If you really want to know, you figure it out.
Do you have any idea what you could do with that kind of knowledge?
Lord it over you.
Why do garage doors have springs?
So you can wash your car.
Don't you have to be stupid to ask stupid questions?
Even the most intelligent people say the stupidest things
Didn't Forest Gump say "stupid is as stupid does"?
No .. Tom Hanks did.
Can rubbing alcohol clean a mirror?
You can rub the alcohol all you want, but it ain't gonna clean the mirror
Why go people take the hair of the dog that bit them?
Because they do. You should know by now it is the first step of making a new hair shirt.
Why are some words such as read pronounced different ways?
They aren't pronounced different ways.They are spelled the same way.
Why aren't women in charge of society?
They are ... the question is: Why won't you admit it?
Is it true that what goes up must come down?
Depends on whether you overdose on viagra.
Why do ducks fly in formation?
So you will be able to askd stupid questions.
Is there any reason why traffic signals can't be polka dotted?
It's because they would look like your bikini and we would all crash into them.
Do you think I should redecorate the library?
Yeah. Maybe you could start by dusting the shelves and actually getting some books.
Why is red supposed to mean STOP?
Because green means go.
Is what goes on in your mind writing on the wall?
No- it's spraypaint graffiti on the wall.
If England is closer to me than the Sun, how come I can see the Sun but I can't see England from here?
That actually IS England you're seeing. It's image is reflected back to Earth on a huge mirror strategically positioned in space.
Is it possible that everything that is lost will one day be found?
Yes, but you will not be able to find the person who found it
Why do blackboards make a screeching sound?
They don't, but your fingernails do.
Does the squeaky wheel always get greased?
No, that's why they are squeaky. Sheeesh!
Is it wrong to wear plaid to a wedding?
Not in Arkansas, as long as the colors complement the shotgun.
Why is there air?
