Can life have meaning if your dreams are unattainable?

I think you are perhaps looking at this in the wrong context, and you also ignored the other half of that post which mentioned just creativity, rather than creative intelligence....I even have suspicions that 'creative intelligence' is a furfy - that rather, it's more about people having one or two great idea's already, and being able to prove them before they are 30..

As for you use of creative intelligence being in the wrong context - surely you've looked at the great directors? Some are young, some are old.

Creativity in terms of directing, would be more to do with understanding of the characters, the story, and the audience (and how their emotions and thrills are generated). This one area where it's essential to learn how to influence peoples emotions (which could legitimately also be called 'manipulating' peoples emotions), how to excite them, how to make them fear etc. It would be about understanding the heroic journey. It would be about understanding the strength within all people, and how to bring it about. About how to create hope. About how to create admiration. Etc.

"Did she get the dream? You don't know that, watch as the years go by, if it gets that far."

Valid point.

My best friend told me he thinks Mary got engaged simply because all her girlfriends already are, because it's "the thing to do".

"you are being pig-headed and you are stopping you from going."

No. I want to go. Stacy told me not to. Before she said she wanted me there, but now that Mary's engaged the tune has changed.

What's a 'furfy'? Is that an Australian term?

"surely you've looked at the great directors? "

Oh yes. What makes me happier than anything is telling stories with pictures. So film, news, comic books, video, everything that falls under that umbrella is what I love.

I guess I just worry because like you were saying,

"it's more about people having one or two great idea's already, and being able to prove them before they are 30"

I haven't written anything new in a long time. I still have lots of old ideas, but even re-writes are difficult for me. It's just frustrating...

Coincidentally (since I see you are Australian) I just watched 'Gallipoli' for the first time. REALLY liked the cinematography...

"If I were to believe in Karma - I would say that it bites in different ways...and the timing can be short or ...rather long in the tooth."

I hope you're right. I'm going to think positive and believe you are...

So wow,

Today I was at a coffee shop. There was a girl sitting there reading a newly re-released comic book, coincidentally one of my favorite graphic novels of all time. And she was cute! And she was reading comics! So hot...

So I decided "Alright Mike, grow some balls and go talk to her...". So I did, in fact I got her laughing. So as she was leaving I told her that I don't frequently do this, but I was wondering if I could please have her phone number. And she said yes!

She told me to wait while she got a pen out of her car. I waited... until I saw her drive away.

So again, instead of just saying "no thanks, I'm not interested", it's easier for a woman to lie to get off easier...

I took a big step... I tried...

Learned helplessness... need I say more...

You can only touch that hot stove so many times before you realize it's gonna burn you every time...

I think deserve to get to say "Women are devils" to this, ...at least for today....

More likely is that you came off as a creeper, and that her response was appropriate for the situation. There is no short cut to fixing you. But you don't want to do the work, do you.........

Yep, its SOOOO creepy to see someone who has the same interests as you and try to start a LEGITIMATE conversation about them. And it's even creepier to get them laughing and feeling at ease...

Go **** yourself hawkeye...

But Mike, you did take that step, ok, so who's to say she didn't have a boyfriend and that was the way she chose to exit? I've done things like that before and driven away thinking, wow, he was funny or what a nice compliment.. We are cheaky sometimes too you know.

The bottom line is you took a step, instead of not taking one.

I just wonder though, it seems you feel you always have to make them laugh in order to attempt to ask them out? Why is that.

"so who's to say she didn't have a boyfriend"

She could have just said that. I wouldn't have reacted in a weird way. Lots of cute girls have boyfriends. How about honesty????

Lying is second nature to women, or so it would seem...

"I just wonder though, it seems you feel you always have to make them laugh in order to attempt to ask them out? Why is that."

What fun is life without humor...?

No, no, no, I never lie. In-fact that's my worse pet hate, liers.

There is a difference, don't see things all as black and white. She may have giggled, laughed but she may also have felt embarrased, or even shy.. Unless, you asked you you will never know but give people the benefit of the doubt. It's more than likely, she was embarrased and ran, so to speak. It' a white lie, not a blatant one, I doubt she meant to offend you definately, not hurt you.

