@Silverchild79,
Well, Banjo Boy, I guess if that's how you view me, there isn't much I can do about it. Seriously, though, you remind me of the character played by John Voight -- smart and brave, but plagued by inner-conflict. In the end, he does what has to be done, however unpleasant. Under the pressure of intense, lethal conflict, he overcomes the weakness that had always dogged him.