year.
http://www.newstime.co.za/WorldNews/ACLU_Files_Suit_For_Access_To_US_Military_Sexual_Assault_Records/16910/

Rape Victims Ask, Military Won’t Tell on Assaults
By Ann Woolner
Dec 16, 2010
Bloomberg Opinion

When a woman volunteers for the U.S. military, she gives up the comfort, safety and freedom of civilian life. This she expects, as do men.

Serving her country shouldn’t mean doubling her likelihood of being sexually assaulted, or, if she is, lowering the chance that the offender will be punished. But that’s what the military means for women, according to the Service Women’s Action Network.

What the Pentagon gives out in the way of this sort of information shows only a slice of reality, says Anuradha Bhagwati, a former Marine and the executive director of the servicewomen’s group, which is based in New York.

Her group has gone to court with its claim that the departments of Defense and Veterans Affairs are stonewalling its request for more data.

A Defense Department press officer, Major Monica Bland, wouldn’t address the litigation specifically but acknowledged the problem.

“Much work remains to be done,” Bland said by e-mail, and “the Department is committed to the goals of preventing sexual assault, increasing reporting, and improving DoD response to the crime.”

The servicewomen’s group puts it this way in its lawsuit: “Sexual assault pervades the ranks of the American military.” The American Civil Liberties Union and its Connecticut chapter are also plaintiffs in the case, filed in federal court in Connecticut.

Records Wanted

They want records, on mistreatment ranging from sexual harassment to rape, that will better reveal the frequency and circumstances, the prosecution of cases and the treatment given victims, who often suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder.

The various branches of the armed forces define, count, track and report incidents differently. Because of that, the annual reports Congress requires of the Defense Department can’t tell the full picture. Letters from the servicewomen’s organization to agencies within Defense and the VA produced few records, so the group filed suit this week.

The idea that members and veterans of the U.S. military would have to go to court to get this information is astounding. Where is Julian Assange when he’s really needed?

Even incomplete, the numbers that are available are disturbing enough.

Surveys in recent years show that roughly one in three servicewomen say they were sexually assaulted during their time in the military. Of those who say they were raped, 14 percent said they were gang-raped, according to a survey reported by the American Journal of Industrial Medicine in 2003.

Fear of Reprisal

As hesitant as sexual-assault victims in civilian life are to report the crime, it’s worse in the military. Fear of reprisal, uncertainty over what will result, and the military structure and mindset all discourage victims from reporting.

Still, either reporting is getting better or sexual predation is getting worse in the services. A Defense Department report released this week shows sexual assaults at the military service academies are up.

And, citing Defense Department figures, the lawsuit says the number of sexual assaults within the armed services rose 73 percent from 2004 to 2006 and 11 percent from 2008 to 2009.

While the government has made it easier for servicemen and servicewomen to get help for post-traumatic stress disorder, the improvements won’t do much to help victims of sexual mistreatment, according to Bhagwati. The veteran with combat- related PTSD no longer has to prove a precise link between his condition and a specific episode. But victims of sexual assault have to show they were assaulted, hard to do in a system where records are often not kept.

Widespread Trauma

And yet, 71 percent of female veterans seeking VA disability benefits for PTSD have been sexually traumatized, says the lawsuit.

Already we know enough to recognize a very serious problem. And it seems to be getting worse, even after high-profile promises to protect service members against sexual predators, increased reporting and more educational programs, and recommendations to standardize reporting and create environments where victims feel safe to report and offenders fear the consequences.

So it’s no surprise that while about 40 percent of those accused of sexual assault in the civilian world get prosecuted, only 8 percent of military sex offenders do.

‘Loses a Stripe’

“Maybe somebody loses a stripe or gets some counseling,” Bhagwati says. “Some are literally transferred out of unit without any written paperwork.”

Consider the case of three enlisted sailors who were discharged from the Navy after the rape of a female midshipman enrolled at Annapolis.

During a cruise with classmates, she and nine other midshipmen left the ship for a party in a sailor’s apartment. The other midshipmen eventually left her behind with three enlisted sailors, at least one of whom raped her, according to the new report on sexual violence at military academies.

The sailors’ punishment was discharge, not civilian prosecution.

Surely the worldwide sex scandal involving some Catholic priests taught that you can’t handle these things internally and let the predator move someplace else to prey on the unaware.

Protecting servicemen and servicewomen from sexual mistreatment, whether harassment, assault or rape, is hard enough when you know precisely what’s going on.

But until there’s enough information to know that, it simply can’t get much better.

And no one signs up for that.
http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2010-12-17/rape-victims-ask-military-won-t-tell-on-crimes-commentary-by-ann-woolner.html

Yes AM my wife is a poor weak woman unlike you with no will of her own even if she happen to have an IQ 40 plus points above yours.

Strange how she could have been the deputy director of a large city/county child welfare department with eight hundreds or so people under her directions.

Yes a proven victim type if I ever hear of one.

PS are you once more getting off on Firefly rapes stories?

Me thinks you hit a pretty raw nerve with old billy boy there. Now he is resorting to calling you vulgar names.

Lots of criminals and nutcases out there that have degrees

And then the jerk brags about his wife, as though that reflects well on him.