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I stopped talking to someone I like and I regret it . Idk if I should try to get them back.

 
 
Reply Thu 16 Oct, 2014 02:57 pm
I've been dating this guy for six weeks and like an idiot I told him we should stop speaking and now I regret it. Never had I been so happy we had an amazing relationship like straight from a fairytale. We loved spending time with each other. We spoke about anything and everything all the time . We could truly be ourselves around each other as crazy as it sounds I felt like I've known him for for years and he felt the same. He spoiled me with affection and compliments we were always super mushy and romantic a quality I find I'm many men lack. He would do the sweetest gestures such as always getting me flowers and stuffed animals. He tried so hard to impress me with everything he did he was super open and honest about his feelings. I never met a guy that could express himself so much. The type of guy that always made you smile, would do anything to make you happy. Would surprise you at work with flowers and kids you all over your face , the most affectionate guy I ever met. Whatever I wanted to do he did no problem. He was opened to living and making life an adventure with me.What intrigued me was how much he captivated me I have no problems getting dates but I always felt empty and I am very picky I want someone who makes me feel alive as I am a romantic type I like for love to feel surreal like a dream. I think the fact that he and I was very similar he was also very good looking and charming I knew he had no problem getting women but never took anyone serious , he never found that one he was looking for. I loved how I was his first the first person to ever make him feel amazing and have him smiling all the time. We were smitten with each other and every second he told me he cherish. I was the first girl introduced to his family and I was surprised how fast our feelings were increasing .

But through all this amazement there were some issues. See we met through online dating app which stated he was 23 but would be 24 in a month and I felt a bit odd because I was 25 but our first date he told me he was 20 and did not want to lie to me. He didn't blame me if I left I was very disappointed because that night felt like a dream best date I ever had. But this was one of the reasons I was confused but we continued to talk he acted very mature for his age and treated me like a princess. Other things we was brutally honest about his past and would talk about things I didn't want to hear. I was new to that most men I dated did not talk about other women to the point where I questioned if he was serious about wanting a relationship even though countless times he said he was. Lastly he was never in a relationship which usually meant he would need training and I did not want to be a babysitter. I was confused I had an amazing guy in my life but I just wished he was older and more experienced so I cut it off a couple of times and he told me he did not understand what he was doing wrong. Even with women that were girlfriends he did not treat them this special and to make me happy made him happy but he got tired of me questioning him he told me his actions should convey his emotions to me.

Now I wonder if I made a mistake I just wanted to protect myself but never had I been so happy I also felt like I could fall in love with him and didn't want to make a mistake . I think about him a lot I tried telling him how I felt not that I wanted to talk again just why I was confused and why I acted so unsure of him and he sounded as if he had given up, not sure if I blame him. That nothing he does for me would be good enough and did not want a relationship with no trust. But that I was amazing and hell never forget me and some things aren't meant to be that everything happens for a reason. Idk if that was the pain of us not talking or if he really has given up. I want to know if he has if I should try to contact him one last time to see how he truly feels but he feels as if I'm indecisive and he does not want to go back and forth. It's like since the moment I told him I didn't want to speak he convinced himself it's for the better and I'm here wondering if I made a mistake. I would love one more chance to tell him how I feel before all hope is gone but I feel as if he has made up his mind. Not sure what to do.
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Thu 16 Oct, 2014 03:23 pm
@Angelbaby667,
This does not have to be all or nothing. You do realize that after less than 2 months, you didn't have to be exclusive with just him.

Be that as it may, keep one thing in mind: he got to the relationship stage under false pretenses. And he seems to enjoy blabbing about his exes. I doubt that either of those things will miraculously change if you reconcile. If you can live with that now, then hey, go for it and apologize, etc. If not, then don't bother.

PS You can have amazing conversations with someone else. I doubt this guy has a monopoly on such things.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Thu 16 Oct, 2014 03:25 pm
@Angelbaby667,
You dated for six weeks and ended it.

Good thing you hadn't invested much time.

Take the opportunity to learn from how you behaved and reacted in the short dating period.

Try to be a little more chill next time.

Move on.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Thu 16 Oct, 2014 04:13 pm
Congratulations!! You've had your first Boy Toy.

Write this off as an experience and start up again, this time wiser.

PS - If you REALLY thought about it, I bet you were in the "teacher/mentor" role with him and he brought very little to the relationship except being cute.
Olivier5
 
  2  
Reply Fri 17 Oct, 2014 06:51 am
@Angelbaby667,
You just learnt the hard way that the best is the enemy of the good.

From what you tell, you stand low chances of getting him back. That sort of natural, free flowing bliss of love that you describe is beautiful but fragile. It was based on carefree abandon and total trust. Now that you hurt him, he will never open up to you the same way as before. He will always have some fear that you will hurt him again. And if he is as smart as he seems to be, he won't make the same mistake twice.

A broken pot can be glued back into some shape but it's never going to look the same.

Now, if you are really in love, you still have the romantic nuclear option: the 5 pages love letter where you throw yourself at his feet asking for his forgiveness for your faults and say you can't live without him. That has worked more than once, but it takes some humility.


0 Replies
 
mark noble
 
  -1  
Reply Fri 17 Oct, 2014 07:13 am
@Angelbaby667,
Do NOT listen to the 'utter-bollocks' these 'agony-aunts' posted!
Step outside your EGO and GET that guy back, if it's the last thing you ever do. DO IT NOW!
Come shame, regret, failure (unlikely) SEEK HIM OUT AND BEG HIS FORGIVENESSS!

My advice is based on this principle: T'is when you risk losing all that matters, you have 'all that matters' to risk losing.

TAKE HEED!
Now GO FETCH!
0 Replies
 
Krumple
 
  1  
Reply Fri 17 Oct, 2014 07:40 am
@PUNKEY,
PUNKEY wrote:

Congratulations!! You've had your first Boy Toy.

Write this off as an experience and start up again, this time wiser.

PS - If you REALLY thought about it, I bet you were in the "teacher/mentor" role with him and he brought very little to the relationship except being cute.



Ouch. Funny but ouch. Nice guys don't finish last, they never get a chance to finish. ha ha

EDIT: On a side note you can pat your back for turning a nice guy into a dick. If he learns anything he will realize nice gets you no where except alone. Now he will just join the ranks of the types of guys women complain about but sleep with anyways.
Germlat
 
  1  
Reply Fri 31 Oct, 2014 02:41 pm
@Krumple,
Krumple wrote:

PUNKEY wrote:

Congratulations!! You've had your first Boy Toy.

Write this off as an experience and start up again, this time wiser.

PS - If you REALLY thought about it, I bet you were in the "teacher/mentor" role with him and he brought very little to the relationship except being cute.



Ouch. Funny but ouch. Nice guys don't finish last, they never get a chance to finish. ha ha

EDIT: On a side note you can pat your back for turning a nice guy into a dick. If
he learns anything he will realize nice gets you no where except alone. Now he will just join the ranks of the types of guys women complain about but sleep with anyways.

I'm calling Bullcrap on this...actually...I think ice guys ( the ones that hold off) get the best gals!! I'm a liked of nice guys!
0 Replies
 
 

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