Am I in Love?

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Please people if you can really help me. I'm a 16 year old girl in the state of Missouri and I go to a tech high school. There is this boy I met that was in my first after school class, 1 month later we started dating until now. I still love him till this day. He likes to dance, sing, and act like me and most of all rap. But the problem is, is that there is another boy in my classes at school, he’s the same age and loves to sing act and dance. AND this guy I'm REALLY falling for! His eyes are big like puppies, and he has these bone structured cheeks that makes you wanna kiss them in slow hot motion. Every time I see him I feel a wind of happiness, and on my way home when i think of him I feel a pulling of my insides, as though my hormones were thinking of him as well. My boyfriend went through a lot, and when he sees me talk to other guys he gets sad without telling me what’s wrong. His friend got shot in front of him, and his parents abused Him. And of that reason he gets physically aggressive just a little bit on me. The other guy is a very goofy boy, he acts like an insulting clown. And I'm also that way. I am VERY goofy and I want someone natural and open. Every time I sleep I dream of this boy, I toss and turn thinking does he hate me or like me back. He is also me and my boyfriend's friend. He plays like a kid with adhd but he is really down to earth. I never saw him date or kiss anyone at the school, and I can tell by his scents that he has a very bad home condition. Poor thing. But PLEASE people am I in love or not, I really want this boy to feel the same way I do. And he has so many expressions to show I can't tell. I love my boyfriend, he has muscles and a beautiful sweet soul, but my chest for some reasons falls deep for the other boy. And one more thing, when I'm with this boy, when were by each other, we glance at each other as though our eyes are in heaven. But the glance lasts for only 8 sec. Please help me. Tell me am I REALLY in love, or not.

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Type: Question • Score: 10 • Views: 2,876 • Replies: 55

@StarDanceGirl,

No. You're not. You just have a "puppy dog" crush on some post-pubescent boys. Enjoy the fickleness of youth because as you get older you'll probably take life a little more seriously.

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@StarDanceGirl,

Both boys have backgrounds according to you that are not pleasant. In my opinion, you are acting like the Mother, "poor thing" just that comment and the one about your current boyfriend makes me think that if you were older this would be why you want to date either of them and any "type" simular but as you are 16 you are going for the kids stuff, crush.

You don't love your current boyfriend hun, if you did you would not be trying to find validation on line to leave him for someone else. As, that's not love right?

However, I suspect you don't like the "little" physical abuse that your current boyfriend gives you and you are frightened it may turn ever worse to something more physical, both boys have the simular interests that you like and you see this new guy "his mate" as being the same yet without violence ?

Even sub-consciously I think.

How do you know he is better than what you have?

Fact. The moment someone is physically abusive to you LEAVE ... Because no man no matter what age hits a girl/ woman ...

That's your first step.

From there take time out for you and then take things slowly and see what this guy is like.

Don't go falling into a simular pattern .

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@FOUND SOUL,

Why give this person a serious answer? It's obvious given her age, the context of the story that its due to the maturity and fickleness of her youth as I've described.

1 Reply

@Buttermilk,

Buttercup , sorry milk.

Why not? 1) Who knows who googles her thread heading and reads a reply that helps someone else . 2) So you'd rather give her no answers at all, and just see her as a 16 year old that is fickle and immature "as you described" how can that help her, telling her that. She'll ignore you...

1 Reply

@StarDanceGirl,

I'll give you the answer that has been given in these sorts of situations for decades - if you have to ask, then the answer is no.

Sorry. Welcome to the world of crushes.

1 Reply

@FOUND SOUL,

Because its obvious that she's young and her feelings amount to having a crush, infatuation, etc

When someone says they're 16 and in love with a boy after being with another boy it lets me know that their fickleness is the result of their youth which also leads me to believe that they're not thinking their feelings through hence my usage of the word "immature" just like your immature behavior in calling me buttercup (as opposed to my actual handle) to appear funny.

