osso -- Somehow I recognize nothing of every relationship I have had in hawkeye's commentary. Before I met my ex-husband, I had a pants suit that I loved. It consisted of a tunic and pants. The tunic had a U-neck and short sleeves. What he disliked were the two tiny tucks on the sleeves and on the pants. Whenever I wore the outfit, he spoke constantly of the tucks, telling me that the garment was obviously too long and that is how I shortened it. That was preferred to the way he usually handled things of mine he disliked: he broke them.
I have never encountered a man who didn't feel free to comment negatively and loudly on things he disliked. I wore a pink blouse and maroon skirt to meet a man I encountered through an on-line dating service. We agreed to meet a second time. During the second meeting -- he had changed locations in order to meet at a place he frequented with his late wife -- he made a point of telling me that he could not tolerate maroon and that he hated maroon and pink as a combination.
In my opinion,
that is appropriate only in the most extreme
otherwise, politeness requires reticence.
I 've only done it ONCE
, when I took a chick who I knew very well
to dinner at (the late, much lamented) Tavern on the Green.
Said chick, Joan, elected to wear what I think is called "a house dress".
(I don't know much about womens' clothes.)
I thawt that she was conspicuously underdressed (which was out of character for her).
I commented on it (certainly not "loudly") and I suggested
that she resume her former mode of dress for attending good restaurants.
I am 1OO% confident that if the situation had been reversed,
she surely woud have been as candid in her sartorial criticism.
Joan knew how to be critical; she had profuse n abundant practice of it.