@chai2,
Oh, btw, yes....my brother pissed away a fortune. But it wasn't my fortune he pissed away, it was his heritance, and no concern to me.
Yes, I'm 60. I think the last conversation of more than 20 seconds I've had with that brother was when I was about 18. Since age 40 or so I haven't talked to him at all. Not on purpose, just never did. I only found out a few month ago he had been taking meth. That was because his daughter somehow reached out to me, because she was curious about the aunt she had never met. The last time I saw her she was in a stroller, and wasn't talking yet. No idea how it started, the meth, or when. Don't care. Not my monkey, not my circus.
My husband is 12 years older than me. Personally I don't call that "much older than me". We met at 29 and 41. We married at about 35 and 47. Where is the problem?
Yes, he has, and will always have drug issues. Yes, he has wasted a lot of money on perscription drugs. But not near all our money. Otherwise, I wouldn't outright own 2 houses, the 2nd of which I paid readily available cash for. Please, don't worry about my money kid or izzy. My net worth is quite healthy thank you.
To get this drug thing out of the way, boring as it is....
The main cause of his health issues are because of ventrical fib, CHF, COPD, Chronic pain from multiple broken bones and nerve damage due to a motorcycle accident in his youth. His perscription drug abuse comes from, after years of taking them properly, the pain increased to a much higher level (he had undergone more orthopedic surgeries, and when they implanted his first defibrillator, it was pressing on a nerve, that is a very long story) , and, at the same time, politics in this country were punishing pain management clincis by preventing them from supplying their choice of drugs, one's they know will work, for their patients. So, in seeking out releif from pain that would keep him in bed for days at a time, preventing him from being able to eat, causing weight loss which included muscle loss, even of the heart, further lowering his already low ejection fraction, he turned to buying them illegally. He became addicted to opiods.
Back in Oct of 2018, he was finally allowed to try a drug that is normally reserved for people coming off of opiods, even though his pain management doctors weren't perscibing him opiods at the time (they were in the past, then the change in what they can do, so they perscribed him things that didn't help. Their hands were tied.
The name of the drug is Suboxone, also known as buprenorphine and naloxone. As well as taking care of the withdrawl from opiods, it also appeared to work pretty well for pain. He should have been fine with just that, and, at the present time he is. However, between November and mid January, he was still going out and buying another drug that is a muscle relaxer, call Soma, aka carisoprodol. It made him a mess, and he refused to see it. After his continued deterioration starting in Dec and ending in Mid January, being admitted to the hosptial 3 separate time for pneumonia, stuff I can't even in my mind keep track of because so much happened so fast, ending with his big fall which broke more bones and teeth, he was hospitalized and put into a physical therapy rehab long enough for him to realize the Soma needed to go, and since then the suboxone, along with his myriad of over medications, appears to be doing well. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. I sure don't
So kid, if you think you are somehow "outing" me, shaming me, think again. There it is, in black and white. Addiction is addiction. He hated taking the oxy, and doesn't care for some of his heart meds, because they inhibit his sexual performance. We both have always enjoyed a very healthy sex life. My opinion is some of his other drug use came from depression of not being able to have sex with me the way he wanted, because he really loves having sex with me. I love having sex with him. Being 60 and 72 respectively not not mean sexual desire goes away. Surprise kid, I really like to ****, so does he. I guess you'll have to insult me about that too, or tell me you didn't need or want to know. Guess what, I don't need or want to know about your private life either, but there you go.
So get off this thing, the both of you, that because of whatever age I am I don't understand what people of another age are going through, or that no deaths, tragedies, illness or anything else painful has happened. In fact kid, take your age, and add on the years to get to mine, and imagine what will happen to you in that time.
I find this really curious. How someone in their 20's, who has had maybe 5 to 10 years of adult life, somehow imagines they have more life experience than someone who has dealt with adulthood, relationships, hardships, deaths, joys, failures, success etc than someone who's been practicing it for 40 plus years. Like the longer you live, the less has happened.
Izzy, has your losing your spouse, having kids with challenges, somehow deadened you to the fact everyone has their ****?
I don't talk about my **** much here, because it's my ****. Not something to hide, but it's mine, and I know that one really wants to hear about my ****, because they have their own.
I opened up and talking a little about my **** awhile back, because it reached a head, and I felt very powerless. Lately, well, until this post, I went back to not talking about my **** to the strangers here, because I said it and don't need to rehash it out. Now apparantly with the kid it's become a competition of "my **** is worse than your ****" Including how my **** is my fault because I'm such an awful person. Like I'm going to hide the fact I have ****. Naw, I'm just adult enough to not make it all about me.
kid, you got ****. It's your **** not mine. Neither one of us has **** because we're awful or miserable or whatever else you've called me here and in PMs.
You've got **** because everyone has ****.
Deal with your ****, and stop calling every preceived insult out, or you'll do nothing in your life but be constantly calling everyone out.
Ya gotta let it go kid. Stop trying to change everyone around you to suit you, and look to yourself. You told me in a PM that you think you're wonderful.
Well then act wonderful, not like a scorekeeper of wrongs done to you.
Life short kid, believe me. I have no idea how I got to the number that the calander tell me. Funny thing, if you were to ask me "how old are you?" If I didn't think about it, I pop out with "35? 40?" Although 60 is far far from old. I'm gong to live to 100 I'm sure.
Tomorrow kid, you're gonna wake up, and someone is going to tell you that you're 60, as if they think they're insulting you. And you're gonna laugh to yourself because you wouldn't go back for all the tea in China. Christ I would hate to have to be in my 20's again. Way too much drama. Like feeling like you have to call everyone out because they said a word.
One of the big tells of your youth and inexperience is that you truly feel you are hurting someone by whatever it is you're saying.
Why do you want to hurt someone anyway? Because you think they hurt you? Because you're going to hurt them before they hurt you?
I'm not saying anything I say to hurt you, or well, I can't think of the other things you said....mocking is one, don't know about others, doesn't matter.
It's because I'm not going to walk around on eggshells for you or anyone else, essentially putting a gag on myself. You seem to think you can say anything you want.