Q: Why was six afraid of seven?
A: Because seven ate nine!
Did you hear about the cracker's Christmas party?
It went with a bang!
How do you make idiots laugh on boxing day?
Tell them a joke on Christmas Eve!
How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?
Deep pan, crisp and even!
If athletes get athletes foot, what do rocket scientists get?
Mum, Can I have a dog for Christmas?
No, you can have turkey like everyone else!
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?
What often falls at the North Pole but never gets hurt?
Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?
He had no body to dance with.
What do ghosts say when something is really neat?
What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party?
Why did the game warden arrest the ghost?
He didn't have a haunting license.
Where did the goblin throw the football?
Over the ghoul line.
What do you call a goblin who gets too close to a bonfire?
A toasty ghosty.
What kind of makeup do goblins wear?
Who beats his chest and swings from Christmas cake to Christmas cake?
What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas, Eve!
What did the big angel say to the little angel?
Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?
What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a detective?