Neverending Rap Battle

So you want Prof to learn how to use his tongue?
You better mind yours, before it rolls up with the clapper and puts one through your lungs
With that freestyle, you're fit to get licked
like cunnilingus, I'm a cunning linguist
Watch how I spit this ****, from under my lingua
and I don't have to speak in tongues, to tell you to watch your lip
before someone tears out the oral fissure
You know that they say, speak or forever hold your peace
**** peace, you might as well fold your teeth
and swallow your pridefulness, please
before you get tonsillitis with ease
Either that, or end up biting your cheek, 'cause sheisty emcees
like you tend to bite off more stuff than you chew
And that, brother, is true - and it just sucks for you
Our styles leave your teeth on edge
The things you use to eat are on a ledge
They look like they're about, to fall out, of your mouth
and make you look like you got knocked the **** out
by someone armed to the teeth with clout
Like they rammed a motherfucking fist down the hatch
and put a stitch on your yap
That's what you get when you snap and don't zip up your trap
like a bitch who's on crack

You arent on par with me ,i see through. The illusion
Its not too hard to see the **** you spit is pollution
No confusion but ill break your neck for practice
Better yet im drastic
And make the conclusion of this rap your casket
The fact is Your style is basic
Lets face it you never made it
So make fun of my style
i'll
just re create it
Meanwhile your style sounds like a repeated playlist (bars)
Ills...is this the answer you seek
Your a loser thats remembered as weak
Abuse yours members to sleep
Man your genders a sheep
Ill shave a w deep
Into your troublesome feet
A cumbersome deed
Cuz im giving you too much Ls to keep (bars)

Dam sam but i agree to your claims
Ima king of this land people think im insane
But every kingdom has a disaster
So before i grab Your head and shove it in plaster
You should realize you feel like an irrelevant rapper
See im a master just showing my teachings
It dont matter your takin this beating
Just so we all know what your reading
Please respond back to catch a L by this evening LMAO

You just said you'd break my neck? For your sake, I hope it's true, buddy pal
I'm already disabled, so the joke's on you, little clown
Whether you do do such thing, dude, that move just won't count
Because you'll only make me SNAP and put a foot in your mouth
Catch a beatdown with my sole, my boots have got clout
Even your bruises will have holes on them too, no doubt
I'll be using you for a footwear, you'll be hella bent
**** samyboy, your new stage name will be Edelman
And I think you're getting too big for your shoes
Even the sneakers that you wear have stupid wigs on them too
I would make fun of your style, but there's no fun in it
Because all you do is bore me with the same dumb lyrics
They're just uninteresting, and ******* irrelevant
They suck, they're unintelligent, and I'm just sick to ******* death of it
You make me go into bloody hysterics the way you bust your messages
like they constitute some essentialness
They're just weapons to seek some public attentiveness
because your erections aren't getting enough tenseness
And this has been a problem since you popped the wrong medicines
so now you've become more repressed in some sexual sense
Man, it must be horrible to possess such strong sentiments
that get so hard in the core of your head that
it feels like your cortex is being compressed by the force of distress it gets
Not distress, I meant pressure
Sorry, I was overreacting, I just did that for extra measure

I'm hideous, that's why people treat me like I'm piteous
They want to be RID of a DICK like moi, it's ri-dick-ulous
I'm inconspicuous, out of the ordinary
like a news reporter farting on a live commentary
Call the coronary, because my autism's cautionary
I'm warning all of you fairies who all want to get lairy
My balls are all hairy, but on the contrary
I don't give a ****, a hoot or a port of sherry
So drink to me, gentlemen, you British chaps and chappies
Wearing Union Jack nappies with a laugh, slap-happy
Tally-ho, pip pop, and a glass of shandy
or perhaps you laddies want a large decanter of brandy
While I rap this week, these geeks have some glasses handy
I'm crapping out of my anus, while my ass is flabby
like tubs of jelly, stuck in my stomach, I've a chubby belly
That's why girls don't want to flex with me, I'm ******* heavy
Stubby and smelly, chunky and sweaty, tubby and stenchy, and heartily fleshy
with the motherfucking nostrils of Pesci
You wondering, why, what a right little mess he be
Looking like some Christian prophet who's lived for centuries

I'm supernatural, sixteen bars coming after you
Never go against Illustraight, he might embarrass you
His vocab, will leave you frozen, like some statues
Too scared to look at me, with a sheisty attitude
Yo, check out the way that I flex this
I'm reckless, like a celeb showing off her necklace
My lines are golden, like the moments you hold onto
When I'm on you, just know that's nowhere to run to
Hit you with a one two, like I was ambidextrous
Double-handed, setting some kind of double-standard
A man with a split personality, I spit with insanity
and **** with mentality, without the sentimentality
Check it, the way I kill this, minus casualties
I fly through this casually, automatic or manually
Switching styles like car gears across lanes
Ills keeps it true to the game, always the same
Ha

