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Today’'s breaking news stories…

 
 
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Wed 2 Feb, 2011 03:45 pm
@wandeljw,
Time to celebrate the new year but nothing can be seen beyond the piles of snow. Small children have been lost (hold onto Annie!) and little dogs can only be found via the sound of muffled yapping.
CalamityJane
 
  2  
Reply Wed 2 Feb, 2011 05:40 pm
@jespah,
Upcoming year of the rabbit will be much welcomed after the ferocious year
of the tiger. We should go off to some quiet spot to lick our wounds and get some rest after all the battles of the previous year.

On a lighter note: spring is upon us, if we can trust - yet another animal, the
groundhog.
laughoutlood
 
  2  
Reply Wed 2 Feb, 2011 10:01 pm
@CalamityJane,
VIRTUAL GROUNDHOG

TRYAGAIN BECOMES PREDICTABILITY AS IT BECOMES HIM

Punxsutawney Periodical No. x
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Thu 3 Feb, 2011 06:38 am
@laughoutlood,
wandelj found to be hoarding cocoa. Local authorities are investigating as soon as they can dig out.
wandeljw
 
  2  
Reply Thu 3 Feb, 2011 07:28 am
@jespah,
X-tra conveniences allowed Wandel for the endurance and courage he displayed during Chicago's snowstorm. In comparison, the Boston area really had nothing to complain about.
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Thu 3 Feb, 2011 10:02 am
@wandeljw,
W accidentally dropped from the end of wandeljw's name, thereby rendering the cocoa incident moot. Dubya was unavailble for comment although reliable sources say he finds cocoa to be "yummy".
CalamityJane
 
  2  
Reply Thu 3 Feb, 2011 10:11 am
@jespah,
Yummy should have been the first operative word here....I mean how many
"W" can an alphabet have, right?
Apropos cocoa - it's 44 F here and we're freezing. None of our shabby wood
shacks are built to sustain such cold weather, but hey, all the glamour goes
to poor snowed in Chicago *sigh*
Izzie
 
  2  
Reply Thu 3 Feb, 2011 10:28 am
@CalamityJane,
Zoilism from the Alphabet Police would ordinarily be harsh for Correspondents!

Chicagoan Snow edurance noted and a 'X' sent for good measure Wink
wandeljw
 
  2  
Reply Fri 4 Feb, 2011 10:19 am
@Izzie,
Apparently Tryagain is not aware that we are now in the Year of the Rabbit. He sent me my biweekly paycheck today but wrote Year of the Tiger.
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Fri 4 Feb, 2011 02:02 pm
@wandeljw,
But if it was Year of the Rabbi, oy, you'd be dancing a hora.
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Mon 7 Feb, 2011 09:28 am
Contrary to some reports there appeared to be an equal number of money lenders and repo men huddled in concerned silence outside City Hospital where T R Yagain had been rushed upon learning that the hitherto nom de plume 'Laughoutloud' was in fact a real person. LOL!

Furthermore historical research has revealed that LOL was last seen in Salem, although which witch was which witch has not been established, but from June through September of 1692, nineteen men and women, all having been convicted of witchcraft, were carted to Gallows Hill, a barren slope near Salem Village, for hanging.

Hundreds of others faced accusations of witchcraft; dozens languished in jail for months without trial until the hysteria that swept through Democratic tree huggin' Massachusetts subsided due to the depleted membership of A2K.

Catholics demand Wandels payments be reduced to two checks monthly - Oy vey iz mir! LOL
laughoutlood
 
  1  
Reply Mon 7 Feb, 2011 11:59 pm
@Tryagain,
Ducking-stools and cucking-stools are chairs formerly used for punishment of women. In fact the term cucking-stool derives from wyuen pine ("women's punishment"). They were both instruments of social humiliation and censure, primarily for the offense of scolding or back biting, and less often for sexual offenses like having an illegitimate child or prostitution.

In medieval times, ducking was seen as a foolproof way to establish whether a suspect was a witch. The ducking stools were first used for this purpose but ducking was later inflicted without the chair. In this instance the victim's right thumb was bound to left toe. A rope was attached to her waist and the "witch" was thrown into a river or deep pond. If the "witch" floated it was deemed that she was in league with the devil, rejecting the "baptismal water". If the "witch" drowned she was deemed innocent. This particular method of ducking was also inflicted on the rare occasions when men were accused of witchcraft.