Humor is good But, it can be a mask you hide behind. The point people have been telling you, is don't hide behind anything learn to be you and just be patient, you will always get rejection but not "always".

By the way I am an Aussie too. But, I'm guessing you know that..

Personally - I think there's a good likelihood that your current state of mind has more to do with that than your inate creativity.

Try writing a childrens tale, or write a new fairy tale - the latter is great because it doesn't even really have to make sense :
- the chicken that quacked
- the flying octopus
- the cat in the sack
- the boy who stole the kings crown jewels
- the dust fairies that cause rings around the moon
- etc

If you want 'serious' short story suggestions :
- a business deal gone wrong
- someones first puff of the wacky weed
- the alpha male takes a geek under his wings
- a lifesaver saves a child from drowning, mother falls for him...triangles suck
- etc

Ps...yes, they were all made up, and no, I didn't give them much thought.

Then you add in human idiocies, vulnerabilities, and silliness

Then add in something unforseen

You can throw in catch 22's, or no win situations, or heart rending separations, taking people way out of their comfort zones and watch them rise to the occasion, or any number of variables.

I could think of lots of things to add twists in, help people relate, inspire people, etc.

No - I've never written stories, except I guess, more than 20 years ago in high school.

Well I think you did very well approaching her (lots of guys don't actually have the balls to do that - so that is actually quite good)

...but I don't understand why you think that her taking off on you is a problem? Lot's of guys get rejected - with lots of girls taking the easy way out. Rather, look at it this way :

- great I had the balls to approach, and managed to get a few laughs...but it didn't end right. What did I recognise that I didn't do well, and what what can I try next to improve the likely results from the next one.

I read a book once called 'The power of focus', and it was by a concert pianist. This pianist was at a golf range learning with a group of friends, and they were learning golf shots under the direction of a golf coach. The pianist's friend all went for the biggest shots they could. The pianist talked to the coach and broke golf shots down into it's component parts, and concentrated on each part separately until could do that part 'naturally' (without thinking) and then moved on to learning (in the same way) the next component part to a golf shot, and then on to the next...

...and while his friends attended once a week, he knew that in order for something to become natural, he had to practice very regularly - so he came several times a week, and practiced each component until each felt 'natural'.

...the result was that his friends were hitting much 'much better' shots for the first several weeks....but by the end, he was by far the best golfer.

What he said was 'being a concert pianist, I knew that all life was process, and with process, practice makes perfect'. To a rather large extent, I quite agree that life is process (habit / learned skills etc), and that practicing often until natural is the way to go.

...if you went for your first golf lesson - would you expect to make decent shots?

...if you didn't pay attention to the coach (or to the results), and didn't think about how to improve, would you improve?

...if you didn't learn to the component parts to a good golf shot, do you think you would ever truly get good at golf?

...or would your golf be a lot of hit and miss?

...the less you practiced, the more likely you would miss, or do a crap shot?

" I doubt she meant to offend you definately, not hurt you."

Maybe not, but I still think that's shitty. And selfish. I've never done that kind of thing to someone. There have been girls who have expressed interest in me, and if I wasn't interested I just let that be known.

There was a girl I had a big crush on my second year in college. I waited till the last day of the semester (mostly because I'd tried inside my own head to ask her out numerous times and couldn't work up the courage). So I finally asked her and she said yes. Then I wound up calling her number only to find out it was an auto parts store...

I bet Australia is a cool place to live. I've heard good things about it. Plus it gave us Elle McPherson right? ...she's so pretty

"Personally - I think there's a good likelihood that your current state of mind has more to do with that than your inate creativity."

I hope you're right. Because I feel like I have a lot of stories to tell.

"Try writing a childrens tale, or write a new fairy tale"

Children's stories are actually probably my favorite (but it's hard to choose just one genre/style). One of my dreams has always been to make an epic children's movie, like the ones I grew up watching...

"...but I don't understand why you think that her taking off on you is a problem? Lot's of guys get rejected - with lots of girls taking the easy way out."

