Hey, Can A Woman "Ask To Get Raped"?

Los Altos police: Man called women, threatening to rape them
By Diana Samuels
Daily News Staff Writer
Posted: 10/06/2010

A man accused of telephoning Peninsula women and threatening to rape them has been charged with multiple felonies in Santa Clara County and could face several more in San Mateo County, police said.

Los Altos police arrested Allen Anthony Fedele, a 49-year-old South San Francisco resident and delivery driver, on Sept. 21, the department announced Tuesday. Fedele allegedly made hundreds of phone calls, beginning in mid-June, threatening sexual assault, according to Sgt. Scott McCrossin of the Los Altos Police Department.

Fedele's female victims ranged in age from 12 to 76, McCrossin said, and were in cities including Los Altos, Mountain View, Palo Alto, Redwood City, Redwood Shores and Pacifica. One victim was from the Southern California city of Glendale.

"Generally speaking it was random (which women he called), but he did have a pattern he was following," McCrossin said, declining to elaborate.

One woman received 60 calls, McCrossin said. If a man answered the phone Fedele would hang up, McCrossin said, and he only left voicemails if the answering machine recording had a woman's voice.

"(The calls) were not benign," he said, though he declined to go into detail. "They were calls that would probably put some fear in people."

The calls came from a blocked number, which led police to obtain warrants for phone records, McCrossin said. They used Fedele's records to identify him as a suspect as well as 25 victims, including 10 from Los Altos. The effort to identify additional victims is currently on hold, McCrossin said.

"It got to a point where we ID'd so many victims it would have just overwhelmed us," he said.

Fedele was booked into the Santa Clara County Main Jail and was later released on a $25,000 bond, police said. The Santa Clara County District Attorney's Office has charged him with seven felony counts of stalking, two felony counts of making terrorist threats, one misdemeanor count of annoying and molesting a child, and seven misdemeanor counts of making annoying and harassing phone calls.

A San Mateo County law enforcement agency also plans to file charges against Fedele soon, McCrossin said.
http://www.mercurynews.com/breaking-news/ci_16274005

Survey reveals higher rate of violence against Alaska women
ALASKA: 59 percent of women in poll experienced violence, threats.

By LISA DEMER
[email protected]
10/01/10 20:32:26)

The first survey of Alaska women about sexual assault and domestic violence found that more than half had been victimized at some point in their life and about one in eight had been victimized in the year before the survey.

The University of Alaska Anchorage Justice Center surveyed 871 Alaska adult women by telephone in May and June under a $280,000 state grant. Women were picked randomly. Researchers called cell phone and land line numbers from across the state.

For years, Alaska has struggled with high rates of sexual assault and domestic violence, but those findings are most often based on crimes reported to law enforcement. The new survey found much higher rates:

• Overall, almost 59 percent of the women surveyed said they had experienced physical violence or threats of it from a partner, or sexual violence from anyone, at some point in their lives, the survey found. If that percentage holds true for the population as a whole, that means an estimated 145,000 Alaska women have been victimized, said Andre Rosay, Justice Center director and the lead researcher.

• Nearly 27 percent of the women said that over their lifetime they had had unwanted sex when they were drunk, high or passed out, and unable to consent. Almost as many had been sexually assaulted after being subjected to physical force or threats, the survey found.

• During the year previous to the survey, close to 12 percent of the women said that they had experienced sexual violence or domestic violence or threats of it. About 9 percent said they had suffered physical violence at the hands of a romantic or sexual partner including being slapped, kicked, pushed, beaten, burned or choked.

• Also in the past year, 2.5 percent said they had been sexually assaulted, which doesn't count those too disoriented to give consent because of drinking or drugs.

That means an estimated 6,181 Alaska women had been victims of sexual assaults in one year's time, Rosay said. Of those, maybe 3,700 had been forced into vaginal sex, meeting the FBI definition of forcible rape used in crime reporting.

In comparison, there were 503 forcible rapes reported to Alaska law enforcement in 2009, according to statistics collected by the state Department of Public Safety for the FBI uniform crime report.

