The Not So Big "O"

You are such a bad man . . .

I had a orgrasim once't . . . scared the bejeebus outta me . . . i was alone . . .

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I never had sex, so never had faked it. Though it feels good doing myself.
Laughing

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If you men wana be good in bed, just lick or touch the button.

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I faked orgasms with my first husband sometimes. He was so lousy in bed that it was the fastest way to get him to stop!

That was a long time ago, though. I've never had to do it since.

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ConstitutionalGirl wrote:

I never had sex, so never had faked it. Though it feels good doing myself.

Careful, CG.

Every time you masturbate, god kills a kitten...

http://img137.echo.cx/img137/521/godkills9eg.jpg

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When I was younger I would fake it in order not to hurt the guy's feelings and get to go to sleep. Now if it's not going to happen I just admit it. A few times in my now multi-year relationship, my partner has admitted he couldn't release - no big deal. Sometimes you pop, sometimes you don't.

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I'm reading this thread, but apart from that, no comment.

What did you do to make yourself talk to your again, Lord Ellpus?

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So I still assume you all can read and only males have voted on the poll?

If so, no funny stories from it?

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Slappy Doo Hoo wrote:

So I still assume you all can read and only males have voted on the poll?

If so, no funny stories from it?

You mean you missed the one about Baldimo and Autofellation ?

That was a screamer.

Oh wait, I just made that up.

Sorry.

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oh, Lion's funny today... Laughing

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I am one of those that have faked. After a long night of drinking I brought a girl home. The first time was long and was enough for me but she wanted more so she woke my little buddy up. After about a half an hour I knew I wasn't going to go the distance so I thought to myself if they can fake it why can't I? So I built it up, "let go", and was able to finally pass out. It's nothing I have made a habit of but in this instance it worked like a charm.

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pragmatic wrote:

I'm reading this thread, but apart from that, no comment.

What did you do to make yourself talk to your again, Lord Ellpus?

I took myself out shopping, bought myself some shoes, and when I got home I presented myself with a box of chocolates and treated myself to a pampering.

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I'm almost afraid to know what letter is missing from "pmpering"

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ConstitutionalGirl wrote:

If you men wana be good in bed, just lick or touch the button.

I dont touch the button any more. There you are, just getting to an exciting bit, touch the button and whoosh, the footballs no longer on and you're watching the cooking channel. Hours of touching the button later, you finally get back to the Football, only to discover that you've missed a rather splendid goal.

As for licking, one should never lick a TV set, the static shock could loosen a filling.

The Not So Big "O"

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