First impression screw-up... Need help!!

Oh and i've been riding for about 4 years... But why does this even matter?

I was talking to you, it is the horse that matters, dressage or jumping, and how you get along with the horse. Nothing about your possible fatness.

What I meant was being overweight affects ME. Neither of any of you guys know me personally so you wouldn't know.

See, this could be the problem. People are talking to you and you're jumping down their throats. Try listening and stop being so defensive.

I get that it affects you.

Not really arguing with that.

I'm saying that focusing on that one issue instead of addressing other things about your mindset suggests to me that you will keep finding something to blame for your confidence issues -- if not fat, something else.

Your hair, or your nose, or your teeth -- something.

Instead of just accepting yourself and figuring out how to interact with people in a more comfortable way.

Have you thought about seeing a counselor re: the social anxiety thing? I understand that you say it hasn't been officially diagnosed, but you seem to think that it's possible.

Not me, Efl. I was just commiserating with you, making small talk.



Cool!. I have only been on a jumper/English saddle once in my whole life. A friend who had two kids who were great at that took me for a ride thru a river valley. That was fun but I stayed to the short side of the downed logs.

I ride western and I think I would have felt as good or better had I been bareback.

I'm just interested, that's all. I like horses myself.

I am talking about barn society, I figure it is similar with dressage and other aspects of horseback riding. I mostly observed/heard adults riding and talking over a bunch of years. More than four. Nest of vipers is too strong a characterization, but let's say that relationships can get testy. There are antipathies, mockings, and camaraderie, and friendships. Learning how to deal with all that is a good idea.

Meanwhile you jumped at me for mentioning dressage. How would I know what form of riding or barn social life you are involved with?

I agree with listening to Sozobe too, generally speaking and in this situation in particular.

By the way, you write well. Some of us had trouble with the original post as we appreciate paragraphs, but you express yourself well.

I am listening but my mom tells me the same thing! Hahaha

Haha nice!!!!

Omg really? That's so cool!!!

I do?? Wait me???? If so, aw thank you that means so much coming from someone older!!!

Then why bother mentioning dressage or assuming that I take dressage? Lol, you could've just asked me straight up what I do. And that's Hunter/jumper.

See here: http://able2know.org/topic/193460-3#post-5044108