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Today’'s breaking news stories…

 
 
Intrepid
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 10:48 am
Quell the misinformed miscreants who assume that Canada is all wilderness even though at least 3 world class cities exist there. Canadians maintain their sense of humour and polite disposition in the throes of uncensored imisinformation.
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 11:08 am
Redneck's think all foreigners are scary, threatening people who are out to overthrow America. A completely loony redneck would think that Canadians are a threat to the American way of life, when in fact Canadians have a hard time threatening beavers.

A special undercover report:

Canadia is the proper spelling for a country where the people call themselves "Canadians". If the country's name was spelled "Canada," then the people there would call themselves "Canadans." Since they call themselves "Canadians", it's only reasonable to spell the name of their country "Canadia

Canadia is a rich and sparsely-populated country where up to 98% of the citizens have government jobs where they are paid to say "Eh!" all day long.

A2Kanadians could not be reached as they were all in the woods at the beaver's picnic!
0 Replies
 
wandeljw
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 12:04 pm
Seeking Canadian Beaver Sounds Like Fun!
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 12:18 pm
Tryagain voted the number one hot date by readers of Gay Times - Wandel denies poll rigging!
0 Replies
 
Intrepid
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 12:33 pm
Utopia found! It was there all along but many failed to see and recognize it. It is a land called Canada.
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 12:49 pm
Voice of America this week profiles Canada; with this special report:

Why do I Love Canada so much? I'll tell you. I have seven reasons that will make whiny liberals quiver in their faux-fur lined boots.


1. Canada is cold.

Real cold. Too cold for anyone sensible.
But Canadians should prepare for warmer temperatures, since those Godless socialist pinkos will suffer an eternity in Hell.

2. The metric system.

Those Canadians practically invented this "metric" system bullshit. Somehow it's like inches and feet, only it doesn't make any damn sense. And kilometers? Don't even get me started on those.

3. Canada gained independence from England in 1982.

1982! Can you believe that? Practically yesterday. We told those British popinjays to take a hike over 200 years before those Canucks got around to it.

4. Rich people must pay for health care for lazy bums.

Imagine being coerced into paying for health care for undserving lazy scaramouches who sit on the street corner day after day, chugging down a 40oz Mickeys before noon.

5. They have oil.

Come on, Canada. Give us your damn oil. Who do you think makes your cars, anyway? Manitoba isn't exactly Detroit, if you know what I mean.
Don't make us go Iraq on your ass.

6. They speak French.

Okay, I know what you're going to say. "But only Canadians in Quebec speak French!"

Well be that as it may, Canadians still write in French all over the damn place. Street signs, documents, businesses...

7. Draft dodgers.

And this is the big one. Where do you think those America-hating draft dodgers run off to when the going gets tough? You're damn right they go to Canada.

There you have it folks -- seven indisputable reasons Canada is Great. Of course, everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion. But if it's different than mine, it's wrong!
0 Replies
 
Izzie
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 12:58 pm
Worked Up British Popinjays Don Timberlands to Hike to Canadian Border At Earliest Convenience In support of Canadans! T.R.Yagain Spotted Causing Concern to All A2Kers!

Agent Wandel Returning To Duty.
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 02:05 pm
Xeroxed copies of the prosecution case were handed out form the steps of the Portail Judiciaire de La Haye - foreign talk for The Hague Justice Court; based in The Netherlands -

Editor in Chief Harry Post - he is a graduate of the University of Amsterdam and holds a PHD from Queen's University, Kingston, Canada.

Editors: Anna de Vries - For five years, she worked in the fields of event planning and foreign direct investment for the French government in Chicago.

Jebus H. Crips; the French are running the windy city - Patriots to the parados!
0 Replies
 
Jovana
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 02:45 pm
It's judgement day for all eh's until i am constantly with ,,,. Amen.
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 03:10 pm
Yearning for some much needed R & R, Americans should receive
3 weekend days. In future, the corporate world will work from Monday
through Thursday only.
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 03:14 pm
Zones of corporate compliance set up to promote Calamity Jane's radical idea!
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 03:16 pm
Allegiance to promote 3 day weekend is formed and brought before Congress.
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 03:19 pm
Boston votes; Yea! For the plan - A2K to close for three day weekend. Members at a loss as to how to spend the time productively!
0 Replies
 
hamburger
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 03:22 pm
increased pensions and longer vacations to be given all seniors :wink:

and on sunday a chicken in every pot - deboned for seniors Laughing
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 03:39 pm
Consideration is to be given to the issue of an English Dictionary to all non USA A2K members to aid alphabetical lexicon compatibility!
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 03:44 pm
Decreased penion payments and increased alphabet lessons,
has seniors up in arms in Canada.
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 03:49 pm
Exiles flood the A2K offices to sign up for lucrative pension plan and guaranteed Sunday a chicken pot!
0 Replies
 
Izzie
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 03:49 pm
Endorsement of increasing penion payments is taken on by the "Penion A2K Forum" for all seniors.
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 04:00 pm
Doubling of A2K membership expected in the next five minutes - Hamsters on Prozac!
0 Replies
 
Izzie
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Mar, 2008 04:02 pm
Founder of thread in jeopardy as alphabetical lexicon compatibility is obviously a big problem. T.R.Yagain now on Prozac.
0 Replies
 
 

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