Why has she ceased speaking to me?

@Nom de plume,

Nom de plume wrote:

There are trolls everywhere anymore.

That's not even English.

To the OP:

As CoastalRat said, over and over again, we don't know WHY she stopped contacting you.

I suggest, however, from what you've written, that you didn't give any indication of interest in her as a female (other than the 2 cuddling episodes) for her to want to continue your 'studies'. You appear cold or uninterested, while she clearly (i.e. the cuddling episodes) was. Why did you
cuddle with her if you weren't interested?

I think she was interested, thought you were (due to those two episodes), and when she saw you were unmoved, unemotional, uninterested, decided she was wrong and left.

If you care for her, and it seems that you do from all the energy you've invested here in this, plus coming here in the first place, then you should head on over to her house, since you don't have her phone number, and speak to her in person, as CoastalRat and others have suggested. Go to the source and find out what's what.

Q: Why would you kiss and cuddle someone you don't care for and aren't interested in?

Q: Why spend so much time trying to find out her motives if you're aren't interested?

I suggest you ARE interested, otherwise why study with her, kiss and cuddle with her, and then spend time trying to find out what went wrong.

The first and most important thing you have to do in life is be honest with yourself at all times and fact the facts. Face the music. Face yourself. You've been playing games because of insecurity or other issues and you don't want to admit it. You DO care about her and why she up and left.

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@glitterbag,

Was the goal of that post to flaunt your life accolades in an attempt to impress me? It didn't work.

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@CoastalRat,

You changed your mind because you can't handle not getting the last word.

You have yet to show a single inconsistency.

I explained clearly why going and talking to her would not be an option (even if I had wanted it to be in the first place). I'm still not sure what is so hard about this for you to understand. If you were as smart as you think you are I'm sure you'd figure this out.

I suppose one woman constitutes ALL women, then, correct? CoastalRat logic strikes again. Just another of many different series of evidences that life has indeed failed you.

Don't be mad because I didn't accept your insult as a response.

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@Nom de plume,

Thank you.
Yeah, that's what I've ended up doing.

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@Mame,

You're right. I do care about her and I want to talk to her. You don't think it would be creepy if I just showed up at her house?

I thought she and I were on the same page. We had finals coming up and I had a lot of work to do. I had to study for my finals and finish some research I was doing at the lab. Couple that with the fact that I have part time work and I was just really stressed. I didn't want her to take that the wrong way, but I guess she must have (from what you're saying).

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@JimmyJ,

Well, I'm crushed.

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@JimmyJ,

Hell you have nothing to loss so if you know her address go big sending her some flowers with a note saying that you are missing her company and hope that no actions of your cause that to occur.

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I hope you are not an English major, and if you don't have a good dictionary, I suggest you get one right away. Accolade is not the same thing as experience or training. You don't get a trophy or an award for changing diapers or language studies. You know what really sucks? You can get a grade for language studies, but you can't get a grade for changing diapers, how fair is that? I wish you well on your pursuits for the future. I'm sure you will be a glorious success and world renowned___________fill in blank space.

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@JimmyJ,

You are so fun and so easy to show up. You have spent 4 pages telling us you don't want to talk to her and now you say you really do. You spent 4 pages telling us you have no way to contact her, now you say you do by showing up at her house.

Quote:

You have yet to show a single inconsistency.

Well, I've started this post with two of them.

Quote:

I explained clearly why going and talking to her would not be an option (even if I had wanted it to be in the first place)

And yet now you say you can indeed contact her. You are a lying piece of crap and you have been from the get go.

5 or 6 people tell you repeatedly to go talk to her and you deny you have any way to do so and now, after 4 pages of your lying crap you decide that hey, I really do want to talk to her and might go see her. And you have the nerve to call BillRm, Glitter and I names.

I take back the good luck I wished you. Hopefully, if you do get the balls to go talk to her, she simply slams the door in your face.

And you know what? I was actually starting to think I'd made a mistake in being so critical of you. Well, your last couple of posts proves I was right all along. You're an ass.

1 Reply

@glitterbag,

Accolade:
an award or privilege granted as a special honor or as an acknowledgment of merit.

I'm not an English major, but I'm pretty sure bragging about all the things you've done in your life can be considered boasting your "metaphorical" accolades.

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@CoastalRat,

Wrong again. I want to talk to her, but not about this. I said I missed talking to her on a regular basis as it was before all this happened. I never said I wanted to go speak with her about what's happening right now. Logically, I would not consider showing up to her house unannounced as a legitimate option. Maybe you've done that to girls in the past and they've probably found you to be a creep, but I'd rather not go down that road.

You started your post with nothing (per usual at this point).

You can cry all you want. I've already responded to your 3rd by telling you that anyone who would consider showing up at her house unannounced would probably be a creep (as you obviously are, I can tell from your post and mannerisms).

If you're so upset by my responses just stop posting here. Clearly I don't value your input or opinion (and after your first post, which in itself had already included an insult, I knew your opinion would be of no use).

1 Reply

@JimmyJ,

Quote:

If you're so upset by my responses just stop posting here.

So you come onto this system and then tell a long term member to stop posting here.

Lord I am feeling sorry for any woman now or in the future that have any personal relationship with you.