But if you want to be silly enough to give a teenage girl who is obvious that she "loves" so quickly after being with one boy some serious advice be my guest. As far as whether she'll respond to me it doesn't matter. I've been with enough women in my life to know the difference between a fickle mentality and a serious one.

The point in my response is to be realistic not to promote her fantastic emotions. I was 16 once and I thought like her, I think we all did at one point. I would rather be realistic than feed her nonsense which reality will eventually teach her anyway.

BTW I think I answered your 1) and 2) in this response.

1 Reply

@FOUND SOUL,

Thank You for your consideration. Buttermilk was being an old school jerk. I have one more thing to say. I DREAM ABOUT THIS BOY DAILY AND MY HEART THROBS OF HIM, NOT AS THE REGULAR TEEN CRUSH BUT AS A CERTAIN HEAVENLY MOVEMENT-----WAT IS THIS?

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@jespah,

jespah wrote:

I'll give you the answer that has been given in these sorts of situations
for decades - if you have to ask, then the answer is no.

I think that makes sense.

Love is an emotion; it is subjective (felt inside your mind).
It seems odd to me that anyone can be expected to figure out
whether or not u r having a subjective feeling; like asking if u r hungry.

Most Respectfully:
U must define it for yourself by analysis of your own emotion.

David

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@StarDanceGirl,

I'd like it if you would think on something and maybe answer me.
Do you see similarities with these two boys in how they were bought up?
Do you feel sorry for them both? Wink

Now the last question. Do you think this new "crush" is better than your current guy and maybe you won't feel threatened in a physical way by him and that he has a lot of similarities but appears to be even........better?

Lust is still lust, dreams, heart throbbing radarada trust me.. I remember those stupid bands "The Monkeys" haha, old huh? And boy did I have a crush and a half, that sounded a bit like what you are describing, now ask me, well Brad Pitt is better.

But, seriously, could you answer my questions above...

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@FOUND SOUL,

Brad Pitt is fifty or so now...there isn't a 16 year old that finds him hot. He is close to 3 times their age. Wink

. I'm cognizant of this because kids often point stuff like this out to me. I said I loved Colin Firth the other day...and the girls giggled and said he was "like...a grandpa". I simply laughed and realized they were being honest. I pulled out the big guns and said, ". What about Justin Bieber or
Bruno Mars? (Just to redeem myself he-he) I agree with the pity thing....girls don't want to be mean and get confused. Crushes come and go...you're right. But most of all I know if you're in love you don't have to ask. Girls also fall in and out of love often at this age.

1 Reply

@Germlat,

I know I was going with Harry Styles at first, but then I thought, I'd be called a Cougar Wink

Justin is a "baby" ...

I totally agree with that, crushes do come and go. Girls do go with "pity" and both guys have had supposedly hard or sad lives to date, but, one has been abusive hence my questions to this young one..........

1 Reply

@FOUND SOUL,

For sure Justin and Bruno are both babies....I also want to stay out of the cougar arena. I still couldn't believe they called Colin Firth a grandpa ....Jeez time flies...oh yeah they also said "ewww" at Hugh Grant. Laughing

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Is it me, or does this sound totally like something Gus would write?

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@chai2,

His eyes are big like puppies, and he has these bone structured cheeks that makes you wanna kiss them in slow hot motion.

0 Replies

@chai2,

Who is Gus?? Sorry haven't been here long!

1 Reply

@Germlat,

Here is some classic gustavratzenhofer.....

http://able2know.org/topic/29125-1

Unfortunaltely he doesn't come around often anymore (sigh)

1 Reply

@chai2,

Wow, What a train wreck ..I read the whole thing. I knew it disaster was coming...but couldn't help myself from reading!!

2 Replies

@Germlat,

No way.

It's one of the best threads ever.

Ask anyone, gus is the best.

1 Reply

@Germlat,

Ok...struck me as an artist or poet....nothing wrong but I anticipated disaster. Not saying he/she is not likeable. Some of my favorite people are artists/poets. I tend to be very honest....people always tell me so. Can't help it. It hardly ever works in my favour.

1 Reply

Am I in Love?

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