Am I a paedophile

Someone--I think Mills--used the phrase, the clinical definition of pedophilia. This can't refer to some physiologically grounded behavioral problem, like schizophrenia. There are too many cutures around the world that find young girls attractive and marriaglible at puberty. But it might be argued, I suppose, that in OUR culture (and everyone lives within the constraining parameters of a culture) the restrictions against sex with people under 18 years of age are SO strong that anyone who feels compelled to violate those restrictions IS suffering from some kind of "clinical" problem.

I'm with the wabbit on the issue of what is or what is not normal in matters of human sexuality--insofaras concerns feelings . . . as opposed to actions. I'd suggest that a morbid but not altogether mentally unhealthy fascination were the root cause.

Of more significance to me would be the objectification of people as sexual objects. Fishin' speaks of seeing women in their twenties and mistaking them for teenagers. Even when i know women with a very young look to be in their twenties, i find them incredibly boring. I could not imagine twenty minutes of sustainable conversation with them, let alone an entire evening. Which leads us to Miss Wabbit's remarks about feeding one's fantasies. So long as you see women not as persons, but as sexual objects, the danger of acting upon an obsession grows with the strength of the morbid fascination. See them as each a real and individually personable human being, and you begin to remove the danger, and increase the likelihood that YOU will act your age.

It is no normal to be attracted by a child of 11 years, sincerely.

I want to make a constructive critic but it is difficult when we talk about children. I could believe (why not) you wouldn´t like to have a sexual encounter with this kind of person, but I focus it that you woulnd´t dare for legal aftermaths because if you are attracted by them it´s for a sexual instinct. I think you could have a problem and you should solve it.

The mere fact that there are other men who have the same likings doesn´t justify anything. Maybe your education can counteract your sexual instincts and that it´s good.
You could be a paedophile. But, of course, I can be wrong.

Priamus, Welcome to A2K. I read a book once that was written from the viewpoint of a man who was attracted to young girls. In the end, he decided it was because he never felt comfortable with women his own age, and that problem intensified. That may be what you are experiencing. Don't label yourself just yet. Try going out with someone older than you. I think you will find that may alleviate the problems.

borealace: are we talking prepubescent young girls or sexually mature young girls? The former is problematic and the latter is simply biology. I've seen twelve year olds with the bodies of eighteen year olds and twenty year olds who looked like they just got out of junior high. If you're a sexually healthy heterosexual male, then it's only natural to experience varying degrees of attraction to sexually mature females. Cognitively knowing the female is underage doesn't change her status as sexually mature; though, of course, said knowledge should put the brakes on any further consideration of the subject as a potential sexual partner.

Let's try to remember that sexual maturity (i.e., the development of secondary sexual characteristics and the ability to procreate) is an objective biological fact while "underage" is a subjective social construct. Less than a hundred years ago (hell, less than thirty years ago depending on what part of the country we're talking about) it was perfectly acceptable for a man in his late twenties or early thirties to marry a girl in her early teens. In some states today the age of consent is still as low as fourteen.

If you're attracted to an eleven year old who looks like a child, then that's problematic (this is even abnormal among most other mammals except in times of great environmental stress); if you're attracted to an eleven year old who looks like an adult, then you're suffering from nothing more than biology. However, if you can't keep your attraction in check and act in accord with social norms and law, then you suffer from a lack of impulse control and that's problematic.

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Although I will never act upon the attraction, am I normal for feeling like this?

That's now. Just remember that it's difficult to transgress societal rules the first time, the second time is a bit easier, the third easier still and so on. Get professional counselling now. Do it before you succumb. I'm not being judgemental, I'm being practical. I'm not going to label you as anything, that's not at all helpful but do ask for professional advice. And do it now.

There is a big diffrence between finding another human being ( no matter the age ) sexually attractive and finding them sexual game.

I think many of us don't realize that kids, particular girls, are sexually maturing physically at a much earlier age than they have since such data has been recorded.

the first post in this thread just doesn't make any sense. either you are attracted to them or not, you can't be definitively very attracted to them and definitively not very attracted to them at the same time. you just need to make sense. and your first post does not make ANY sense

ok so whats the problem i like and don't like a lot of things at the same time. i don't see anything to debate here.

why does he want to talk about it though? lots of people like and dislike things at the same time and it isn't a problem. i just don't see any issue here.