Ack! I'm a 'lady'?!

I dont know anyone who was married at 27...

And most of the long-term relationships my friends were in at 27 (and some of 'em, including mine, were 5+ year affairs) crashed soon after.

The age around 30 seems to (nowadays?) be a time of drastic change & transition, and new starts. Often with new partners too.

So, although that same change & transition fersure tends to come with plenty of heartache and insecuritisation (lord, it seems like pretty much everyone I knew/know went through a crisis between 27 and 33), there's no reason to panic I dont think, Flushd...

You're pretty much part of the pattern. (What was that you said about banal cliches? Mr. Green

)

Also, things are looking good for women between 25-35. I was struck by the stories of women in that age bracket (still) going clubbing a lot and having no problem picking up younger men either. Some kind of change in standards/practice?

(Well, perhaps not in Hungary. But in Holland, anyway.)

I was at my sis's birthday last year, two friends of hers had decided to go clubbing one more time, ok two more times. They're like 36, 37. One of 'em promptly ended up kissing with this guy, turns out to be 25 or something. He didnt blink an eye when he heard. Politely asked how her kid was doing the second time. <grins>

0 Replies

shewolfnm wrote:

I dont want to job hop, bar hop, break up only to make up, break up again.

Thats like, raw lyrics girl! I mean, uh, ma'am...

0 Replies

Well gabe kissed a a girl way into her 30's here and he's 21 he didn't care one bit. I was a little jelous but got over it.

0 Replies

Francis wrote:

Eva wrote:
It makes sense...the more you practice, the better you get.

Amazing thing is that 99% of the men think that sex is a matter where they are innately super talented...

Nah, the best ones are the ones who've a) had some experience, b) have paid attention to what they've experienced and observed and know how to use it, and c) can take that and use it as background to the current experience while learning new things about the current experience.

0 Replies

Little surprised by the reaction to ma'am comments, though that's an american thing right? I was pretty much forced to call my teachers in school miss and sir. If I come across a woman who looks like she means business, ie a certain sense of maturity and responsibility (which is NOT a bad thing, come on) I'm very likely to say miss, be it 25, 35...etc.

I'd probably even use that title for older ladies as well, it's a habit more than anything now, ingrained in me following school. I'd be a bit shocked and embarrassed if I caused offence using Miss. Any title like that is a show of respect IMHO. I can only imagine the sense of self that comes from being 30+ though...

0 Replies

Eva wrote:

Slappy Doo Hoo wrote:
Actually I thought women's sexual peaks were in their 30's, not 40's.

Believe me, Slappy. I've been through both. It's definitely the 40s.

Yup yup, it's the 40's all right! I've never been so freaking horny in my life Laughing

0 Replies

shewolfnm wrote:

Eva wrote:
You "need" to, shewolf? What's that mean?

means -

if sex is tons better in my 40's ,
then i want to skip my 30's and the learning 'curve' it brings
and jump right into the big leagues.

Hey, slow down there girl! You gotta go through the 30's stuff first before you graduate to the 40's "can't get enough" stage ;-)

Trust me, it'll be here before you know it ;-)

0 Replies

that is so true here in South africa you call everyone who is your superior (if you come from a good background) miss/mam and sir. it must be a commonwealth thing.

0 Replies

Montana wrote:

shewolfnm wrote:
Eva wrote:
You "need" to, shewolf? What's that mean?

means -

if sex is tons better in my 40's ,
then i want to skip my 30's and the learning 'curve' it brings
and jump right into the big leagues.

Hey, slow down there girl! You gotta go through the 30's stuff first before you graduate to the 40's "can't get enough" stage ;-)

Trust me, it'll be here before you know it ;-)

And then, too, there are those of us finding that the 30s are the "can't get enough" stage. Hmmm, I may have to retire early if this increases in the next decade. ;-) And nooooo, you don't want to skip the learning curve - ever heard of knowledge for knowledge's sake? The learning experience is its own reward!

