A rough translation (without the damn dictionary to tell me the word for SUVs, which I've sadly Never used in German) would be:
Ich bin Ihr Ehrlöser; mich anbeten. Sie bilden sehr gute Autos, aber Autos des Sports, bitte nicht bilden.
*Can sense how much money we could make by translating the anti-SUV bible for world audiences*
Zamphir and his pan flute provide bass lines behind Slim Whitman as lead singer robed in lime green, a real standout from the Omaha Aquarium Choir's rendition of "There will be a hot time in the old town tonight"
don't be dyss'n the prophet Kahlil!
"He that believeth not is condemned already."
I'm loving it all, especially the catatonic dance ceremony. I'm hoping some of the cat owners will lend us their felines so we can wig them out on catnip for the occasion.
No dancing cat would win me over. I'd punt it like I'm going for a 50 yard field goal. I'd fry it up like I was preparing some good Chinese. You know whaddumsayin'? I don't like the cats.
May I suggest a rather old song for the offertory hymn? My dad used to sing it as a ditty, but I'm sure that our "savior" could easily expand it. It goes like this,
Fleecing all the sheep,
Fleecing all the sheep.
We will come rejoicing,
Fleecing all the sheep!
Oh Cav
, where do you come across all these links. That is sickening hilarious!
Rayvatrap, I think I stumbled on this one by accident, but it was too funny to ignore.
in thanks of your involvement with the religion. 
