Advice from women?

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I've noticed that there a lot fo threads that ask for advice on how to meet women, and I notice that most of the people supplying the advice are men, so I'm interested, what do women think are effective tactics in netting a lady? What would you say to a person who wants advice on how to get YOU?

I wonder if this advice will co-incide with what the guys say.

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I'd say the most important things are honesty, being yourself, and being considerate.

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Momma Angel wrote:

I'd say the most important things are honesty, being yourself, and being considerate.

See? Right away I get something which is, in some ways, the exact opposite of what I hear from the guys, who say that you need to hide away your "wimpy" side, drip confidence, and generally not care about anyone else.

Of course, one might argue that saying "be yourself" is another way to say "be confident" but what if that's not how a person naturally is?

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Have you seen this, Perplexed? It starts out with the male perspective, but then there is plenty of female perspective as in goes on.

http://www.able2know.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=70322

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Yes I did, that's actually what got me thinking about this subject.

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Perplexed,

It's a delicate balance sometimes, I know. But, if you are yourself, the way you really are the majority of the time, then this is what women want. I don't think any of us expect a man to be just like we want him to be all the time.

Once you start being something you are not, then it becomes work trying to stay that way. Just be you. From what I have seen of you on these threads so far, you are a nice and considerate person. A fine start IMO.

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Momma Angel wrote:

Perplexed,

It's a delicate balance sometimes, I know. But, if you are yourself, the way you really are the majority of the time, then this is what women want. I don't think any of us expect a man to be just like we want him to be all the time.

Once you start being something you are not, then it becomes work trying to stay that way. Just be you. From what I have seen of you on these threads so far, you are a nice and considerate person. A fine start IMO.

hehe, thanks. Embarrassed

I admit I'm terribly unsuccessful with women, but let's try to keep up a veneer of this thread NOT being about me, okay?

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No problem. So, this friend of yours......... :wink:

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hehe, no no, we're disspassionately interested in teh differences between the advice that guys give other guys, and the advice girls would give to those same guys.

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Quote:

what do women think are effective tactics in netting a lady?

Perplexed- Tactics? Netting?

Are we talking about developing a relationship with a woman. or catching a fish? If you are having problems in this area, you might want to think about how you perceive it!

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Phoenix32890 wrote:

Quote:
what do women think are effective tactics in netting a lady?

Perplexed- Tactics? Netting?

Are we talking about developing a relationship with a woman. or catching a fish? If you are having problems in this area, you might want to think about how you perceive it!

hehe, I was just using colorful euphemism! I'm the most romantic guy you ever met (in my own head) so don't worry about that, it's just euphemism (my favorite way to use language) and I certainly don't mean it literally (although I should probably check that bear trap I put on the sidewalk outside my home)

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Or, if humor doesn't work, I'm sorry, I should have said something like "what would be the most effective way to initiate a romantic exchange between two people, who are equal despite differences of sex, and both fully worthy of respect?"

Or if this second joke doesn't work, then I really am sorry.

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Actually Perplexed, Phoenix is probably one you should give great weight to what she says. She will not steer you wrong.

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I wasn't saying that I don't give weight to what she says, just that she should be careful not to put too much weight in what I say!

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LOL. It's easy to get off track, isn't it? ROFL!

Actually, the way you stated in that last post probably would get you more serious replies, don't you think? :wink:

And, how was Phoenix to know you meant it as a euphemism or a joke? It's tough not talking face to face sometimes, isn't it? Laughing

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Perplexed-OK, chill out. I'm not gonna cut your head off.

IMO, the best way is to show a sincere interest in the person.
Strike a reasonable balance between talking about yourself, and listening to what she has to say. Use compliments, but don't overdo it.

Try to find out what the two of you have in common, and concentrate on those areas. Be honest in your interactions. If you say that you are going to do something, do it. Women like reliability in a man. Keep your sense of humor, even when things may not always go smoothly.

I'll think of some more, and will be back!

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Perplexed wrote:

I wasn't saying that I don't give weight to what she says, just that she should be careful not to put too much weight in what I say!

Are you saying that you should not be taken seriously? Hmmm............

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You're certainly full of criticism today! Is it because I was tough on you and lash in S&R? She seemed to take it well.

Seriously though,my idiolect is a weird one, and lots of people have trouble understanding me, I understand, but let's just try and stick to the subject.

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Phoenix32890 wrote:

Perplexed-OK, chill out. I'm not gonna cut your head off.

...

I'll think of some more, and will be back!

Well I'm glad you're taking this as easily as I am, that way there's no need for conflict!

And yes, once you get to know me, you can tell when I'm saying something completely out of character just to be funny, and when I'm being serious. Until then just keep your easy-going attitude and everything should be fine.

Maybe my weird articulate-inarticulate-ness, my idiolect, is part of my problem.

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Momma Angel wrote:

Perplexed,

It's a delicate balance sometimes, I know. But, if you are yourself, the way you really are the majority of the time, then this is what women want. I don't think any of us expect a man to be just like we want him to be all the time.

Once you start being something you are not, then it becomes work trying to stay that way. Just be you. From what I have seen of you on these threads so far, you are a nice and considerate person. A fine start IMO.

I agree completely with this. I've been involved with some men who I thought were the greatest guys you could ever meet and then after they had me hook, line, and sinker, their true selves surfaced and they turned out to be the biggest jerks. It's the most disapointing thing to find out that the person you fell for wasn't that person after all.
I am all for being yourself and being honest right from the start.
If you pretend to be someone you're not (lie), then the relationship will never work because it started being based on a lie, so the trust goes out the window.
Without trust, there is no relationship.

What if you meet the woman of your dreams and she dumps you after finding out that the relationship was based on a lie.

Women are not pieces of meat waiting to be marinated and far too many men treat us that way, in my opinion.

If you're looking for a serious relationship, be honest and be yourself and if you're just looking to get laid, be honest about that too, so the woman at least knows where she stands.

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