LaughoutLOOD was exonerated whence the case of mistaken identity with LaughoutLOUD was shewn to be an outrageous calumny and vituperative obloquy perpetrated by a person or persons unknown.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cucking_stool
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Tue 8 Feb, 2011 07:00 am
@laughoutlood,
Embarrassing typos blamed on ducks
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Tue 8 Feb, 2011 06:17 pm
For it was said in Ephesians 4:32 -

And be ye kind one to another, tender hearted, forgiving one another -
And so it came to pass as TR Yagain emerged from the ophthalmology clinic he resolved to cease floccinaucinihilipilification hagiology.

Umquhile rhinotillexomania accounted for the amurcous, but now we have a fowl of a entirely different persuasion responsible for droogism on the streets of Salem.

The early Dutch settlers knew: Lood is een scheikundig element met symbool Pb (van het Latijn: plumbum) en atoomnummer 82. Het is een donkergrijs hoofdgroepmetaal.

Laugh out lead was not expected to float.....Hallelujah, thus proved innocent!

Check out our recipe section for hints on cooking with your new *cauldron by our resident chief Calamity-Jane.

*A cauldron or caldron (from earlier cauderon, from Anglo-French, from Latin caldārium hot bath, from calidus warm) is a large metal pot (kettle) for cooking ...
laughoutlood
 
  1  
Reply Tue 8 Feb, 2011 11:07 pm
@Tryagain,
Gee late in, or gelatin to non- wiccans was always a fave addition to the brew.

http://images.media-allrecipes.com/site/allrecipes/area/community/userphoto/small/36959.jpg

Muchly derived from aqueous humour,

The drainage route for aqueous humour flow is first through the posterior chamber, then the narrow space between the posterior iris and the anterior lens, through the pupil to enter the anterior chamber. From there, the aqueous humour exits the eye through the trabecular meshwork into Schlemm's canal .
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Wed 9 Feb, 2011 06:12 am
@laughoutlood,
I suspect that aqueous humor is no laughing matter.
0 Replies
 
Old Goat
 
  1  
Reply Wed 9 Feb, 2011 06:18 am
More than a quarter of British men interrupt sex in order to read text messages, a survey revealed yesterday.

The rest of us may therefore be regarded as hopelessly romantic, but the truth of the matter is that we have simply forgotten to recharge our phones.
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Wed 9 Feb, 2011 06:30 am
@Old Goat,
Just when you think the alphabet is secure, something happens to it.
0 Replies
 
Tryagain
 
  1  
Reply Wed 9 Feb, 2011 07:15 am
Keeping with alphabetical formality? Quelle surprise! P_one _ome.

As it became a fait accompli that poor forgotten 'h' _ad been removed from the dictionary _eralding _ilarious _aecceity.

The result of this lexicon train wreck is that voluptuous members remain beyond reproach. _owever, senior citizen Capra aegagrus _ircus is to receive a 10 minuet time out!
Izzie
 
  1  
Reply Wed 9 Feb, 2011 09:23 am
@Tryagain,
LULLY: [ʒɑ̃batist də lyˈli] - Chief Master of the French Baroque style!

The minuet was usually in binary form, with two sections of usually eight bars each, but the second section eventually expanded, resulting in a kind of ternary form. On a larger scale, two such minuets were often combined, so that the first minuet was followed by a second one, and finally by a repetition of the first. The second (or middle) minuet usually provided some form of contrast, by means of different key and orchestration Shocked

Around Lully's time, it became a common practice to score this section for a trio (such as two oboes and a bassoon!)

Occasionally, the B section will end with a "return" of the opening material from the A section. This is referred to as rounded binary, and is labeled as ABA′. In rounded binary, the beginning of the B section is sometimes referred to as the "bridge", and will usually conclude with a half cadence in the original key. Rounded binary is not to be confused with ternary form, also labeled ABA—the difference being that, in ternary form, the B section contrasts completely with the A material as in, for example, a minuet and trio. Another important difference between the rounded and ternary form is that in rounded binary, when the "A" section returns, it will typically contain only half of the full "A" period, whereas ternary form will end with the full "A" section

NOTED!


Minuet form

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/Capture1-2.jpg

Simple

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/Capture2.jpg

Slow Movement

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/whatever/Capture3.jpg

Australian Correspondent Pirate Dan, after a simple slow minuet to Moonlight Sonata late into the night, sent a text to his wife saying:

"A Neutral|: B A or A' I(->V) Neutral|: V() I = Gone Chopin, (have Liszt), Bach in a Minuet”




 

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