An "Ask Auntie Lowan" Digression.

Hapless in Kiama looking in!

Happless New Year!

Yesterday morning, I underwent a virtual scanning colonoscopy.

The nurse/technician on hand sympathetically alerted me that there might be some discomfort during the procedure.

I asked her if she might consider putting on soft music and lighting some candles.

Should medicaire cover the extra costs?

blatham wrote:

Yesterday morning, I underwent a virtual scanning colonoscopy.

The nurse/technician on hand sympathetically alerted me that there might be some discomfort during the procedure.

I asked her if she might consider putting on soft music and lighting some candles.

Should medicaire cover the extra costs?

Soiunds as though YOU should be paying Medicare.....I believe you are the first person in history to turn a virtual scanning colonoscopy into a sexual experience.


Not that there's anything wrong with that.....



This is a true story:

At the hospital I worked for ages ago, there was a trainee obstetrician known for his extremely inept, in fact brutal, vaginal examinations.


A friend of mine, then a midwife there (known to her family as the very spit of her paternal great-aunt in Italy, whose nick-name was Auntie Musolini) took him on, when complaints to the consultant obstetricians and gentle chidings by other midwives had had no effect.


She told him flatly that he WOULD observe certain normal procedures re comfort, and that any nurse attending his examinations would stop any VE he performed badly by walking out....(there has to be a nurse in attendance at such things) and would report him to the Medical Board.


He apparently stroked his chin for a moment, and said....but won't the women then confuse it with a sexual experience?

dlowan wrote:

blatham wrote:

Yesterday morning, I underwent a virtual scanning colonoscopy.

The nurse/technician on hand sympathetically alerted me that there might be some discomfort during the procedure.

I asked her if she might consider putting on soft music and lighting some candles.

Should medicaire cover the extra costs?

Soiunds as though YOU should be paying Medicare.....I believe you are the first person in history to turn a virtual scanning colonoscopy into a sexual experience.


Not that there's anything wrong with that.....



This is a true story:

At the hospital I worked for ages ago, there was a trainee obstetrician known for his extremely inept, in fact brutal, vaginal examinations.


A friend of mine, then a midwife there (known to her family as the very spit of her paternal great-aunt in Italy, whose nick-name was Auntie Musolini) took him on, when complaints to the consultant obstetricians and gentle chidings by other midwives had had no effect.


She told him flatly that he WOULD observe certain normal procedures re comfort, and that any nurse attending his examinations would stop any VE he performed badly by walking out....(there has to be a nurse in attendance at such things) and would report him to the Medical Board.


He apparently stroked his chin for a moment, and said....but won't the women then confuse it with a sexual experience?

and your point is?

dyslexia wrote:

dlowan wrote:

blatham wrote:

Yesterday morning, I underwent a virtual scanning colonoscopy.

The nurse/technician on hand sympathetically alerted me that there might be some discomfort during the procedure.

I asked her if she might consider putting on soft music and lighting some candles.

Should medicaire cover the extra costs?

Soiunds as though YOU should be paying Medicare.....I believe you are the first person in history to turn a virtual scanning colonoscopy into a sexual experience.


Not that there's anything wrong with that.....



This is a true story:

At the hospital I worked for ages ago, there was a trainee obstetrician known for his extremely inept, in fact brutal, vaginal examinations.


A friend of mine, then a midwife there (known to her family as the very spit of her paternal great-aunt in Italy, whose nick-name was Auntie Musolini) took him on, when complaints to the consultant obstetricians and gentle chidings by other midwives had had no effect.


She told him flatly that he WOULD observe certain normal procedures re comfort, and that any nurse attending his examinations would stop any VE he performed badly by walking out....(there has to be a nurse in attendance at such things) and would report him to the Medical Board.


He apparently stroked his chin for a moment, and said....but won't the women then confuse it with a sexual experience?

and your point is?

You're a fine one to be asking for a point!!!!!




And it wasn't so much a point as a stream of associative consciousness, relating to people who see medical procedures as possible sexual experiences.

dlowan wrote:

dyslexia wrote:

dlowan wrote:

blatham wrote:

Yesterday morning, I underwent a virtual scanning colonoscopy.

The nurse/technician on hand sympathetically alerted me that there might be some discomfort during the procedure.

I asked her if she might consider putting on soft music and lighting some candles.

Should medicaire cover the extra costs?

Soiunds as though YOU should be paying Medicare.....I believe you are the first person in history to turn a virtual scanning colonoscopy into a sexual experience.


Not that there's anything wrong with that.....



This is a true story:

At the hospital I worked for ages ago, there was a trainee obstetrician known for his extremely inept, in fact brutal, vaginal examinations.