Gov. Sean Parnell said the findings confirm that Alaska is in the midst of an epidemic of sexual and domestic violence.
http://www.adn.com/2010/09/30/v-printer/1480089/survey-finds-high-rates-of-sexual.html

Our view: This must change
Grim numbers about violence against women demand action
October 2nd, 2010

Gov. Sean Parnell was right in August when he said we can't be a decent, good society -- no matter what our wealth -- unless we reverse Alaska's chronic epidemic of sexual assault and domestic violence.

A survey of Alaska women by the University of Alaska Anchorage Justice Center tells us that epidemic is worse than we thought. The survey found that more than half the women contacted reported being victimized at some point in their lives, and one in eight during the year before the survey.

When a veteran Alaska law enforcement officer like Audie Holloway, director of the Alaska State Troopers, says he finds the numbers shocking, that should get everyone's attention.

So what do we do to change it, besides wringing our hands and shaking our heads?

"We need to stop blaming the victims of sexual assault," says Nancy Haag, director of Standing Together Against Rape (STAR). Haag says that blame remains more prevalent -- sometimes unconsciously so -- than many people believe.

That change helps the victim -- and puts the blame squarely and entirely where it belongs -- on the perpetrator.

Yes, we should be realistic about warning girls and women -- and boys and men too -- away from dangerous situations. But with that warning should always come a clear distinction -- a violent attack is never the victim's fault, no matter what she's wearing, where she's gone, who she's with. Haag points out that some victims do everything "right." No blame should fall to any victim.

The standard should be simple -- no matter where a woman or girl may go in this city or state, from her living room to a downtown bar to a bike trail at midnight, she should be safe. If she's not, it's the predator's fault, not hers.

Haag adds that assailants look for victims. Sexual assault and domestic violence are not accidental crimes. Perpetrators target the vulnerable.

She points out that citizens can help protect the vulnerable. If a situation looks wrong, don't hesitate to call 911. With the prevalence of cell phones, being a good Samaritan has never been easier. Don't be afraid that you're overreacting. Make the call, and let police officers take it from there. If the situation is urgent but you feel you can't directly intervene, create a distraction. Honk a horn if you're in a vehicle. Make some other noise. Alert other people nearby.

The point is to create a community where we don't turn away from sexual assault or domestic violence, but rally to their victims -- and stand up to the perpetrators.

Or better, prevent the violence in the first place. To that end, Haag recommends education from an early age about how we treat one another. To regard anyone as less deserving of basic respect, as if their humanity isn't equal to ours, is wrong. That bullying isn't to be appeased or feared, but reviled.

And, because most of the assailants in sexual and domestic violence crimes are men, we need to promote a culture that defines manhood with a standard of self-control, not self-indulgence, where being a man means the kind of strength that protects, defends and respects women and children, that handles the friction of relationships with patience. That standard allows for anger, for frustration -- but never out of control, never across that line.

"Where are our role models?" Haag asks rhetorically. They're out there, men of strength, kindness and care. They need to be the norm, setting the standard that boys and young men aspire to.

Aside from personal choices, Haag also suggested some policy initiatives. One is swift justice, which may require more prosecutors. Now, a victim may wait years for justice while a perpetrator remains free. Another is mandatory treatment for convicted sex offenders and batterers, and closer supervision after their release from prison. She'd also like to see follow-up surveys to refine information from different parts of the state.

Haag does see hope and some progress. She says that not many years ago, she could empty a room by bringing up the topic of sexual assault. Not so now.

Her ideal is to work herself out of her position, to see a day when sexual assault and domestic violence is "an anomaly, not just another 24-hour period in Anchorage, Alaska."

That's a challenge we can all help to meet.

BOTTOM LINE: Report puts some numbers on what many Alaskans already knew about sexual assault and domestic violence. May the shock move us to change it.
adn.com

Thank Goodness for the Good Men
Randy Susan Meyers
Posted: October 7, 2010

"Women decided long ago that they wanted men's violence against them to stop. Men, as a gender, have not made that decision. When we do decide and act on that decision, violence against women will end."

