Sweet Katy wrote:
I am 17 and so is my boyfriend. We have been dating for a year. No doubt we both love each other very much. But he wants physical intimacy with me and I always oppose him. One reason may be that I am afraid of being cheated on because men usually lose the interest after getting that close to a girl. Another reason, which is in fact the biggest reason, is that I promised my parents that I won't do anything wrong which our conscience and society don't allow and I won't let them down. But I never doubt his love for me. It is so intense that sometimes I too want to get physical but I stop myself because I can't lose my parents for a guy no matter how much he loves me. Please tell me how to convince my boyfriend that we should not do such kinda things before getting married. Help me!?
I think personally some of your premises are wrong. Such as..
Sweet Katy wrote:
One reason may be that I am afraid of being cheated on because men usually lose the interest after getting that close to a girl.
This is NOT actually true. Is it possible? Sure but it doesn't always go this way.
But whos to say if you wait 5 or 10 years and then get married that he wouldn't just leave you anyways? Marriage does not guarantee that he will stay with you after you have sex.
I think some people who do wait for marriage fall into the same problem because sometimes you are just not sexually compatible and that can cause problems in the relationship and if you are married it could ruin the marriage.
So in my personal opinion you gain nothing by waiting for marriage before being physically intimate.
If your parents get mad or disown you for being physically intimate with your boyfriend then in my opinion they are not good parents. Are they hoping you'll wait for some stable relationship first? Sure nothing wrong with that but to disown you for your personal choices is even worse.
With all that said, and some of it might sound rather harsh to you. If you personally are not ready for what ever reason then go with that feeling. Let him know that you are not fully ready for a physically intimate relationship yet. If he does love and care for you, he will understand and give you that time you need. Nothing wrong with that at all. Wait until you feel right about it. I'll even add regardless if you are married or not, wait until you feel right about it. That's the best advice I can give.