living with a pot smoker

Well nimh, I think much of what you see in the reactions is people thinking the story altogether is either untrue or subject to gross hyperbole.

;-)

Edit: But personally I don't think weed is the issue nearly as much as the details that are surfacing that get progressively worse as the thread develops. Regardless of what cause, substance or whatever those issues would be the problems by my estimation, with or without pinning them to a reason.

But yeah, I agree with you on Jer's statement, there are indeed people who do get very dependent on weed, hell at many point is my life I've been a very heavy user myself.

Both, but in regard to the difference mainly the physiological differences.

eh, yep. :wink:

Some of the things Lily described here are instantly recognizable to me - see my post above. Perhaps thats why I dont push it aside as "hyperbole" as easily as you do.

I don't think it's hard to recognize for anyone here nimh. And I never said I push it aside as hyperbole, I said that some people's reactions here are probably based on that suspicion.

That's why there's all the winking and "detect a pattern?" comments going on.

I personally am not playing the guessing game this time.

Oh. Hadnt picked up on any of that yet. OK, I understand.

"How bad did he hurt you?"

Pretty bad. Sometimes it wasn't that bad, sometimes he knocked me out.

But i dont think he realised what he did until afterwards, like when i was lying on the ground knocked out and not responding. I came too with him hugging me and crying saying he was so sorry.

The last time he was shaking me while i was down and we have a granite floor in the kitchen and he heard my head smash the ground. He burst into tears and was just hugging me. He spent all day with me after that apologising profusely and holding on to me.

See, i dont know what caused the violence. I didnt think that smoking pot would do that to you. I have seen him fly off the rails and get really angry if he didn't have pot. but i was surprised to see him react violenty when he was stoned, but like i said before i dont think he realised what he was doing until i either wouldnt react or he heard or saw what damage he did.

Once we were out on the town one night for a dinner cruise with his work for a product launch. we went straight to the dinner after work. when the cruise finnished, we got off the boat, i was all dressed up in heals, and he said we had 3 minutes to get to the bus to be able to get home so we had to run. I had just eaten a huge dinner, had a few glasses of champagne and wearing three inch heels. I refused to run to catch a bus and instead walked casually to the bus stop. He went irate, said i was a stupid bitch for not running and it was all my fault we had to wait over 30 minutes for another, i said that's fine i can have another drink in another bar while we wait. the arguement got really bad and i refused to listen to him and said that he can go home if he wants, gave him money for a cab and said i am staying out on the town. Now do you think he was prepared to leave his girlfriend out on the town when she was dressed up in a short skirt and heels? he was stressing out cos he didnt know what to do.

Normally what happens is he goes straight home from work to smoke, and then he will go out or whatever, on this night that didnt happen. He was so strung out that he grabbed me by my arm and was pulling me along with him so i would catch a cab home with him. I think it was about 10.30 pm at this time so he wouldnt have smoked since before he went to work that morning.

I can understand the aggression and violent outburts when he was strung out because he hadnt smoked, but when he was stoned was something that i couldnt grasp.

When he was stoned, i think it was because he couldnt handle the arguement and just wanted it all to stop that the easiest way of making that happen would be to hit me until i couldnt do anything,

But then i dont think he was aware of what he was doing. I dont know if this pot or what it could possibly be...

any suggestions?

Suggestions?

I'm only gonna say this one more time. Leave him.

I have left him.

And i feel so much better for it.

I was just curious to understand the situation, the causes and consequences of smoking pot because the whole situation is really bizarre to me.

Well, one more suggestion might be to get a restraining order, but Brooke and Jespah might know more about the wisdom of doing that than I do.

I think i just want it over with. so no restraining orders, i just want to be away from the situation, and I am now.

I am staying with a friend and he doesnt know where i am. I haven't turned my cell phone on.

I just want to be away from him and the other flatmate.

There are myriad reasons why men hit women, lilly.

Bottom line is...no reason can justify it. You don't have to know "why" to know it's a very bad thing. And the prognosis for changing is not good. Not good at all.

Most men don't hit women, ever. Look for one of those. And don't settle.

The aggressiveness described here is very much a side effect of heavy use of cannabis. I've both seen it and experienced it. While I never displayed it physically myself I certainly felt it.

From what I'm seeing here Lily, I'm really surprised he hasn't turned to another other drug.
I have experienced irritability myself when I decided to quit smoking marijuana, it was nothing compared to when I stopped cigarettes and caffiene. Also I found it harder to fall asleep, but that's just me. I'm not going to be so ignorant as to assume that because those were the side effects I felt during withdrawal that that's how everyone else is going to experience it. It's different for everyone obviously.
Good for you for leaving the psycho. I'm sure if you were able to see what information you gave us from a third persons view, you'd realize this guy has got some split personality thing going on. Take it as a lesson learned.
By the way, I was just wondering if you had ever gotten high yourself with or without your ex-boyfriend?

I know people that have developed schizophrenia or clinical paronia through smoking too much weed. I think that this was something similar going on... before i lived with him i had no idea the total amount that he smoked. It was actually quite a fair bit and i know he would have been smoking for atleast ten years and that is going to have some serious problems with the brain and psychology.

I had no problems with him smoking it to get high. I have smoked it occassionally too, i am a college student! and i would go to parties and if there were a joint or two being passed around i would sometimes join in.

But his guy smoked serious amounts, he was stoned all the time except when he was at work. I dont have a problem with smoking for fun, i understand that side of the arguement, but i didnt want him to stop completely i wanted him to try to cut down some. Because he couldnt see how smoking this much impacted upon those around him. I think in a small amount, it only affects one person, and that's the person smoking it, but when it gets to the stage of it impacting upon all of your relationships and those around you, i think it's gone too far.

Right, lilly.

It's just like alcohol. Some people can handle it, some people can't. This guy can't.