The above is written on the wall of the website of Men Ending Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault in Texas. I thought about the truth in those words as I read these horrifying ones:

"Four armed men barged into Anna Mburano's hut, slapped the children and threw them down. They flipped Mrs. Mburano on her back, she said, and raped her, repeatedly." Thus begins the New York Times article Frenzy of Rape in Congo Reveals U.N. Weakness.

Mrs. Mburano is eighty-years old.

I don't even know where to start on my thoughts. My breakfast cereal soured as I read the article.

And lest we think this is a problem of other countries, other cultures, a recent story about a girl raped in America tells us "Tina Anderson was only 15 when she said she was forced to stand terrified before her entire Baptist congregation to confess her "sin" -- she had become pregnant. What she wasn't allowed to tell the group was that the pregnancy was the result of being raped by a church deacon, a man twice her age."

Each time an article goes online about domestic violence, a rash of subsequent replies appear, accusing women of being just as bad or worse, as though there is a contest to win, as though denying the truth that all people of good will can work together.

Good men know that women writing about women getting hurt is not a statement that men are never hurt. It's not a statement that women are all perfect. It's simply a statement about stopping violence against women. It's an essay asking how do we end the violence and where does it start?

How do we teach our daughters and sons? Whose responsibility is it? Does it belong to men or to women to stop emotional and physical violence towards women?

For years we've educated women about domestic violence and about ways to stay safe on the streets (Carry a whistle! Don't go out after dark! Dress appropriately! Don't walk alone on the streets! Learn the warning signs of domestic abuse!)

While we educate women on how to remain safe, can we also teach men how to be non-violent on the streets and at home?

In women's restrooms signs are affixed to the back of stalls asking: Are You Being Hurt? Underneath those words will be a number to call for help -- a local domestic violence shelter, or perhaps a domestic violence hotline.

Where are the signs in the men's rooms asking: Are You Hurting The Woman You Love? Underneath those words there could be a number to call -- a hotline where men can learn to change -- because the way I see it (even in my most hopeless moments, like when I read about an 80-year-old woman being raped by a gang of young soldiers) we can learn to be better.

I pray, especially in this month of Domestic Violence Awareness, that men will notice all the strong and good men preaching against using violence against women as a tool in war -- whether they be the wars in our homes or the wars in our streets.

For these men strong enough to fight this fight, I am thankful:

Men Against Domestic Violence, in Seattle.

Strong Men Don't Bully in Gloucester Massachusetts.

Be There For Your Kids in Colorado.

Muslim Men Against Domestic Violence.

Men Against Domestic Violence in California.

These are the men who understand love and the meaning of being a father. These are the men who are willing to take a stand:

The Good Men Project.

Men Can Stop Rape.

Nicholas D. Kristof.

Ten Things Men Can Do to Stop Rape.

Men's Anti-Violence Council at University of Iowa.

Professor Abdoulaye Saine of the Miami University in Oxford, Ohio, The Gambia Echo.

Thanks to all the good men, unafraid to stand up and be counted.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/randy-susan-meyers/post_995_b_749416.html

Women cop blame (again) for sex assault
Nina Funnell
October 7, 2010 - 10:12AM

No men, including footballers, are entitled to sex with drunk women.

Women ask to be raped. Women fabricate rape allegations to assuage guilt. Rape victims are sluts and strays. These are some of the attitudes that have been unearthed this week following a police investigation into sexual assault allegations made by a 20-year-old woman.

The woman alleges she was the victim of a sexual assault involving a number of men, including two Collingwood players. The incident was said to have occurred in South Melbourne on Sunday morning, just hours after Collingwood defeated St Kilda in the grand final rematch.

While the accused must be presumed innocent until proved otherwise, cases such as this highlight problems in broader community attitudes towards sex, consent and women.

Retired AFL star Peter "Spida" Everitt used Twitter to suggest that the woman only made the sexual assault complaint after waking up with a hangover and a guilty conscience. The tweet read, "Yet another alleged girl, making alleged allegations, after she awoke with an alleged hangover and, I take it, an alleged guilty conscience.''