Just an actual freestyle off the top

all the shoes fit thats why i spit but show some incentive
throw you in a fire pit or a ditch while you get defensive
oh ****, you resemble a giant clit cuz your not impressive
im quit wit but thats it ima send you a message
while your on your mommas tit go check the checklist
the time i invested ,now you know what the best is
come and test this ill leave you rekt kid
you rap against me but im not to be messed with
your a vestige swingin for fences
i meant it give ills a med kit
tell the world how it feels to be bested
your lemon scented so is the **** you invented
say im unintelligent but yet im fully sentient?
ok...
come on bro your lyrics are pitiful
what do i gotta do to get rid of you
say im dumb yet your intellect is so minuscule
talk to a shrink to go check your vision dude!
but you somehow theorize im eradicated
its sad to say it youll obviously never make it
cuz i realized you must have never graduated
im fascinated how you think my **** is tedious
im trying to be more nice a little bit more lenient
cuz if you were my dawg id figure you be more obedient
but i should put you to sleep just for being a deviant
your a oddity . a nominal anomaly
i show modesty , a probable prodigy
honestly i just see you narrow minded as such as feeble
possibly lethal but will always blend in with the people
im evil and you not good enough to be my equal
i bringing down the iron curtain cuz yours is just see through
**** being peaceful
ill send german armys around me just to go and seize you (bars)

Fought with the giants and hung with the titans
Killed with the lions and ran with the bisons
Why lord is killing enticing ,i might win
But i might not its like fighting mike tyson
Ill give you a fist behind a glove
The way it connects you can call it a hug
Came from the the dirt and walked thru the mud
Came to **** everyone up whos a thug
Or whoever deems as such ,Ill just Pull the clutch
Its not much but theres no trouble leavin u crushed
Catch you playin double dutch and push your legs shut
Rest up cuz whoever claiming thug is already next up
I flex ,yup, cuz i found the greatest and who the best was
And drowned his ass like the flood in texas

as a kid i grew up in poverty since I was born
always wanted the new **** I cant afford
I was bored then quickly my life turned to a storm
I was warned but always disobeyed the accord
I was torn but life went on like a spiral
ignored the bible considered god as just a title
i would fight you, now I'm more cautious as gods disciple
I ******* idol in a room cuz I wouldn't like you
they had every right to
beat me and jump me, **** I had to survive through
they were hoping I die soon
crazy ass life **** was just like a typhoon
**** now im religious thanks to those darkest days
I'm amazed and stay that way to the grave
now i behave cuz i been transformed to a slave
still depraved but say my prayers every day
my life mentally injured but its not my concern
who tryna burn? smoke weed and i lyrically kinda learned
its not what you earn its wheres your urn? so who wants a turn ?
nice and firm on my terms i pass that **** like some germs
people are worms but they store all that bitterness
same **** like snakes i dont what the difference is
people acting like animals with all that ignorance
so i guess im the same as a cannibal in the wilderness..ey had every right to

kill a fat man on the train tracks in a way that
your brain splats on the cat scan
hear the facts fam I'm the realer captain you can ask them i got fast hands
any mans a killer I'm just batman
cut legs,sides and sell your liver in the back then
turn your left thigh to cinder and just smash them
so relaxin to see you wither and turn to ash friend!
i trash trends in past tense watch your ass send
to the dumpster in glad bags you fag men
lol a freestyle

I'm about to give Samy a brand new haircut, off the top of the head
Give him a direct cut, then a crop until his head is covered in red dreadlocks
What a dreadful thought, like a setting prop of an American cop
in an apparel shop prepped with a devilock dressed in knots
Plus your crew's been cut by a hair's breadth
And Samy is trying to keep his hair on his chest
A lot of truth is said in jest, but in this hair-raising case
Samy is a hair out of place
Now he's having a bad hair day
Ills grabs this by the short hairs, and makes Sam's hair gray
Come within an inch of this bad guy's hair, and I'll swear, that I'll tear
you limb from limb, and let you hang by your hair
Now you're in the crosshairs, you're hanging by a thread
And the fact that I got it locked on you, has got some of your hair standing on end
with some more standing on the back of your neck
This is hair-splitting, guaranteed to make your ringlets drop
You're a fringe caught in a French twist, like a shingle bob
You try to pimp a lot
but with no jheri's, you're all curled up like a chignon
You might as well thin your spots and wear a 1920's conk
Trying to stand up like a liberty top, but you end up flopping like a Ringo mop
**** it, you're better off wearing a wig on top
Like I said, this is off the top of the head
but in this case, I'd rather you just kept it on instead
Samy, when it comes to rhymes, you hardly use your head
Every time someone kills you in a freestyle, you always lose your head
That explains why some of the time you're half-dead like one of Snoop's men
You ******* Buddha head, with a noodle that's wet
And "noodle" is British slang for "mug", woodenhead
Samy, you may have a dick, but even THAT doesn't use its head

Oh. BARS.