1 Reply

@JimmyJ,

JimmyJ wrote:

Accolade:
an award or privilege granted as a special honor or as an acknowledgment of merit.

I'm not an English major, but I'm pretty sure bragging about all the things you've done in your life can be considered boasting your "metaphorical" accolades.

Well don't wager any money, because you would Lose your shirt. I hate to bust your bubble but there is no such thing as a "metaphorical accolade". Keep this in mind if you write your own résumé, you must be able to list any skills or experience you can bring to a job. One last piece of advice (unless you spout more adolescent life assumptions) never, ever assume anybody over the age of 30 gives a crap about what a college student thinks constitutes success.

In the future, make sure you are using words properly, ergo, get a good dictionary. This will prevent others from viewing you as uneducated. One exception, if you are writing bad poetry, make up anything and pray you appear to be a genius.

1 Reply

@glitterbag,

There's no such thing as a metaphorical accolade?

Did you decide this for the whole of society on your own? By definition, a metaphorical accolade would not be any sort of tangible award (hence why it's metaphorical). Nobody will mistake me for being "uneducated" for using the phrase "metaphorical accolade". If you didn't care about what I thought constituted success you wouldn't be getting so flustered that I don't find any of your boasted achievements/experience to be impressive in the least. I know people my age who have done/learned more.

In the future you should make sure you don't just assume that a certain phrase or combination of words cannot exist just because it doesn't support your argument. It will prevent others from viewing you as petty, arrogant, and childish.

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@JimmyJ,

JimmyJ wrote:

I will try to be as detailed as possible here.

I started talking to this girl that I met at the university that I attend. We had a lot in common. We both had just gotten out of long term relationships in which we were cheated on. We liked a lot of the same things. . She actually was the one who initiated the conversation and the process of us getting closer.
She used to invite me to her house and what not and we would play video games and watch game of thrones and stuff like that. We texted each other all the time. Mind you, I'm no fool. I didn't usually initiate the texting or wanting to hang out because I didn't want her to feel as though I was smothering or overbearing (plus I was still going through a rough emotional imbalance myself). But we finally did go on a few dates and we kissed and stuff and everything was good (this lasted about two weeks). One day we were studying together and what not and she randomly just said "bye" in a friendly voice and left (semi-rudely). I was a bit
flustered/taken aback by this. I have not texted her since that day and she hasn't texted me. It's been over a week since we have spoken (she usually texted me every day). I haven't made the mistake that most guys make in which I call/text repeatedly and push them even further away. I've attempted no communication whatsoever. Truthfully, I'm not that upset about the whole thing. I'm just curious as to what may have happened (though I do miss talking to her because I didn't think I could bond with someone on that level ever again after my ex)? Logically speaking, another guy coming into the picture seems
most likely.

Any ideas?

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@BillRM,

I told him to stop posting on this particular thread if it's upsetting him so much to the point of blatant insults.

Ridiculous attacks and online arguments with someone less than half your age seems a bit low. "Lord, I am feeling sorry for THE woman who has to put up with you every day."

1 Reply

@JimmyJ,

JimmyJ wrote:

Ridiculous attacks and online arguments with someone less than half your age seems a bit low. "Lord, I am feeling sorry for THE woman who has to put up with you every day."

Wait until you meet hawkeye Razz

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@ossobuco,

ossobuco wrote:

I need to do a review. I got at least some of his gripes and he has gotten a dump from one who does't always do that.
Poster answers all of you by reviewing what he had been thinking, I get that, and then he deals with slammos.

He still is wondering, and I get that. Doesn't mean he is some perve, he would like to understand.

I'm no rescuer of posters, but I see his inquiry.

I still feel this way. I get why two of my firmly liked posters are aggravated with Jimmyj, both rising beyond their usual conversational tone to their advice, but I can also envision being him (though I'm a woman), since I remember thinking my way at some length about why someone was acting whatever way had happened re me with a clear dismissal.

Sometimes you never know - my first love left me suddenly and that was when I was astoundingly ignorant of most cultures not my own but catching up speedily.
He showed up a few days later, but did eventually leave me. It was religion - at the time I was sauntering slowly away from being a catholic or anything, and he and his parents were jewish atheists, and his mother told him it would never work. I didn't learn that until I ran into him at the university some months later, and he was now with the woman who would be his long time wife.

His mother!

Me, I say -
I think she may have given up on you ever making advances;
or, you said something that totally shut her off;
or, some combo, in that she saw she was getting nowhere and was somewhat pissed.

1 Reply

@Mame,

Some of us play with words - that's the kind of thing I would say on purpose.

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@ossobuco,

Well, I figured that showing up at her house would be too creepy. I remembered that Saturday's she has research with one of her professors so I just "ran into her" today to talk (since there's seemingly no other alternative on how to find out what happened).

I'll try to summarize what she said. I asked her what happened between us and what I did wrong so that I could avoid doing such a thing in the future. She pretended to not know what I was talking about and dismissed it as "being busy" with final exams and such. She was evasive throughout the rest of the conversation. I could tell it was going nowhere and that she was afraid of hurting my feelings or saying something that would upset me. I just told her not to worry about me and said goodbye basically. That's that, I guess. I'll never know what happened or what I did lol

1 Reply

Why has she ceased speaking to me?

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