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The Republican Nomination For President: The Race For The Race For The White House

 
 
Frank Apisa
 
  0  
Reply Fri 17 Feb, 2012 09:00 pm
@spendius,
Quote:
No. I can but fear it would get you all a tremble.

Provide a start point and I'll consider it. "Across a crowded room" if you like or walking into to massage parlour or a British Legion day trip in a coach to the Lakes.

You're being coy by staying comfortingly abstract.


Does that translate into, "I can't, but I am unwilling to acknowledge that I cannot?"
0 Replies
 
Frank Apisa
 
  0  
Reply Fri 17 Feb, 2012 09:04 pm
@spendius,
You wrote:


Quote:
Natural methods are 100% guaranteed.
The natural method is two healthy adults rolling in the hay naked and having fun and determined to produce no after effects and knowing how not to.


Describe them. Tell me what "natural method" is 100% guaranteed.
reasoning logic
 
  1  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 03:53 am
@Frank Apisa,
Quote:
Describe them. Tell me what "natural method" is 100% guaranteed.


Do you think he is talking about the "naturally gay method"? Wink
Frank Apisa
 
  1  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 06:16 am
@reasoning logic,
Quote:
Do you think he is talking about the "naturally gay method"?


Truthfully, RL, I do not know what Spendius is talking about.

I cannot think of any "natural method" that is 100% sure...or even remotely close to 100% sure (other than abstinence, which he says is not his point)...so I would love for him to enlighten us.

I doubt that will happen...and I am not interested in trying to bug him about this. He will either answer or evade answering as he sees fit.

But if he truly knows of a 100% effective "natural method" he should share it with the world, because apparently nobody else in the world does know it. As I understand things, the "artificial contraception" methods are much, much more effective than any "natural" ones.
spendius
 
  0  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 07:40 am
@Frank Apisa,
You're being coy Frank. I used the word "determined". Did you not notice it? It wasn't a cliche. It's all anybody needs. One can't slip up if one is 100% determined.

No doubt you have made a mess of some trivial action in your time, spilling your drink say, but you were probably not determined enough not to spill it. You were reaching for it whilst giving your agnosticism speech. Say. Try reaching for a drink determined not to spill it. Supposing you were sentenced to a lifetime of domestic, marital bliss, and one can have marital bliss minus the domesticity, if you did spill it.

I think I will back you to succeed as near 100% of the time as makes no difference. Unless, of course, domestic, marital bliss is the objective. Just as spilling a drink might be done on purpose.

Now, suppose domestic, marital bliss was not your objective, and men have run away to sea to avoid it, or joined the French Foreign Legion because it is an organisation that keeps its member's names secret, or forced with a shotgun to accept it, then, and it follows logically, you are a mug. A sap. A butterfly in the net.

Does that give you an idea what I mean by determined. I'm not concerning myself with half-baked determination which is what the failures you elicit in support of your position actually must be.

With 100% determination on the matters in hand there is no chance of failure and the descriptions of procedures lend themselves to that wonderful trick Laurence Sterne used when he left a blank page in his masterpiece for the reader's use. The most graceful compliment to his readers that I ever did see.

In the interests of clarity and avoiding more of your damn fool questions I will take the trouble to bring you the passages concerned.

Quote:
Let love therefore be what it will,----my Uncle Toby fell into it.
------And possibly, gentle reader, with such a temptation----so wouldst thou: For never did thy eyes behold, or thy concupisence covet any thing in this world, more concupisible than widow Wadman.


Those are the last words in Chapter XXXVII of Volume VI. It's a bit wittier that saying she was a hottie.

Chapter XXXVIII goes--

Quote:
To conceive this right,---call for pen and ink----here's paper ready to your hand----Sit down, Sir, paint her to your own mind---as like your mistress as you can----as unlike your wife as your conscience will let you---'tis all one to me----please but your own fancy in it.


The rest of the page is blank as is the following page.


































On turning over the chapter ends--

Quote:
-----Was ever any thing in Nature so sweet! ----so exquisite!
-----Then, dear Sir, how could my uncle Toby resist it?
Thrice happy book! thou wilt have one page , at least, within thy covers, which MALICE will not blacken, and which IGNORANCE cannot misrepresent.


Each to his own. Whatever floats your boat. Just be determined.
farmerman
 
  2  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 07:47 am
@spendius,
now I am convinced that spendi is a retired parson in the CAtholic Church. The reason is is because he actually believes the **** hes attempting to pass out.

