@Thomas,
I'm not in the closet with my family. My most religious cousins probably pray for me among others, but don't even try to argue me out of my ways, nor do I natter at theirs. That batch of cousins and I also differ politically. We like what we like about each other and don't go for the undercut. This would probably differ if we saw each other every day. They are also neater people. Viva la differance (I say in poor french).
Alternately, I think my atheism is a problem for my least religion practicing cousins, the leader of which takes my lack of belief as arrogant, and then probably hinges on to that all sorts of early life reasons she resented me. I didn't have excema, for example. Well, she did have a hard time, well self observed - which is not derogatory, just that she has elaborate memories of all that. We had gotten to be friends in the meantime, but resentment seems to have won out, against the first mentioned cousins and myself.
She has turned into a sort of guru in a certain kind of psychotherapy in her own way, and I'm starting to think of her as woo-hoo, in a sort of control mania.
So: vast differences in ideology can be bridged, but longtime resentments enhance whatever ideology disagreements occur.
I suppose this can be especially true in academia.