0 Replies

Buckle up Mystery Girl, because you're in for the ride of your life :-D

Just make sure you drink lots of water to keep yourself hydrated ;-)

Oh by the way, I have much more energy now than I had in my 30's ;-)

0 Replies

Montana wrote:

Buckle up Mystery Girl, because you're in for the ride of your life :-D

Just make sure you drink lots of water to keep yourself hydrated ;-)

Oh by the way, I have much more energy now than I had in my 30's ;-)

Wow, all of a sudden the spring in my step just got really...bouncy! Very Happy

Now...where's my water bottle?

0 Replies

You go girl ;-)

0 Replies

Thank you, all you wonderful people. I am a little stunned at how many replies are here! I am not complaining...

I appreciate all the info, insight, comforting words, and sharing. A2K served as a stand-in confession booth last night. I really needed to get it off my chest and out there. Feels much better to at least have a better sense of the big picture.

I've been taking myself a lil too seriously lately. Going into 'dissolve' mode. There have been so many changes, big ones, so fast, I need to deal with some old wounds. Old wounds I need to take care of.

And. I. Need. To. Have. Some. More. Fun.!
Silly stuff.
Whatever-I-Feel_like_doing stuff.

See what happens.

Oh......And I'm loving the what time and experience does for sex. :wink:
That is one part I KNOW will be great no matter how old I get.

Spring is in the air. Everybody is horny as hell.
Laughing

Great time for change.

0 Replies

Speaking of chest... what did you think of my observation?

It would make sense to me that the reduction surgery would also reduce the number of eyes-sproinging-out-of-heads double-take kind of attention you might be used to.

Meanwhile, yeah, spring is a niiiiice time of year.

0 Replies

Yeah yeah, now you're talkin :-D

0 Replies

Francis wrote:

Eva wrote:
It makes sense...the more you practice, the better you get.

Amazing thing is that 99% of the men think that sex is a matter where they are innately super talented...

Isn't that the truth!

(I guess we oughta stop telling them that, huh? Laughing

)

0 Replies

Montana, you probably have more energy now because you were chasing your child around during your 30s!

Shewolf...no, no, no...you cannot skip your 30s. Don't you know that would kill you? You hafta build up slowly or you'll explode. Wouldn't want that to happen...

0 Replies

That's a good point, Eva. I never even thought of that.

0 Replies

yeah soz, that definetly factors into it.
I thought I was fine with it. Mainly, it has been nice to not get the obnoxious type of oogling, but it does cut down on the amount of pure attention I get. It is a bit tough at a time when my I already feel rejected. This is the whole part where issues/old wounds come in. The ex knew me before during and after big changes i made; including my surgury. I really do feel like my heart has been ripped out, and I am feeling like *i am not good enough as a person*. Back in the day, I filled that up with flirting partying and sex. Old habits die hard; even though I don't want anything to do with getting back into my old lifestyle, it feels like a kick in the face to be where i am at.
I'm not 100% sure what I'm going to do, but something has to be done. This is justt he tip of the iceburg. My whole life seems wrong.

thanks, and sorry for being such a downer. it's just a difficult time for me right now.

0 Replies

flushd- I can certainly understand what you are going through. The world is relating to you in a different manner than it did in the past, and you are not quite comfortable with it yet.

I had the opposite experience when I was in my middle twenties. When I was divorced, I lost a lot of weight, and bleached my hair dead white. (The color was popular it the time). Guys who would not have given me a second look, all of a sudden were surrounding me, and you know what? I hated it. I resented the attentions of the guys were giving me. It all felt so............superficial. I was the same person when I was heavier, and had brown hair, and NOW they were flocking around. Phooey.

The point that I am making was that your surgery brought not only a physical change, but a change in how you relate to the world, and how it relates to you. It is going to take you time to feel comfortable with the "new you".

0 Replies

Ack! I'm a 'lady'?!

Related Topics

Quick Links

My Account

able2know