It feeds into what I already believe to be true about women vikorr. I get what you're saying 'practice makes perfect', but I've gone over it in my head... It only lasted a few minutes and I can't place what I did wrong.

I approached with my shoulders up, made eye contact, kept the conversation going, made jokes, got smiles from her, got laughs from her.

It's really hard to look at instances like these without having them reinforce my views that women lie...

Or maybe she just changed her mind, having thought it through on the way from the coffee shop to her car to get a pen, (which is sort of weird in itself).
So none of the waitresses in the coffee shop could lend either of you a pen?
She had to walk all the way out to the car to get a pen? And anyway, didn't either of you have a mobile - one of you could have just taken the other's number and then called and then you'd both have each other's number?
But whatever.

I can't think of one instance in which I gave a guy I didn't really know my number. If I'm out socializing and I have a nice chat with someone and they want to exchange numbers, but I don't really know them, I take THEIR number and then I decide either to call or not call them.
As a woman, I wouldn't hand out my number to strangers.
Maybe she thought the whole thing through and came to a safer conclusion for herself.
If it were my daughter, I wouldn't want her giving out her number to strangers in coffee shops, especially not someone who studiously and consciously complies with the rules of 'good communication' because he's reminded himself of how to 'look' appropriate...including eye contact, etc., etc.
Maybe you came across as too self-aware and studied and thus a little creepy.

Maybe you just seem too eager. That can be a REAL red flag to a woman. I have a friend at work with whom I share alot of laughs, etc. and as we were walking out one day he said, 'We should have a beer together sometime,' and I said, 'Sure- that'd be fun.'
And then he turned it into a meal that he would buy for me and that made me uncomfortable, wondering, 'Okay, does he have expectations beyond friendship?' so I said, straight out, 'I'm not interested in a relationship beyond friendship Steve,' and he said, 'Oh, I know....' and then yesterday he walked up to me and said, 'When are we going out?'
I said, 'You mean for that beer? I only work half a day on Friday, you want to meet up on the way home from work?'
And he said, 'Well, I work the whole day Friday - but I'll take the day off...'
And I was like, 'WHAT?!- NO - take a day off to stop off and have a beer?!'

And that just made me so uncomfortable - that he doesn't seem to be listening to what I'm saying and his agenda is so different from mine.
I probably DO know him well enough to tell him the truth about why I'll be less comfortable and avoiding him from now on, but you know, these women that you call 'liars' maybe they're just trying to avoid uncomfortable situations and scenes with men they don't really know who come on too strong.

Once we move from women giving creepers the brush-off to your scenario where women refuse to speak their minds because they want to take the easy way out you lose me. Women are adults, and have a responsibility to act like adults, not scared little girls. Do men everywhere a solid....put your big girl panties on and tell this guy what you think of his behavior.

So who's not acting like an adult here?

Yeah, I guess it would have been more considerate and polite of this girl to walk back in and say to the guy, 'You know, I thought about it and I don't want to give you my number,' so he wouldn't stand there waiting, but I'd call what she did, walking out to her car and just driving away instead of doing what she said she was going to do, more impolite than immature.
Her actions communicated her thoughts. She didn't have to speak her mind.

"She had to walk all the way out to the car to get a pen?"

Right!?!?!? A lie right there! 100% bullshit!

"I can't think of one instance in which I gave a guy I didn't really know my number."

Firefly for one told me I shouldn't beat around the bush; ask for the digits right away. You see there's so many weird nuances with women, how is a man ever supposed to navigate them correctly? It's a complete crap shoot as far as I can see. For all I know, I should've just walked up and slapped her on the ass...

"Maybe you came across as too self-aware and studied and thus a little creepy."

The first thing I said to her was that the artist of the book she was reading really knows how to draw funny looking butt cracks (It was the only thing I could think of on the fly. And the comic she was reading is kind of an underground thing so it was an appropriate comment.) I got a good hard chuckle from her to this...

I don't think I came on strong at all. We talked about comics and I told her she had good taste. I didn't compliment her in any other way...