Perhaps you need to make a list of the positives - no matter how short....
What about the trips up north - a whole new are to get involved in?
Is that likely to become more frequent (Miranda permitting!)?
I really know all the positives about my job! When things are going well, I get the same thrill out of it that I imagine artists and performers get.
I was just in a slump.
What I DO think is happening is that cumulative stress is slowly wearing away my defences. I mean, anyone doing these jobs is nuts anyway, and I have been doing it for....gulp...THIRTY YEARS in August!!! Not the exact same job, but it's always been in kind of high trauma areas (not that there's any LOW ones, and I think front line welfare people have a much tougher job) ), and I am kind of a weird personality anyway.
What I mean by that is that I've been resilient enough to cope and not burn out permanently and I maintain enormous energy for learning and developing, but I am ridiculously sensitive and self-punishing, and it is clear that, while I can sort of ameliorate that to some extent, it's not going to go away. This means that when things don't go so well, I can have lots of trouble managing the stress. It really affects my capacity to manage stuff like the paperwork demands.
I'm sort of slowly wearing out. Pretty normal, no?
Also, I get lots more joy out of my job than lots of people do because of the highs, but the lows suck.