Can berating other members be bad for A2k?

Of course you can make such a statement.

But I think, after 23 posts and just four days here, you surely don't know many members and have a lack of "inside view" re those, who know others already since a couple of years and/or personally.

Re: Can berating other members be bad for A2k?
crayon851

I am not sure you can really call it a community in the traditional sense of the word as there is no "face" interaction. It is also very easy to ignore and avoid without emotional impact, something much harder in a live "face" community.

Having said that however, the definitions of "insulting", "berating" ,"snide comments", "destroying", etc. need to be very well clarified and if they are truly such, then potential problems can arise.

To start please give some a goodly portion of "insulting", "berating" ,"snide comments", "destroying" examples.

Why? Because as it stands, your assertions may have validity, but they not supported by any facts presented here.

Walter stole my post. A2K isn't an anonymous chat room. Veteran posters like Walter and I could probably identify dozens, if not hundreds, of posters by writing style alone, without the benefit of either moniker or avatar. This is a very real community where people really get to know each other. Hell, dozens of us, from all over the world will be meeting in person in Chicago in May. Just like real life; tensions can lead to bad feelings and worse behavior.

While there are exceptionally polite posters, like Walter, who you'll likely never see post anything like what you are describing, most of us are prone to misbehaving occasionally. Those who do so as a way of life don't usually last too long as the moderators eventually ban them from the site. The political threads cover such volatile topics, it is almost inevitable that fierce disagreements will sometimes lead to offensive contentions. Interestingly, most complainants are on opposite sides of the political spectrum from those they consider offensive. One man's childish waste of space is another's comrade in arms. The moderators an exceptionally good, thankless job, so its usually best to just leave it to them.

As for ruining the site, no, no permanent damage will be done or it would have ceased to exist a long, long time ago. Contrarily, it is probably the most successful site of its kind and is hands down the best place to find intelligent conversation and debate that I've ever seen.

Even bashing can occasionally be accepted :wink:

Says the fuzzy little Frenchman. Are you coming to Chicago Francis? One half of the French couple I told you about who entertained me all night at the restaurant (Romain, not Pome) may make it as he's currently a student at Northwestern. If so, I'll gladly share some delicious wine with you (from Alexander Valley California of course :wink:)

I think that A2K shines out as one of the most honest and caring forums on the internet. I have had a quick browse at some others and see language and blatant venomous attacks that you just wouldn't see here.

The temperature hots up a bit on certain threads, but when someone is called an arse, there is normally the back up evidence to justify the statement, or a flow of reponses to tell the name caller that he/she was out of order.

I would say that you sit back and read your way through several dozen threads, in order to familiarise yourself with the characters of various posters, before making any judgements.

If I ever had a serious problem and was after support or answers, this is definitely one place that I would come to for help. The Mods here do a wonderful job, and I hope A2K survives well into the future.

We can share that, Bill, as it could be the least common denominator for a beginning.

I'll only know if I'm coming to Chicago three weeks before the meeting...

Can berating other members be bad for A2k?
Don't worry, crayon851. It hasn't been very long since I've become a member, here. But to me, most of the people here are friendly, especially if we maintain ourselves well. Still, I've discovered that all the carefully thought-out words in the world will not be appreciated by some. This negative barrel of bad apples of course isn't exclusive to A2K, but are a natural part of any setting.

I've had a wonderful time here. Out of all the people I've interacted with, only a handful have been blatantly cruel and unjust. For example, it was only within the past few hours that for the first time, I slightly lost my composure because of it. But I then caught myself and said good-night. I noticed that if I tactfully commented about an important issue, I was terribly lashed at, and told that I had an "attitude" or "no backbone" and needed to "grow up and get over it" because this was "only the Internet", and was further informed that this was no longer the old A2K which was for the weak. Then one of them called me a name after I left. Some of these individuals, incidentally, were long-standing members..

Please don't misunderstand, though. I'm not complaining because these are only a handful of posters. I love being here, and have met some great people - highly intelligent and talented, to say the least... with good hearts, as well.

My point is, try to focus on the positive ones and not the negative. Being as diplomatic and open-minded as possible on issues will reduce (but not eliminate) undue dissention. As for myself, I can be passionate, but I take every measure possible to avoid fighting. I don't like it, and I don't want any part of it. It's up to you how you handle it, but I bow out of it as soon as possible. Life is too beautiful and precious to spend it in strife.

It's up to us to take the lead and handle it with care, so that we don't become manipulated.

In all sincerity, it warms my heart to think of the friends I've made, here, and the friendly welcome I've received, including the gracious ones on this thread. Likewise, Crayon851, I extend my best to you, and hope you'll find this community to be a worthwhile place to belong.

Re: Can berating other members be bad for A2k?
[quote="PoetSeductress"

In all sincerity, it warms my heart to think of the friends I've made, here, and the friendly welcome I've received, including the gracious ones on this thread. Likewise, Crayon851, I extend my best to you, and hope you'll find this community to be a worthwhile place to belong.[/quote]

Ditto.

A2K is my favorite forum I have found. Even when I've been a jerk to someone, often times that same person will understand and turn around and offer a hand when needed.
I've seen acts of kindness here that have literally made me cry.
I have found beautiful qualities in every single person here who has stuck around.

This place is strong, and I thank you Crayon for giving me a chance to reflect on that.
I'm grateful for this place.

Crayon is crying because he/she came here, laughed at the topic of a thread of mine, and then asked how old we are here. Several members, such as Dys and Phoenix, laughed and joked about the age thing. Then i pointed out that the age comment was witless, and took the rest of this new member's post apart--which wasn't difficult. Crayon has been crying about being insulted and attacked ever since.

It's out of control on A2K. So I've just stopped trying to be serious too. From now on, the gloves are off baby. If someone says something stupid, they are going to hear about it from me.

Another pouting customer hear from . . .

Most of those feeling picked on usually are hyper sensitive from disagreeing with the supposed attacker, and most often initiate the sniping that ensues.

Someone is always picking on me and I'm sooooo sensitive. I try to be strong though because there are so many here that I like, but sometimes I just need a hug and a good cry.

No pouting here. It's just the internet for crap sakes!

Bite me, you fish-swillin' pea-brained Bear . . . Squinney's gone and Bear's horny, Squinney's gone and Bear's horny . . .

now THAT hurts....

Well ya know I am more than willing to give you a hug any time...of course it would require some changes on your part...the crying has to stop!

Is that a roll of dimes in your pocket?