9
   

I lost my will to live. Hint: office Christmas party

 
 
Angel23
 
Reply Sat 22 Dec, 2012 08:01 am
It happened on the 17th dec. I wanted so much to go to the party that I been looking forward to since September. Problem is, my family wanted to vacation 4 hours away that day and made me to with them. I tried to protest, but they shot me down, so I went, pretending to enjoy it. On our way there, I got called in to work and I had to say no, since I was already 3 hours away. I woulda loved to be able to say yes and then go in to work, giving me direct access to the party. Instead, since then, I spent all my waking moments in misery, even after getting back home.

I lost my will to live. I sleep 18 hours a day and cut myself. I over eat and sometimes drink a lot. I get short with everyone I meet. And Thursday at work, I felt humiliated seeing my coworkers who been at the party, so I avoided everyone. I couldn't focus. Then during break, I overate again, threw up in the restroom, and felt severely dizzy afterwards. I left work early. Thx god nobody knew that I made myself sick or I'd be screwed! Still, I lost my will to live. Should I find another job?
 
PUNKEY
 
  3  
Reply Sat 22 Dec, 2012 08:07 am
@Angel23,
Angel - It was ONE party, ONE day, ONE time, ONE event.

Don't put so much importance upon it.



jespah
 
  5  
Reply Sat 22 Dec, 2012 09:16 am
@Angel23,
You should be telling your therapist this.
0 Replies
 
tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Sat 22 Dec, 2012 09:29 am
@PUNKEY,
PUNKEY wrote:

Angel - It was ONE party, ONE day, ONE time, ONE event.

Don't put so much importance upon it.


Yep. There will be another party next year. Plan ahead and try to convince your family early and often the meaning of what attending this party means to you social wise.
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Sat 22 Dec, 2012 10:23 am
@tsarstepan,
My coworker just posted on Facebook pictures of the party. I cut myself.
DrewDad
 
  4  
Reply Sat 22 Dec, 2012 10:49 am
@Angel23,
I'm having a hard time taking this thread seriously.

If this is real, then the problem is obviously not the Christmas party. The problem is that you're Axis 2, and you need a really good therapist, if there are any that will take you.
PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Sat 22 Dec, 2012 03:06 pm
@DrewDad,
Yes - it's not about the party.

Angel is not able to deal with rejection and missing the party makes her feel rejected by "the gang." I suspect that there's also rage against her family who she may feel is responsible for missing the party. Cutting herself gives relief to these intense feelings.

Yes, she needs to see a therapist ASAP.
ossobuco
 
  2  
Reply Sat 22 Dec, 2012 03:22 pm
@DrewDad,
Angel has been here a while and has described similar episodes.
She may also be another poster with similar difficulties, dirrtydozen22. Or not.

She, or both shes, seek attention from us, I take it as others are hard talking to her. DD had a therapist, not sure about Angel. They both have excellent language ability.

I'd like Angel to get better and talk with us, but I don't see her engaging with services that can or would help. Instead, she reaches out to the moon (us) who won't make demands.

I think all of this is not some fault of Angel's - we all have different minds.

0 Replies
 
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2012 07:56 am
@PUNKEY,
I don't feel rejected by my coworkers. It's not as if they prevented me from missing the party. My family is the one who made me miss it. And that really hurts. Even at work yesterday, I couldn't focus until I told my coworkers about my humiliation of missing the party. Talking about it felt so much better.
djjd62
 
  2  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2012 08:04 am
@Angel23,
i usually lost my will to live after going to the company christmas party

dj(and then i did what? Drunk Drunk Drunk Drunk Drunk )jd62
IRFRANK
 
  3  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2012 09:30 am
@Angel23,
Not another job. A counselor.
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2012 01:55 pm
@IRFRANK,
I have a counselor.
margo
 
  2  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2012 02:04 pm
@djjd62,
djjd62 wrote:

i usually lost my will to live after going to the company christmas party

dj(and then i did what? Drunk Drunk Drunk Drunk Drunk )jd62


Pretty much my reaction, too.

I didn't go this year. I've seen the photos. Staying home, locking myself in a dark room, with a blanket over my head was much preferable! Twisted Evil
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2012 02:10 pm
@margo,
Did u also cut yourself? I feel all alone right now, although I had sympathy from a few ppl. Wish my boss would understand. Maybe I'd actually have hours!
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2012 02:49 pm
@Angel23,
Angel23 wrote:
I have a counselor.


Then talk to him or her about this.
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2012 04:23 pm
@Angel23,
Why were you 'humiliated' about missing the party? Surely people understand family gatherings, especially at this time of year. How old are you, Angel23?

Edit: And why did you have to discuss this with your co-workers? I don't get that. You could just say that you were disappointed but that family comes first.
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 24 Dec, 2012 07:03 am
@Mame,
It's always a social humiliation whenever I don't go to parties I wanted to attend. And I discussed this with my coworkers bc they asked me what was wrong after I cried on the salesfloor. Wish I had a chance to discuss this with my supervisor. If I could get her sympaythy, maybe she'd be less hard on me and schedule me.
jespah
 
  6  
Reply Mon 24 Dec, 2012 09:22 am
@Angel23,
Your supervisor wants you to do your job. Whether your parents blocked you from attending the office Christmas party is not the supervisor's concern. I doubt she has even thought of it for more than, perhaps, a half a second (Oh, look, Angel23's not here. Gee, I wonder if the onion dip is any good).

I am sorry, but you continue to have zero sense of the proportion of the impact of your life choices on your colleagues. All your supervisor cares about is you getting your work done. All your colleagues care about is you doing your work and not getting them into trouble. People have basic sympathies (e. g. we try to comfort folks who are crying), but it's not like they want to hear your life story.

You have an exaggerated sense of your own importance in their lives. Please stop using them instead of therapy.
Angel23
 
  2  
Reply Mon 24 Dec, 2012 09:54 am
@jespah,
k. I get it. When will I have hours?
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Mon 24 Dec, 2012 11:10 am
@Angel23,
Maybe when you stop being a drama queen.
0 Replies
 
 

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