A friend of mine, then a midwife there (known to her family as the very spit of her paternal great-aunt in Italy, whose nick-name was Auntie Musolini) took him on, when complaints to the consultant obstetricians and gentle chidings by other midwives had had no effect.


She told him flatly that he WOULD observe certain normal procedures re comfort, and that any nurse attending his examinations would stop any VE he performed badly by walking out....(there has to be a nurse in attendance at such things) and would report him to the Medical Board.


He apparently stroked his chin for a moment, and said....but won't the women then confuse it with a sexual experience?

and your point is?

You're a fine one to be asking for a point!!!!!




And it wasn't so much a point as a stream of associative consciousness, relating to people who see medical procedures as possible sexual experiences.

You'd have to wonder about that fellow's own sexual experiences?

margo wrote:

dlowan wrote:

dyslexia wrote:

dlowan wrote:

blatham wrote:

Yesterday morning, I underwent a virtual scanning colonoscopy.

The nurse/technician on hand sympathetically alerted me that there might be some discomfort during the procedure.

I asked her if she might consider putting on soft music and lighting some candles.

Should medicaire cover the extra costs?

Soiunds as though YOU should be paying Medicare.....I believe you are the first person in history to turn a virtual scanning colonoscopy into a sexual experience.


Not that there's anything wrong with that.....



This is a true story:

At the hospital I worked for ages ago, there was a trainee obstetrician known for his extremely inept, in fact brutal, vaginal examinations.


A friend of mine, then a midwife there (known to her family as the very spit of her paternal great-aunt in Italy, whose nick-name was Auntie Musolini) took him on, when complaints to the consultant obstetricians and gentle chidings by other midwives had had no effect.


She told him flatly that he WOULD observe certain normal procedures re comfort, and that any nurse attending his examinations would stop any VE he performed badly by walking out....(there has to be a nurse in attendance at such things) and would report him to the Medical Board.


He apparently stroked his chin for a moment, and said....but won't the women then confuse it with a sexual experience?

and your point is?

You're a fine one to be asking for a point!!!!!




And it wasn't so much a point as a stream of associative consciousness, relating to people who see medical procedures as possible sexual experiences.

You'd have to wonder about that fellow's own sexual experiences?

I have my doubts about a number of obstetricians......as a group I have found them to have a great liking for power and control.


Mind you, my experiences working with them are many years ago now....the current bunch may be very different.


The fellow of whom I spoke, however, was a very strange man indeed.

dlowan wrote:

margo wrote:

dlowan wrote:

dyslexia wrote:

dlowan wrote:

blatham wrote:

Yesterday morning, I underwent a virtual scanning colonoscopy.

The nurse/technician on hand sympathetically alerted me that there might be some discomfort during the procedure.

I asked her if she might consider putting on soft music and lighting some candles.

Should medicaire cover the extra costs?

Soiunds as though YOU should be paying Medicare.....I believe you are the first person in history to turn a virtual scanning colonoscopy into a sexual experience.


Not that there's anything wrong with that.....



This is a true story:

At the hospital I worked for ages ago, there was a trainee obstetrician known for his extremely inept, in fact brutal, vaginal examinations.


A friend of mine, then a midwife there (known to her family as the very spit of her paternal great-aunt in Italy, whose nick-name was Auntie Musolini) took him on, when complaints to the consultant obstetricians and gentle chidings by other midwives had had no effect.


She told him flatly that he WOULD observe certain normal procedures re comfort, and that any nurse attending his examinations would stop any VE he performed badly by walking out....(there has to be a nurse in attendance at such things) and would report him to the Medical Board.


He apparently stroked his chin for a moment, and said....but won't the women then confuse it with a sexual experience?

and your point is?

You're a fine one to be asking for a point!!!!!




And it wasn't so much a point as a stream of associative consciousness, relating to people who see medical procedures as possible sexual experiences.

You'd have to wonder about that fellow's own sexual experiences?

I have my doubts about a number of obstetricians......as a group I have found them to have a great liking for power and control.


Mind you, my experiences working with them are many years ago now....the current bunch may be very different.


The fellow of whom I spoke, however, was a very strange man indeed.

I suspect you're right!

You have to wonder about someone who decides it's time for a chat - when you're lying on the operating table with your legs in stirrups???

My god! I hadn't even considered that possibility.

The maiden could pat her tummy and, with practice, add syncopated warbles and chirps or even, depending on the accoustic properties of the instrument, a suggestion of accompanyment by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir off somewhere.

You have a creative mind there, deb.

Black humour abounds in mumpads office but only aongst the staff.

Its good when they deal with alzhimers sufferers.

You only need to learn one joke and tell the same one each day.

I do; I do: I do!

margo wrote:

I do; I do: I do!

If you did, youi wouldn't remember!!!!

Im writing a letter to president Reagan.