Ha, Ha. It's Back! The A2K NFL "Pick-Um" Game!

@realjohnboy,

I've been thinking that Miami will probably win it..

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We here on A2K are split 20-7 in favor of the Jets. The ESPN experts are evenly divided.

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@realjohnboy,

realjohnboy wrote:

Congratulations to Oss0, Cowdoc and Rhyss for getting to the week's final game with records of 12-3.

Oops. I meant 10-3.

1 Reply

While we're waiting for tonight's results, which alas will not include me, here's one for Johnboy. (Honestly there was nowhere else to post this):

Quote:

Three Sensitive Rednecks

Three Rednecks were working up on a cell phone tower: Cooter, Ronnie and Donnie.

As they start their descent, Cooter slips, falls off the tower and is DRT (Dead Right There).

As the ambulance takes the body away, Ronnie says, 'Well, damn, someone should go and tell his wife.'

Donnie says, 'OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it.'

Pretty soon, he comes back carrying a case of Budweiser.

Ronnie says, 'Where did you get that beer, Donnie?'

'Cooter's wife gave it to me,' Ronnie replies.

'Wow, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?'

'Well, not exactly', Donnie says, 'When she answered the door, I said to her, "You must be Cooter's widow".'

She said, 'You must be mistaken, I'm not a widow.'

Then I said, 'I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are.'

(Rednecks Are Good At That Sensitive crap)

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@ossobuco,

J-E-T-S!

Serially, Jets team seems to be pretty organized ansd consistant on defense. However, this Wilcat offense seems to befuddle defenses. Let'd just say sanchez is a tiny bit more experienced than Miami's QB. I think he'll have learned from his last week's bad outing and not make bad throws.

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@realjohnboy,

Right, I counted ten, and figured I'd goofed.

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I am deeply offended, Fox, at your scurrilous attack on rednecks. Your attempt at humor at my expense was totally uncalled for and personally offensive.
In addition, rednecks don't even drink Budweiser! Pabst Blue Ribbon is the brew choice amongst us.
A few years ago, Ronnie, Donnie and Cootie worked for our city's Parks Dept.
One day while I was walking in one of the parks I saw Donnie dig a hole followed by Cootie fill it back in.
"What the hell are yall doing?" I asked. Cootie replied "Ronnie usually plants flowers in the hole, but he's sick today."

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@realjohnboy,

You walked in the parks Johnnie?

What for? I've never been for a walk in a park in my entire life.

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@spendius,

I'll bite.

Really?

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@ossobuco,

Really. Nor anywhere else. I've walked to the pub. But I've never been "for a walk". Walking has to have a purpose for me. Otherwise I prefer to lie down. The economic exigencies stretch my legs quite enough thank you very much.

1 Reply

@realjohnboy,

realjohnboy wrote:

I am deeply offended, Fox, at your scurrilous attack on rednecks. Your attempt at humor at my expense was totally uncalled for and personally offensive.
In addition, rednecks don't even drink Budweiser! Pabst Blue Ribbon is the brew choice amongst us.
A few years ago, Ronnie, Donnie and Cootie worked for our city's Parks Dept.
One day while I was walking in one of the parks I saw Donnie dig a hole followed by Cootie fill it back in.
"What the hell are yall doing?" I asked. Cootie replied "Ronnie usually plants flowers in the hole, but he's sick today."

Well geez, here I post a very nice story of a redneck guy doing a kindness, and you get all offended. I mean it isn't like mentioning that your sister has a "Soldier of Fortune" subscription or that you left Santa Claus a beer and a Slim Jim on Christmas Eve.

But to make amends, and to get back on topic here, I'll point out that Rednecks and football go hand in hand:

Quote:

Two redneck football players were taking an important final exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the Sugar Bowl the following week. After a few multiple choice items, the last question read, "Old MacDonald had a _________."

Bubba was stumped. He had no idea of the answer. He knew he needed to get this one right to be sure he passed. Making sure the professor wasn't watching, he tapped Tiny on the shoulder. "Pssst. Tiny. What's the answer to the last question?"

Tiny laughed. He looked around to make sure the professor hadn't noticed then he turned to Bubba. "Bubba, you're so stupid. Everyone knows Old MacDonald had a farm."

