Marty, the movie. Classic...
Whaddya want to do?
On forty year old men, some of my favorite people have been forty year old men, generally speaking.
Generally, yeah. I would agree with that.
this
Quote:Cute brown-eyed brunette with great legs.
must feel like such a loser
she's been not slapping you away for a year
kickycan wrote: I will not ask her out on a date
she offers another guy her number last night and he turns her down
she tells you about the phone number thing - you don't go "well I'd never turn down your number" or anything
putz
<didja at least tell her that the other guy was a loser?>
ossobuco wrote:Marty, the movie. Classic...
Whaddya want to do?
I dunno, whadda You wanna do?
Man, this girl of kicky's must be one hot tomata.
before you leave, tell her you're really looking forward to seeing her when you get back.
build up a little anticipation.
ehBeth wrote:<didja at least tell her that the other guy was a loser?>
Of course I did. I'm not a COMPLETE idiot, ya know.
Weak...weak...weak...
You realize the longer you wait, the worse your chances are, right? Next thing you know, you'll be hearing "you're like my brother." The more you hang out with her without taking it to the next level, the more of a "friend" you become.
Don't worry about the age thing...if it comes up, it comes up. It's only an issue if you make it one. I'd rather try to get somewhere physically first. Draw 'er in a little.
Now...when slappy starts dispensing relationship advice, you KNOW you've reached a point of no return, right?
(Slappy, you know what I mean...)
Get on with it Kicky. We're not going to hold your hand like this for too much longer.
Can I get an AMEN from somebody please?
Ok, she's a bit younger than you...but let's face it you act immature for your age. She does like you or else your own chemistry wouldn't be going haywire, but maybe she only likes you in that "nice older man" sort of way. You have misgivings about the age difference and if it makes you feel uncomfortable you're probably right to have them, but despite being probably a mistake...who cares, why not go for it?
The worst that could happen is you give her an indication of how you feel and she turns you down, then you feel uncomfortable around her every time you see her from now on and it only makes you want her more since she turned you down and then she starts to eat at your thoughts and distract you for months. Meh.
stuh...I'm betting the farm that she won't turn him down.
and besides, in the miniscule chance she does turn him down, that doesn't mean anyone has to feel uncomfortable every time they see each other.
IMO, maybe discomfort the very next time, after that, things go back to normal. I speak from experience. The weird feeling is acknowledged by both, then it's ok, you're over the hump.
This girl must really dig kicky if she's still sending off the vibes after a year.
Kicky,
Dude. Go shake your stuff in Florida. Get yourself all juiced (not with booze, just let go and have fun, but whatever!).
I'm this woman's age and the fact that you are 40? Who cares! If she digs you, she digs you.
The rest is second, third, fourth thoughts.
Sigh. The night and dance sounded wonderful. Very sweet and cute even.
Go Kicky Go.
So is bringing this to the next level only your call, or does she get to vote?
I think you're doing the right thing.
You can't be sure how things will turn out, so play it safe. Infatuation wears off, but unrequited love and regrets over missed chances are forever!
Furthermore, people should always be just like their significant others. Couples with different backgrounds just don't work out. All those sayings about opposites attract and variety being the spice of life are just sayings with no basis in real life.
Finally, a man's better off when nothing can touch him. I mean, who needs joy when it comes with heartache? The tin woodsman never had it so good as when he was all rusted up in the forest.
Like I said, stick with safe. That way you know what to expect, and you've got no worries. Next year will be just the same. And the next... and the next....
Re: I had such a good time last night.
kickycan wrote:There's this girl, you see. For over a year, I've had feelings for her, as she has for me, but we both pretend like there's nothing going on. Nothing concrete has ever happened to tip this thing into becoming any more than a harmless flirtation. Although I want to just grab her and kiss her sometimes, I don't, because I've convinced myself that it would never work between us. I'm pretty sure I'm right about that too, but after last night, I really wish things were different.
We talked and laughed and danced, and there was some touching and hand-holding going on as well. All very innocent, but it was really nice. I even started to get that stupid feeling you get, you know, like when you really like someone and it just makes you feel happy and stupid at the same time when you're around them. Today I can't seem to stop thinking about her. Ah well, eventually I'll get back to my normal self and won't be in this stupid pining mood. What a nice girl though. If only I were good enough for her.
This post just made me smile...this is the BEST feeling. Call her. Just to say hi.
Quote:IMO, maybe discomfort the very next time, after that, things go back to normal. I speak from experience. The weird feeling is acknowledged by both, then it's ok, you're over the hump.
Maybe, maybe not. If they are part of a group and hang out often and she is continually giving off these vibes, then it's probably unintentional...which means that if she turns him down she will continue to give off these vibes to him which might keep giving him hope.
Quote:This girl must really dig kicky if she's still sending off the vibes after a year.
Somehow I missed that part.
Anyway...don't bet the farm before you meet her!
kickycan wrote:Actually, I think you guys have something there. When we first met, I was definitely NOT toning it down, and I think that's when she first started digging me and I started digging her.
This is important!
Quote:And yes, I have definitely been considering just blurting out my age. I have a very strong feeling that if I did that and she didn't fall out of her chair or throw up or run screaming, I'd then feel free to act on my feelings.
Do it. I dunno about blurt, but don't avoid the subject and don't lie.
I can't really see how the age thing would be a problem when she already knows you so well. If you were claiming to be 20 and you were really 16, maybe, but the other way around I think it's more about how you look and act than what year you happened to be born. There isn't such a huge difference between 35 and 40 anyway. (And it's entirely possible she already knows how old you are and you're stressing about nothing.)
stuh, besides the year factor...
why would she be giving off these vibes to kicky and no one else?
false vibes?
if she was giving off faux vibes, other guys would be picking up on it also. Women don't usually send it out to the entire group of guys, unless they aren't a "clean" girl.
Mr. Tea & I hung out with the same group, and I bombarded him with vibe rays. He was oblivious for a long time, just thinking I was friendly. Finally, one of the group, Billy was talking to me and casually dropped in the conversation, "you know, "Peggy" is really smitten with Tea, and he seems to be interested in her" and he cocked an eyebrow, meaning he was sensing my vibes towards him, and maybe I should lay low....I did, he dated "Peggy" for a while....but I waited, patiently, for my chance....POUNCE!
Naw, I'm betting the farm and the tractor on this....she's interested.
Chai wrote:stuh, besides the year factor...
why would she be giving off these vibes to kicky and no one else?
Well funny you should mention that. As I recall on this very evening that kicky described having such a good time with her, she then proceeded to offer her phone number to a different guy. If she were really interested in kicky, why would she go an offer her number to a different guy just a few minutes later?
Who knows, but possibilities include:
1.) She's been sending kicky vibes for a year and nothing is coming of it so she's starting to explore other options.
2.) She was trying to make kicky jealous.
3.) (Very close to #2, but slightly different), she was trying to display to kicky that while HE might not realize how hot she is (as demonstrated by his year-long failure to make any kind of move) there are in fact other people in the world who think she is hot, hel-LO!
Not saying any of those are the truth, but I also don't think that the phone number thing means anything in particular.