On Channel Seven's Sunrise, he went on to say that players are the real victims, a claim that was reinforced by Channel Nine's Kerri-Anne Kennerley, who expressed sympathy for the players who put themselves ''in harm's way'' by the "strays" they pick up.

And we wonder why some young men have difficulty respecting women.

In another tweet, Everitt wrote: ''Girls!! When will you learn! At 3am when you are blind drunk & you decide to go home with a guy ITS NOT FOR A CUP OF MILO!''

Concerningly, statements like these encourage men to believe they are entitled to have sex with vulnerable women, and women to believe they are not entitled to say ''no'' once drunk or alone with a man. In other words, "girls" who are "blind drunk" are just asking for it.

According to social commentator Melinda Tankard Reist, people are rightly offended by Kennerley and Everitt's statements because they reinforce a wider belief that women are responsible for sexual assault and that it is acceptable to blame the victim. "I think he should apologise for that," says Tankard Reist.

In attempting to clarify his position, Everitt tweeted, "My comments are solely aimed at warning females of the danger of being drunk or under the influence of drugs."

"You can't sit there and try and blame somebody else when you've put yourself in that situation," he said on Sunrise.

Feminist author Emily Maguire fired back with a tweet of her own: "We 'females' have been receiving such warnings our whole lives. Consider directing your advice to the blokes next time."

Unfortunately, many people still put the onus on women to modify their behaviour in order to forward manage the poor behaviour of a small group of men.

Others mistakenly believe that most rapes occur down dark alleys and are committed by strangers in balaclavas.

But fewer than 1 per cent of sexual assaults are committed by complete strangers. The reality is that about 70 per cent are committed by a family member, friend, or school or work colleague.

In the remaining cases, the assault is committed by someone the victim met that night, usually at a bar, club or party. In these cases, alcohol or drugs are often a factor.

But rather than telling women not to drink, we need to be teaching all young people the consent laws. If a person is blind drunk to the point of passing out, then they do not have the capacity to give consent.

This is not just the opinion of feminists. This is the law in all Australian states and territories.

Similarly, if a person consents to sex with one or two or even three people, this does not mean they have consented to having sex with a fourth. If a person consents to one sexual act, they have not consented to all sexual acts. A person can withdraw consent at any time during the sex act (though not after it). Any level of force or coercion legally negates free consent.

Obeying the law is important. But we would be wise to acknowledge that there is an awful lot of behaviour that goes on that may not technically be criminal or illegal but is unethical and degrading. Respect and consideration for others' well-being is key.

Attitudes that shift the onus of responsibility on to victims by blaming them for their dress or behaviour do not only excuse sexual assault. These attitudes also excuse the practise of people not caring for, or actively respecting, their partner's well-being.

Similarly, when individuals such as Everitt imply that women "cry rape" in order to assuage guilt, they not only reinforce the tired notion that it is natural and expected for a woman to feel ''guilt'' over sex, but they also deter other victims from coming forward for fear of not being believed.

The reality is that one in five women in Australia will experience some form of sexual assault. An estimated 85 per cent of them will never report it to police. Under-reporting, not falsified reporting, is the real problem. Clearly there is work ahead.

Nina Funnell is a researcher in the Journalism and Media Research Centre at the University of NSW.
http://www.smh.com.au/opinion/society-and-culture/women-cop-blame-again-for-sex-assault-20101006-167pp.html?from=smh_sb

Quote:

Quite great work if I understand it right.

is it your contention that a study of 1948 sexuality is relevant in 2010??

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I've researched it myself. I don't care what those trolls

You know what I also find odds with the women here is the almost the delighted tones they had at times taken over rape news stories and how they fight tooths and nails any facts that rapes is happily far less common then the almost science fiction/fantasy claims of the Feminist movement.

Firefly one posting on a college rape was interesting see see see college rapes is far too common.

Well Firefly one rape in the whole country a year would be far too common but putting out nonsense that one if four college women will be rape does not help for a numbers of reasons.