FraCtuRed FliCks IV: Merging Titles

Nightmare on a streetcar named Dave

A bunch of kids in New Orleans have a dream about a scary guy who looks like the president.

Okay -- that's a great start.

Jaws, The Amityville Horror- Documentary about how taxes on Long Island are eating up residents' income.

The Pianist Taxi Driver- Musician takes day job.

Strangers on a Train Kill Bill- Angry subway riders stomp man who won't turn down his boom box.

A Christmas Story Before Sunset- Tale of frantic last minute shoppers.

The Squid and Orca, the Killer Whale

A man reflects on his parents' divorce as they are eaten by Shamu.

Eaten by Shamu? Ewww

It's a Wonderful Life, Psycho- Story of man who lived for fifty years in a psychiatric hospital.

All About Eve Singin' in the Rain- Musical spectacular about first woman in the Bible, and her reaction to April showers.

The Shining Sin City- Story of new gambling and prostitution mecca whose buildings are all made of reflective aluminum.

Touch of Evil on the Waterfront- A gang boss extorts shipping companies.

Those are very good -- don't we have some more, gang?


The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill But Came Down a Brokeback Mountain

Two English cartographers visit the small South Wales village of Ffynnon Garw, to measure what is claimed to be the "first mountain inside of Wales." Turns out it's only a hill but the two cartographers end up falling in love with each other, proving you can make a mountain out of a pole hill.

The Cool Hand That Rocks Cradle Around the Clock

A guy in prison babysits for a teacher with a large jazz collection.

Ali, The Greatest Story Ever Told

Well, he always said he was the greatest.

Oh, great, now I have the image in my head of Max Von Sydow in boxing shorts and gloves. Yikes!

The Matrix in Translation

Listless, middle-aged hacker takes the red pill - and ends up being taken on a weird, terrifying and exhilerating journey through the parallel world of Tokyo by a dream-like Scarlett Johansson.

Down by the Spotless Mind

Three prisoners agree to have the experimental prison clinic psychiatrist erase their memories. At the last moment they have second thoughts and escape. On their quixotic escape trek through the Louisiana swamps, they find it ever harder to find their way out together, as their memories of the other are being erased.

Stranger than Paris, Texas

An immigrant Texan wanders out of the desert with no sense of where he's from anymore, improvising a loser Texan life. His cousin, fresh from Hungary, finds him and pulls his memory back to his background. Torn by guilt, he reunites his cousin with the grandmother whom he had treated so badly. In the end he flies off into the night on a plane back to Budapest.

Abbott and Costello Meets Barry Lyndon

The goofy twosome find a time machine just lying about in an old attic and take a trip back to 18th Century England where they end up tagging along with Barry Lyndon, and they all end up in a coffee table book.

Dirty Dancing with American Werewolves

A morose tale of one man's bond with native american tango dancers driven to extinction by supernatural beasts.

My Own Private Ryan's Daughter

A gay narcoleptic soldier's daughter has a road trip in World War II Ireland

The Thin Red Planet of The Apes

A bunch of Marines travel in time and space to fight future apes on Mars.

The Ugly American President

-- also known as -- There's Something About Richard Nixon

The Shining Deep Blue Sea

Jack Nicholson makes mince meat out of super hybrid sharks.

american pi

horny mathematics students try to calculate the bra size of foreign exchange student, to 100 decimal places

"this one summer at maths camp i stuck a slide rule....."

Oh, no!