Ways to pull 10 year old into the real world

I asked sozlet about this and she had a question I hadn't considered -- how long has he been at this school? You mention a friend from an "old" school -- was that last year, or longer?

She says that if he started at his current school this year, it would make sense that he hasn't quite (I think she used the word "acclimated," can't remember), and that it's likely to change with a little more time. As in, he's likely to make more friends at school (and then want to see them outside of school, too).

Oh, hey, thanks sozlet! Duckie transferred to this school in second grade, so this would be his third year there. He has made friends but no strong friendships. Lots of girls... don't know what it is with my kids who each seem to enjoy the company of the opposite sex more than there own, but that's life.

As an aside, I've been questioning whether I'm communicating where my concern comes from properly. I guess what it comes down to is that it appears to me that he's unhappy and that he hides in books, video games, computers, and tv for solace. I don't know how to describe it in words where this impression comes from.

I think I get ya.

Part of how we went in that direction is she was thinking of a new friend of hers who is new this year and would read at lunch time -- now she has some friends and isn't reading at lunch anymore.

I'd do the same thing, read as a defense mechanism (as well as just for fun).

Sozlet has a lot of male friends too -- it seems easier in earlier grades to get together outside of school with opposite-sex friends. Maybe not?

Lots of good ideas here -- maybe next step is to sit down with him, see what he has to say, run some ideas past him.

I forget, did you say whether Ducklet has a more robust social life and if so, if there's anything that works for her that could maybe work for Duckie?

Yeah, I think next steps are right. I wanted to say, in response to the helicopter parent accusations, that all I've actually done about my concern so far is start a discussion thread on A2K. It's time to try to get in his head a little and see what he's open to.

Yeah, Ducklet's social life is more robust, but I think it's just a difference in personalities at this point. We don't really do anything to encourage it one way or the other.

You? Helicopter parent? Pshaw.

Not quite emphatic enough. PSHAW.

(I think you know this but I felt the need to say.)

Good luck...

So what if the 10 year old is Walter Mitty Junior...it's our differences that make us human. That's not to say I condone all the characteristics of humanity.

Hear, hear! Why must sports always be shoved down the throats of young kids who don't want them? Could there possibly be a little anti-intellectualism in our sports-saturated culture?