All you have to be is "determined" . That makes as much sense as his stance on science while claiming that he is a chemist. Nope, hes a naive little country parson whose never gotten laid in his life and never sweated out a few weeks of "being late"
spendius
 
  0  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 07:48 am
@spendius,
It's as easy as falling off a log Frank. And much more fun.
0 Replies
 
Frank Apisa
 
  0  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 07:51 am
@spendius,
Spendius, obviously you are never going to answer the question...because there is no 100% sure “natural method.”

But it is fun to ask.


Originally you wrote:

Quote:
Natural methods are 100% guaranteed.
The natural method is two healthy adults rolling in the hay naked and having fun and determined to produce no after effects and knowing how not to.


The “knowing how not to” is the part I am asking you to explain.

What is that “natural method” that will be 100% effective if the adults are “determined?”

Just tell us, Spendius…or acknowledge that you cannot.
farmerman
 
  1  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 07:57 am
@Frank Apisa,
as I learnt in 5th grade'What do we call people who practice the rhythm method of birth control?"
parados
 
  1  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 08:05 am
A little story this morning that Gingrich is getting another $10 million to his superpac from Las Vegas gambling man Adelson.
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  0  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 08:10 am
@farmerman,
Very funny fm. My post got me into the right frame of mind to have a good laugh at your inadequate straw-grasping technique.

I certainly never did do any "being late" sweatings. Those sorts of events are due to a falling off of determination and any falling off at all in that and determination has flown the coop.



Contraception allows complete relaxation of the determination afore to mentioned and its objective is thus obviously to facilitate male orgasm. That such an objective be subsidised by tax dollars is what Mr Obama's proposal sought to do.

Frank Apisa
 
  4  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 08:15 am
@farmerman,
Parents???
0 Replies
 
Frank Apisa
 
  0  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 08:19 am
@spendius,
Quote:
I certainly never did do any "being late" sweatings. Those sorts of events are due to a falling off of determination and any falling off at all in that and determination has flown the coop.



Contraception allows complete relaxation of the determination afore to mentioned and its objective is thus obviously to facilitate male orgasm. That such an objective be subsidised by tax dollars is what Mr Obama's proposal sought to do.


Please, please, Spendius...tell me you are not going to use "withdrawal" or "no orgasm" as your "natural method."

No...you wouldn't.

Surely you realize both of those would be FAR from 100% effective.
spendius
 
  0  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 08:27 am
@Frank Apisa,
Quote:
Spendius, obviously you are never going to answer the question...because there is no 100% sure “natural method.”


You know very well that I can't. You just have the wrong reason.

Take the contraception away after explaining the joys of domestic, marital bliss without it, as portrayed in Coronation Street for example, and see what happens. Fear is the mother of determination.

Frank Apisa
 
  3  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 08:36 am
@spendius,
Quote:
You know very well that I can't. You just have the wrong reason.

Take the contraception away after explaining the joys of domestic, marital bliss without it, as portrayed in Coronation Street for example, and see what happens. Fear is the mother of determination.


C'mon, Spendius. You can say it!

There is no 100% natural method of contraception except for abstinence. In fact, you can even acknowledge the truth of the effectiveness of "natural methods" versus "artificial methods."

You can say it...none of us will think less of you for it.

And while you are at it, you can also say what you suppose to be the 100% artificial method.


blueveinedthrobber
 
  1  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 08:55 am
@Frank Apisa,
Where there's a will there's a way Mr. Green

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v288/stevetheq/BackDoorFriends.jpg
DrewDad
 
  1  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 09:04 am
@Frank Apisa,
Frank Apisa wrote:
because there is no 100% sure “natural method.”

I think you just lack imagination.
Frank Apisa
 
  1  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 09:12 am
@DrewDad,
Quote:
I think you just lack imagination.


Okay...you answer the question. What "natural method" (other than abstinence) is 100% sure?
Frank Apisa
 
  1  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 09:13 am
@blueveinedthrobber,
Yeah, but we are trying to come to a "natural method" that will pass muster with the people who are against artificial birth control. Somehow, I doubt they are touting back door entry.
reasoning logic
 
  1  
Reply Sat 18 Feb, 2012 09:14 am
@Frank Apisa,
You didn't like blueveinedthrobber's answer?
 

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