Because sitting, stewing in a car gives you a head rush.
Did you hear about the dyslexic man walked into a bra?
Was he looking to have a cocktail?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Because it would be terrible to get sick right before you die.
Why do people wash their dishes and then put them in the dishwasher?
Cuz ppl get temporary amnesia and forget that they washed it
Why does it hurt when I pee?
try not banging into the back of the toilet before starting
How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?
Depends entirely on the size of the head of the pin.
Why don't all umbrellas open with the push of a button?
Economics obviously.
Why do dogs bark?
Because God had already used the meow when he made cats.
Why are diamonds measured in carrots?
Because they are dangled in front of the ladies as enticement.
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
mice have rights to you know
Where does my crap go after I flushed it down the toilet?
McDonald's. You don't want to know the rest.
Is Pluto a planet?
No, isn't it a gumby doll?
Why is 'mooning' called mooning?
Cuz some sick-minded guy (hehe it has to be a guy) thought the bum cheeks looks like to moons placed side by side a black hole
Why am I alive?
Because your mama didn't abort you...
(sorry! sounds awful, doesn't it??)
Why don't top sheets have fitted corners on one end?
Makes for a quick getaway
Why do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters?
Because bank pens are worth their weight in gold on the Black Market (Ebay).
Who's Zed?
Zeds dead baby, Zeds dead.
Why is an accident called a wreck and when your driving crazy they say its Wreck-Less?
Actually, so long as you're driving, it's always wreckless until you have an accident.
(Nice pickup, shari. :wink: "Bring out the Gimp.")
Since toast always falls butter side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you put put a slice of buttered bread on a cat's back?
You've got a furry piece of bread and a dead cat.
<thanks :wink: , one of my faves.>
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck?
7.8 grams (hey, you asked)
Did dinosaurs sing?