it seems ills under the impression hes gotten me
leave him in that genjutsu and give him an apology
I'm sorry b, when I'm broken I have no warrantee
I order 3 hitman to come smoke with me
I notably out smoke ya team,i focus deep
into any astrophysics and physiology
show me homey how its supposed to be
...
don't conform to normality,reality is just a façade
lifes a worn mentality ,actually decaying till gone
I'm relaying a relating statement in songs
I'm saying a revelation of encasement is wrong
I'm defacing a bong and creatin a tron
waitin patient in my basement let me state it "its on"
ahhhhhhhhhhhh

Samyboy have you ever thought about dating a female rapper?

i already got a bad bitch fam lol

people got the problems but they never come to surface
you control your life so you choose to be worthless
on purpose or unintentional at the very least
your basically diseased when your walking with no peace
but be at ease ,I'm telling you we, can overcome the madness
positivity attracts negativity like magnets
the fact is lifes a bitch but to me shes a worried ex
always checks on my life and trys to see whats next
debating,reading all my texts trying to give me tests
waiting, for me to **** up and take whatever there is left
so now I'm facing karmic repercussions, I should be blushin
cuz I been blessed since my parents reproduction
so yeah I feel special I'm a walking miracle
but the ******* devil makes my life so miserable
I cant deny it I ******* know I'm protected
cuz I would of been locked down and arrested
youd expect it cuz I cant control the wreckage
so I invested time to being well respected
unless it, makes kindness into weakness then I'm not someone to mess wit
respect bitch!

You want to "state that it's on"?
Bitch, you couldn't make a statement in any shape or form
if you wore an apron smothered in baby vomit
Now look at the state of you! The way that these charms
make a mess of you, I made some stains very easy
to be accumulated on your garments
Like you played too much in the sun, baked in your garden
You're a sick, contaminated toddler, attending 6th grade kindergarten
with a crazy father and a zany mother both taking medication and tonic
Like a Catholic, there are stains painted on your glass
And they say that you stay under a place made of glass
It's important that you don't lapidate any rocks
But it's plain that you violated the Book of John
"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." - Chapter 8 verse 1
If you don't like the way I've slain you
Then you can copy and paste this on your Facebook wall
Complaining you got bombed
like Bin Laden when he put a plane through those blocks
and brought the house down like Latifah, when she dominated Martin's cock
Watch the way that I rock, and make a stain in my jocks
with more discolouration than a face that's gone off-colour
Off the wall like MJ in his early days
Oops, my mistake. I just plagiarised Ja

Check it, I was born an adult, and grew into a child
Threw a book of files at a bully hooked with the clout
Went wild and loose like the Wu in the Tunnel and ruined his smile
with a boot to the mouth, made the dude give out an "oof" and an "ouch"
Punched him between the family jewels, he howled
and ******* doubled like the price of fuel charged full to the gal
like a cruising missile fired by a group of troops
he flew through the clouds at a whopping speed of 200 miles
Now Illustraight has got this uncouth spooked the **** out
and it looks like this fool won't be abusing for a while
Because, you see, this is what happens when you pull some foolish fouls
And by "fouls", I mean stunts, kinda like those crooks shooting some football
with their pals using the stupidest style
And everybody knows in their heart that it's really cruel to clown
at a dude who's been down
like a depressed suicidalist who's been bullied and joked with at school and it's vile
Bars

Have you ever thought about serenading girls on the beach with a rap song just for shits and giggles?

Can any of you rappers respond to this in a rap?

I’ve just got off watching Noah with Russell Crowe
But watching May get off watching her own country fold
is so immodest, it could disgust pornographers, yo
She’s a slut, who supports stiff necks and dicks stuck under the romper holes
She plays with boys, Hugh Heffner style, just as well
because all of her Tory puppets are hoes
They suck up to her, like lollipops and bows
and that facade goes, to show, every time the drama rolls
How the personas of these types of harlots unfold
All exposed, like prostitutes taking off all their clothes
until all you see are bodies that are bold
What the **** do we expect from broads who are cold?
They promise us a good life, profits and gold
They HOOK US/HOOKERS onto a deal where we can prosper from the prospect and glow
But when we start holding onto those goals, and start to go for broke
That’s just what it is. The answer's in “broke”.
What a joke.
Now May has decided to throw us all in the boat
with dirts in our eyes, faces covered under some moats
Throwing us under the bus, when we’re crossing those roads
But then, ****, I suppose, when you’re sworn in after hundreds of votes
There’s always a dark side like Star Wars or how that Chinese philosophy goes
Next to a white side, there’s a black side
Which means with every good side, there’s a bad side
Wherever a good sign is, there’s a bad sign
And they say opposites attract, right?
Well, I must say that an opposition of our national rights
is detrimental to all of the hopes we have in our lives
of leading a nation that is not sabotaged by that kind of vice
that crumbles the very fibre and fabric of life
that made Britain what it is today - a land where we stand and we fight!
**** Trump and May, these two May come up Trumps
but the public knows the cards

..... To be continued 😆