Am I really homosexual? Discuss.

Reply Wed 30 Aug, 2017 05:51 am
I'm a guy, and I've noticed that I like other men more than women. I like women of course, I've always felt a deep sense of camaraderie with them, just that, I don't like them romantically or sexually, besides my personality and most women's personalities are not very compatible for a romantic relationship. I'd say I'm bi, but for every one woman I feel romantically attracted to, there are 100 men.

Problem is, the few men I've been attracted to have all ended up in a strange disaster. To quote one example, I was once very head over heels in love with a boy. Then the rosy tinted glasses fell off after a couple of months, and I jut felt repelled by him for almost no reason. I thought it was because well, he was handsome, but he wasn't really smart, you know? I think I only fell for his looks. Isn't that lust, not love?

Another case in point is, I'm confused, because all my homo-relationships all end with one night stands. I haven't had many but it's just the way it is. It's like... I collect them, I'm not really interested in them. Is this just my male animal instinct for dominating other men? Doesn't sound like true love, does it? Don't get me wrong, it certainly does feel like love, but my actions and feelings don't add up.

Could it be my brain? A lot of people, both men and women, who know me intellectually always say that I have a 'well rounded brain.' A brain both masculine and feminine. Now don't shoot me, but I've always thought that my homosexuality was nurture. My father was abusive emotionally and sometimes physically. In my opinion, there are two types of homosexuals- nurtured and natured. Natural homosexuals are really born that way, whereas nurtured homos (like I suspect that I am) are so because they had a traumatic life experience.

But then, why do I feel so attracted to men more so than women? Lust? Dominance? Or am I really a real homo, only I'm messed up? I can't be myself around a woman once our relationship status is 'bf/gf', but then a lot of my homosexual attractions have been so.... whirlwind? Would like some real, honest answers. Thank you.
Reply Wed 30 Aug, 2017 06:11 am
I dunno.

But I do know this much - you are basing your beliefs on a truly small and self-selected sample size. If you continue picking up guys and having casual sex with them and not trying to get to know them first, then your homosexual experience will be that of one-night stands.

If you spend time with men, go on dates and all of that before sleeping with them, you may find you get something more out of it.

Also, PS your sexuality can be understood and defined without you having experienced true love at all.
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Reply Wed 30 Aug, 2017 06:16 am
Your issue is not whether you are bi, homo or heter - or anything else. The issue is that you are unable to commit or trust others (or yourself) enough to have a long term relationship.

Because of the childhood trauma, counseling might help you sort out all these issues. When parents let us down, we carry those hurts into our adult lives.

You won't be able to really love anyone until you get this resolved.

Good luck. Don't grow old and end up alone.
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Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2017 04:36 pm
honestly, homosexuality has been around since the beginning of time.. and when it boils down to it, the heart knows what the heart wants.
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