I think my wife is having a affair

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My wife spends her time on Facebook with other single men chatting and is always putting me down to them on there,she is always secretive with her phone and every time i try to talk to her about it she loses her temper and turns it around on me and makes it my fault. I really can't talk to her about it ,i have found proof of her being on dating website and she denies it saying her ex husband did it to mess with her . But the email linked to the website is hers . We are never intimate, she is always finding a excuse to not be . Her friends have told me recently that she was very unfaithful to her previous husband with multiple men and that she is very good at covering her tracks . I cant really talk to her without it being a huge figbt ,i dont know what to do, her conversations on Facebook are always deleted but i have seen her on messenger. Any advice ????

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Type: Question • Score: 13 • Views: 1,403 • Replies: 9

[+3] - jespah - 07/22/2017Actually, they are kind of in an in-between area (I should have been clearer about that). They can be used for stalking and also for abuse, more particularly to spy on victims trying to Google a...

@Abluecollarguy,

If you need some sort of definitive proof before taking any action, throw a GPS tracker on the car and go catch her in the act. Otherwise, she sounds kind of terrible, is there a reason you are still with her?

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@Abluecollarguy,

Or you can have some fun with this.

Contact a guy on Facebook from your city. Make sure he's an attractive guy. Ask him if he would be willing to help you catch your wife cheating. Have him chat her up for a few days then see if she would be interested in an afternoon hook up.

Then you go with him with your phone camera on and confront her. Boom, evidence and certainty. Case closed.

It'll hurt but at least you'll have proof and the motivation to send her packing so you can move on.

I apologise if the way I presented this seemed heartless toward your predicament. If she is cheating, I hope you catch her.

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@Abluecollarguy,

Is she talking to them on a home computer or just on her phone? If it's a computer, put a program on it that will show you what sites she has been on and when. I also agree with the GPS idea and show up there to see if she is with a man, If you're not comfortable with that then I would call around and get a PI to follow her and get the proof you need. I believe in trust and normally don't think you should invade privacy; however, I also think if she is cheating you need to know for sure, have the proof, and divorce her. I am sure she will cry and make excuses but since you have found out that she did this to her previous husband, you need to realize that is who she is (a cheater) and she will never change. Good luck.

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@Abluecollarguy,

If you think so then talk to her and solve your problem. talking is the proper way to solve your problem.

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@Abluecollarguy,

Ok talking is not going to work . There is software that you can download to log every keystoke she does on the computer and apps you can download to track her phone . But if she isn't having sex with you she is getting it somewhere . And if you are still having problems finding out for sure you could just pack her stuff and set it on the lawn and tell her it's over . Yes it will hurt but better to hurt than to drive yourself crazy and and depression will take over after a while and you don't need that . Throw her out and find someone else . Who know her friend that told you that may really care about you .

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@niceguy47460,

Keyloggers are illegal.

If someone doesn't want to talk to their spouse, they may as well just end the marriage, rather than paying thieves for keylogger software and destroying any self-respect they've got.

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@jespah,

Jespah, you generally offer super good guidance, BUT... Smile

How are keyloggers illegal?

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@tibbleinparadise,

Actually, they are kind of in an in-between area (I should have been clearer about that). They can be used for stalking and also for abuse, more particularly to spy on victims trying to Google a way to leave.

I don't think they have specifically been outlawed, at least not in the US, but it would not surprise me if that was coming. After all, they are a handy way of grabbing someone's bank account information and could facilitate identity theft. There's also the privacy angle. While employers may be installing them more and more on company software, that doesn't mean it isn't invading employees' privacy.

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@Abluecollarguy,

It sounds like you are in an abusive relationship. Obviously the cheating is a big worry, but starting arguments and then making it to be your fault will wear you out and scuttle any hope for peace of mind. Some people will suck all the joy and life out of you, and it sounds like your wife is one of those people.

My first husband gradually isolated me until I felt like a total zero......some part of me thought I should stay because 'i loved him'.....but the longer it went on I realized I no longer had any respect for him, I couldn't live with a man I couldn't respect. But that was me, I felt a huge weight lifted when I finally escaped that abusive bully Abusive bully's can also be women.....

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I think my wife is having a affair

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