If BPB doesn't want this discussed, then it shouldn't be discussed.
In fact, I believe if ANY member expresses a wish not to have a deeply personal matter of their life discussed on an open internet forum, we should respect that.
And BTW, as another who went through a divorce "ages ago," I can testify that there is no such thing as a simple question when it comes to divorce.
I wish both Squinney and Bear the very best. I consider both of you friends, and you will be in my prayers.
Considering he told my Mom to go to his Myspace website which shows his status as Divorced when we aren't even separated yet and she calls to ask me about it, and he's saving pictures of him with a couple of young pretty girls at one of his gigs and saved it as "Steve in mourning" (posted who knows where and not appearing to be mourning about anything) on my computer in My Pictures when he has two computers of his own, and he is posting about it on another forum and in another place posted about "come help me celebrate my divorce" ...
I wouldn't be too worried about what he finds distateful or deeply personal. He claims he doesn't want to discuss it, then discusses it himself. Obviously, I'm the only one not allowed to talk.
I won't be posting here anymore. Sorry to have brought it up. Thanks for the support.
It looks like my question was answered.
I'm really, really, really sorry, squinney.
But seriously, don't you think it's time for a new screen name? I'm thinking, HotSingleChick.
I like the Bear and Squinney and hope they both weather this storm with a minimal amount of discomfort.
Oh damn!
((((((((Squinney)))))))
Sh¡t!
And hugs, of course!
Montana wrote:Oh damn!
((((((((Squinney)))))))
And the Bear goes hugless?
Hugs to the both of them.
(((((Squinney))))) (((((Bear)))))[/size]
Re the original question:
Some divorces can certainly be for the better. My parents' divorce was definitely for the better. They both ended up a lot happier than they were before and would have been otherwise - and so did we.
But I dont know of any divorce that passes without pain, hurt, and suffering - even if both people do their utmost best to avoid argument. So I think that's why people offer their sympathies. Even should it all turn out to be for the better in the end, the divorce itself is going to be a tough storm to weather.
In that spirit, I'm sorry to hear you'll be going through this. Like so many people here, I'm very fond of both of you - you're both great people. So I wish you both the very best, and all the strength and comfort as you can muster.
They had their good times.
When my brother was going through a divorce, I told him about a story I had seen on A&E or one of those channels about a divorce ceremony. Basically, it was like the wedding, only they were saying their goodbyes. The kids were there, and the two stood in front of the chapel (or wherever) and said their "vows" which were along the lines of "thank you for your companionship, your love through the years, and the children you gave me". Then gave back their rings and the pastor (or whoever) pronounced them friends. Depending on the relationship, of course, this scenario is varying degrees of likely. Still, how nice.
Quote:It looks like my question was answered.
That is the saddest sentence I've read in a long time.
I think soz and the professor are next.
Quote: When my brother was going through a divorce, I told him about a story I had seen on A&E or one of those channels about a divorce ceremony. Basically, it was like the wedding, only they were saying their goodbyes. The kids were there, and the two stood in front of the chapel (or wherever) and said their "vows" which were along the lines of "thank you for your companionship, your love through the years, and the children you gave me". Then gave back their rings and the pastor (or whoever) pronounced them friends. Depending on the relationship, of course, this scenario is varying degrees of likely. Still, how nice.
_________________
Ive gotta say, in all honesty, thats about the stupidest thing Ive heard of. 'Lets go and celebrate all this pain in some public place"
When my fist wife ran out on me, I discovered that the dumpee(namely me)is the quickest to heal and move on. My ex still writes me e-mails as if I even care. Shes shown herself to me (fortunately there were no kids) and I cant imagine that I was even that person at that time who found her attractive. I write back once in a while to let her know that the person she married and dumped is no longer alive, theres an adult occupying the same body.
Talk to us, farmerman. Open up.
Cleanse your soul.
farmerman wrote:Quote: When my brother was going through a divorce, I told him about a story I had seen on A&E or one of those channels about a divorce ceremony. Basically, it was like the wedding, only they were saying their goodbyes. The kids were there, and the two stood in front of the chapel (or wherever) and said their "vows" which were along the lines of "thank you for your companionship, your love through the years, and the children you gave me". Then gave back their rings and the pastor (or whoever) pronounced them friends. Depending on the relationship, of course, this scenario is varying degrees of likely. Still, how nice.
_________________
Ive gotta say, in all honesty, thats about the stupidest thing Ive heard of. 'Lets go and celebrate all this pain in some public place"
When my fist wife ran out on me, I discovered that the dumpee(namely me)is the quickest to heal and move on. My ex still writes me e-mails as if I even care. Shes shown herself to me (fortunately there were no kids) and I cant imagine that I was even that person at that time who found her attractive. I write back once in a while to let her know that the person she married and dumped is no longer alive, theres an adult occupying the same body.
I think the idea is to allow the people to move on -- especially when kids are involved. The wedding ceremony started the whole thing, the divorce ceremony ended it. Like bookends. Sorry if you think that's stupid, but it wasn't my idea (though I don't think it's stupid). But what do I know, I never had a wedding to begin with.
Does this belong on the "tell us something about yourself we don't know" thread, FreeDuck? (You didn't have a big wedding, or you're not married at all...?)
Maybe it does.... I'm legally married, just never had a ceremony. No dress, no bridesmaids, no party, no preacher. Just signed some papers in front of a cleric in a foreign country. I guess I've never cared much for ceremony in general, but I can see how it can be important to mark events in a life.
Is there still a chance for me and you to make some music, freeduck, or does your partner offer you enough that a capybara farmer could be dismissed without too much thought?