"Oh yeah," said Bubba. "I remember now." He picked up his No. 2 pencil and started to write the answer in the blank. He stopped. Reaching to tap Tiny's shoulder again, he whispered, "Tiny, how do you spell farm?"

"You are really dumb, Bubba. That's so easy. Farm is spelled E-I-E-I-O."

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@spendius,

Ah.
This explains a lot of our differences. I've designed small parks and have colleagues who've arranged big ones. I didn't begin to understand space until I was middle aged, not that I do even now, but once I cottoned on, did begin to understand, the world opened up to me.

I've long noticed the distinction between driving and walking, the differing levels of connection.
I think of your view as a net loss.

On the other hand, I'm a fool about economics.

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@realjohnboy,

realjohnboy wrote:

In addition, rednecks don't even drink Budweiser! Pabst Blue Ribbon is the brew choice amongst us.

A few months back, a friend from back home was in town for a visit, and we met up at a local watering hole. If he's not a redneck, he's definitely "blue collar." In any case, I told him the first round's on me, and I'd buy him whatever he wanted to drink. He ordered: "Lemme have a PBR." The barkeep knew what he wanted, and gave it to him.

I looked at him, and said, "I said you could order whatever you wanted."
He looked at me, and said, "This is what I wanted."

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@Ragman,

How 'bout them F-I-S-H??

1 Reply

@CowDoc,

They had to swim upstream, but they got it done.

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@Foxfyre,

Congratulations to Cowdoc!

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They are hooting and hollering in Salmon, ID, celebrating Cowdoc's 11-3 week.

As a group this was our second worst week. We end at .582 only marginally better then the .551 we suffered in Week #2.
Doing well at 10-4 were MaPorsche, JPB, Fox, Osso, Imur, Rhyss and George. At 9-5 were McGentrix, Tico, Ragman, Fbaezer, Ehbeth and Clubber. At 8-6 were Johnboy, ElStud, Spendius, JPinMilw, Panzade and Mysteryman. Breaking even at 7-7 were Edgar, Liontamerx, Region and Miz Cowdoc. Underwater at 6-8 were Jespah and Wandeljw. And poor Alex went 5-9.
The best ESPN guy matched Cowdoc at 11-3 while the worst expert went 8-6.

We will try this week to get back up to the highwater mark of .751 we reached in Week #4.

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@realjohnboy,

Way to go Cowdoc!

<signed, not the worst expert in Canada>

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On to the standings after Week #5:
1) McGentrix (.737) claims sole possession of 1st after being tied last week;
2) ElStud (.724) drops out of the 1st place tie;
2) Spendius does the same thing;
4) Osso (.711) has a good week after a mediocre one but stays in 4th;
4) Cowdoc jumps all the way up from 12th - impressive;
4) Ehbeth sticks where she was last week;
4) Tico moves up from 7th;
4) Maporsche does the same thing;
9) JPB (.697) climbs 3 spots from 12th;
9) Fox does the same thing;
11) Johnboy (.684) remains where he was last week;
11) Ragman hops up from 12th;
11) Fbaezer does the same thing;
14) JPinMilw (.683) sinks from 6th;
15) Liontamerx (.671) takes a fall from 7th;
15) Clubber rises two notches from 17th;
17) Wandeljw (.658) spirals down from 7th;
18) Rhyss (.645) holds where he was;
18) Panzade climbs from 20th;
18) Imur jumps from 21st;
18) Region slips from 17th;
18) Miz Cowdoc does the same thing;
23) Mysteryman (.605) moves up a rung from 24th;
23) George climbs out the cellar;
25) Jespah (.592) loses ground - falling from 21st;
25) Edgar slips from 24th;
27) Alex (.566) pays for his rough week - dropping from 24th.

The best ESPN expert is at .763 which would be good for 1st. The worst guy there is at .618 which would put him in 23rd.
The season is still young. It doesn't take much of a breakout or breakdown to cause rather dramatic changes in the standings.

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Congrats Cowdoc!!

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Ha, Ha. It's Back! The A2K NFL "Pick-Um" Game!

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